Music to your eyes

Music fans are in for a treat soon with several key shows coming up on the box.

This Sunday it's MTV's AVMA Awards from 8:00pm. Guests and performers include Good Charlotte, Fergie from the Black Eyed Peas, Pink, Jared Leto and 30 Seconds to Mars, Eskimo Joe and lots more. They've even brought out Nicole Richie for the event (Why? Oh that's right, Anna Nicole wasn't available).

But the beat doesn't stop there. Not only is Eurovision just around the corner, but to get us in the mood SBS is screening the San Remo Song Festival from Italy. And have a listen to their line-up: Scissor Sisters, Take That, Mika (could it get any gayer?), Joss Stone, John Legend and Norah Jones.

The San Remo Song Festival has been running longer than Eurovision and it's the reason we never see Italy in the latter. It was staged in Feb / March this year.

SBS will screen the contest over five Saturday afternoons, so keep your wits about you if you want to see these acts!

And finally Seven is bringing Live N Local Up Close to Sunday mornings: The ultimate experience for the ultimate fan as we bring you unusually 'Up Close' with the world's most interesting artists. Filmed at music festivals across Australia, view superb live performances, fans experiences and intimate interviews with a stellar line- up of acts including WOLFMOTHER, GOMEZ, BOB EVANS, BLUE KING BROWN, OZOMATLI and ZIGGY MARLEY. Hosted by SARAH McLEOD.

AVMAs main show screens 8pm Sunday on MTV.
San Remo Song Festival premieres 1pm Saturday May 5 on SBS.
Live N Local Up Close premieres 10am Sunday May 6 on Seven.
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Fuglies...and the nominees are!

The rather fabulous Julia Zemiro and Rockwiz feature prominently in the "good" categories in the 2007 Fugly Awards.

Both Zemiro and the SBS quiz show have been nominated in the "Underacknowledged Female" and "Underacknowledged Show" categories. Others include Sonia Kruger, Peter Helliar, Adam Hills / RPA, Spicks and Specks and The Chaser's War on Everything.

In the "bad" categories the nominees for worst show and personality include The Catch Up, David Tench Tonight, Yasmine's Getting Married, Celebrity Dog School / Daryl Somers, Kyle Sandilands, Richard Wilkins, Jackie O, Naomi Robson and Angela Bishop.

Nominees for the Show Most Messed Around by a Network are Late Show with David Letterman, Chaser's War on Everything, Scrubs, The Shield, The Sopranos and Veronica Mars.

Voting for The Fuglies closes next week.

April 26, 2007. It is time for unhappy television viewers to vote in the TV Fugly Awards and help decide what they think were the the worst shows and stars on Australian television from the last 12 months.

Started as joke in 2002, the Fuglies are primarily about recognising the bad television programming and received just over 4500 submission to determine the nominees. This year for the first time ever, bookmakers have framed odds and are taking bets in some categories for who will win.

Last year’s big winner, Daryl Somers, is again nominated for Worst Male TV personality against eight-time Fuglies winner Eddie McGuire who is back in the running after being excluded in 2006 when he was longer an on-air personality. Others also in the contention for the dubious honour include Karl Stefanovic, Richard Wilkins, Andrew G and Kyle Sandilands.

In the the Worst TV Show category there are eight nominees including David Tench Tonight, Celebrity Dog School, Big Brother and. The Catch Up

For the first time in the history of The Fuglies, a person who has appeared only on television via an advertisement could win an award with the Women From Over 50s Insurance Commercials being nominated. She is up against AJ Rochester from Australia’s Biggest Loser, Gretel Killeen from Big Brother and Libby Gore from Channel Nine’s the Catch Up for the Worst Female TV Personