Combat Colin

Combat Colin is a comic created, written, and drawn by Lew Stringer originally published by Marvel UK. The strip tells of the misadventures of "Combat Colin" Doobrey-Smiff, a would-be action hero living in British suburbia. Armed with an array of ludicrous weaponry in the bottomless pockets of his Combat Trousers, Colin defended his home of Wallytown and nearby Skegpool with his over-enthusiastic and under-educated sidekick Semi-Automatic Steve from an increasing number of yampy supervillains, like mad professor Professor Madprof, freeze ray toting Aunt Arctic, and the mind-controlling alien Megabrain. Also, there were puns. Lots and lots of bad puns.

Combat Colin was created when Stringer was commissioned to contribute a military-themed humour strip to Marvel UK's weekly Action Force comic by its editor (and oftentime Transformers letterer) Richard Starkings. His eventual concept resembled Colin as we know him, but under the name "Dimbo" (as a parody of Rambo). After the editorial team felt the name would date quickly, Steve White suggested the name "Combat Colin". In turn, Starkings came up with "Semi-Automatic Steve", named for (and partially based on) White.^[1]

The strip, initially known as Codename: Combat Colin, debuted in Action Force issue 5 as a half page gag strip, but due to its popularity it was running regularly as a full-pager from issue 25 (after a dalliance with the format in issue 19). After Action Force weekly ended at issue 50 and folded into the Marvel UK Transformers comic, Combat Colin followed over, becoming a regular feature from issue 153 onwards, and replacing Robo-Capers, also by Stringer. In issue 171, the strip permanently dropped the "Codename" from the title, with "Combat Colin" sharing the billing with Semi-Automatic Steve, the Giggly Sisters, or whatever villain or doobrey (Combat Slang for wotsit or thingummybob) that appeared in a particular story.

The revamp of Transformers in issue 224 relocated Combat Colin to the centre bunch of black-and-white pages (boo!), allowing it the space to become a full page strip in every issue in which it appeared (yay!). The strip was occasionally coloured during this time, and from issue 300, the strip was in full colour every week. The final instalments of Combat Colin in the final two issues received two pages each.

Although Combat Colin began life as an Action Force inspired strip, he proved highly popular in Transformers and remained in the comic even when Action Force, a.k.a. G.I. Joe the Action Force, a.k.a. G.I. Joe, was absent (between issues 183-190, 213-219, and permanently from 306 onwards). It remains as a feature that British fans of a certain age will point to as giving Transformers UK its unique charm.

Combat Colin/Transformers connections

Combat Colin and Semi-Automatic Steve ended their final escapade in the pages of Action Force by telling their readers that they'd be hopping over into The Transformers. "We wouldn't appear in just any old comic," according to Colin, so make sure you order a copy from your newsagent!^{[A 1]}

During their debut strip in The Transformers, Colin pre-empted the mind-boggling action of a rampaging robot to introduce himself and Steve to their new readers. A nonplussed Steve had to tell him that they only take up half a page in Transformers, leading Colin to sheepishly tell the readers that the mind-boggling action would have to wait until the next issue.^{[A 2]}

Colin and Steve stopped the machinations of the evil genius Professor Madprof, who had used his time machine to mix up Spring and Winter and produce unseasonable weather. According to Col, however, Madprof's worse crime was mixing up the instalments of the Classic Covers Calendar.^{[A 3]}

After foiling the Brain's plan to use dumbed-down TV shows to turn viewers into zombies, Colin advised the audience to stay away from soaps, game shows and sitcoms, lest their brains turn to custard. Instead, he encouraged reading books, magazines, and Marvel Comics, using Transformers as an example alongside other fine publications. (Steve wondered if they were on commission.)^{[A 4]}

Colin's home of Wallytown had an avid Transformers readership: one wall was graffitied with "TRANSFORMERS IS TOPS!",^{[A 5]} a poster on another simply read "TRANSFORMERS IS TRIFF!",^{[A 6]} and a sign on the road to the Posh Doughnut caravan advised viewers to reserve a copy of Transformers every fortnight.^{[A 7]} The official membership card for the Combat Colin Fan Club was valid to prove that members read Colin's brill adventures in the Transformers comic every week.^{[A 8]}

Doctor Strange is distinguishable from Doctor Peculiar by the lack of a crop circle in his facial hair.

When the Giggly Sisters took over the strip for a week and turned it into "The Giggly Sisters' Nice Page", Joanne Giggly's advice column received a letter from Mick Einstein, age 47, who asked whether the conflicting storylines between the Transformers comic and TV series was the result of alternative universes or doppelgangers. Joanne replied that she didn't know, as she'd watch Cookery Corner on the other channel instead.^{[A 9]}

Colin and Steve were looking forward to the party to celebrate both Christmas and the 250th issue of Transformers, but when they arrived, a sign on the door told them the party was for Transformers only and that humans weren't invited – "In other words: clear off, you two!" They instead held their own party in the Combat Shed and invited many heroes and villains from other Marvel comics. Christmas with Combat Colin ^[2]

On a trip to Mars, Semi-Automatic Steve and the Giggly Sisters extolled the virtues of being a regular reader of the comic, as they would know that the voyage followed on from their previous adventure. The narrative then stopped to say "hard cheese!" to casual readers, as they should have a regular order for Transformers.^{[A 10]}

On Mars, Colin was confronted by his old enemy, Megabrain, and the two fought using the ancient custom of insults to the death. Telling Col he was only good enough to have a back-up strip in a toy robot comic allowed Megabrain to gain the upper hand.^{[A 11]} Reminding Colin of his fictionality would prove to be Megabrain's undoing; Colin used the startling sight of tens of thousands of loyal Transformers readers beyond the fourth wall to distract Megabrain long enough for Col to blast him out of the comic's panel borders.^{[A 12]}

Colin produces irrefutable truth that he is in the real world. Uh, don't worry about the headline.

Later, Colin and Steve decided to take the day off to celebrate the 300th issue of Transformers, when almost all of his villains launched a joint attack. After defeating them with a single blast from a boxing-glove gun, Colin was so elated, he suggested he might boot out the Transformers and take over the whole comic. Suddenly, Blaster appeared and picked up Colin to ask him, "Boot out WHO and take over WHAT?" Colin decided it would be best to stick to his own page after all. Combat Colin issue 300

At the outset of a new adventure, Steve consulted his copy of Transformers, and was thankful that the increased page count meant that the Combat Colin strip could run that week.^{[A 13]}

Megabrain's final gambit was to try and convince Colin that he and Steve had been stuck in a dream world for the previous two-and-a-half years in order to drive them doo-lally. Colin discovered the truth when he deduced the date from that morning's copy of the Solihull News, which ran with the front page headline that Transformers was going monthly.^{[A 14]} (Oops.)

Notes

One of Marvel UK's most fondly remembered action strips and also Action Force.

• Colin got a G.I. Joe-style unintelligence profile in Action Force issue 30, which claimed he'd applied for the titular Action Force. "They refused. He applied again. They refused. He applied again. They nuked his bedroom. He got the message."^[1] Steve got a profile of his own in Action Force issue 49, which revealed his full name to be Steve Whatsisname.
• Colin and his friends are shown to co-exist with Transformers, as well as the Transformers comic. A similar set-up is present on the comic's letters page, which insisted that the comic was a dramatisation of real events starring real Transformers. Is Combat Colin canon to Transformers?? Or is a British kids gag strip merely obligated to wink at the fourth wall every few panels??? You, the reader, decide!
• To celebrate the 200th issue of Transformers, Combat Colin crossed over with Robo-Capers in a story in which King No-Nose and the Robot Inventor decided to give up attempting to conquer Earth forever after Col unwittingly and accidentally trounced their latest effort. (The strip's narration mentions that long-time readers of The Transformers will recognise the two villains, but that's not quite Transformersy enough to document above.)
• As well as occasionally appearing in the world of the Transformers, Colin had some adventures involving other characters from the mainstream Marvel Universe. Spider-Man makes cameos in a number of strips, whilst Doctor Doom appeared in one two-part story.^[3] A story from 1988 saw an encounter with the Gwanzulums, a race of shapeshifters who menaced a number of Marvel UK titles, consisting of Doctor Who Magazine, ThunderCats, and The Real Ghostbusters. The Gwanzulums were created by writer John Freeman and artist Lee Sullivan for Doctor Who, but it was Richard Starkings' idea to have them "secretly invade" other comics, with Combat Colin becoming their de facto series of debut due to differing publication times.^[4]
• Lew Stringer retained the rights to Combat Colin after The Transformers ended thanks to Freeman's negotiations with incoming Marvel UK editor Paul Neary, as part of "a broad effort to recoup some goodwill" before he shook up the company with "Genesis '92".^[5] This has allowed Stringer to sporadically feature Colin in new stories, and to produce printed collections of all the old Action Force/Transformers-published strips.^[6] Notably, he can't reprint the Gwanzulum storyline, as Marvel owns the little sods... though Marvel can't reprint the story either, as they would need his permission to use Colin.^[7]
• The strip ended with Colin and Steve apparently killed by a nuclear bomb, but a sequel "The Return of Combat Colin" revealed that they had been sent back in time to Blackpool in the year 1967.^[8] A further sequel, "Combat Colin in the 21st Century" saw them turn a candy floss spinner into a time machine and they ended up at the Transforce convention in the year 2000, where they witnessed (a clone of) their enemy Doctor Nasty use a heat ray to meld a fan to his Optimus Prime toy forever.^[9]

External links

• Combat Colin at Wikipedia
• Combat Colin at International Superheroes
• Blimey! It's another blog about comics!, by Lew Stringer

References

Strip citations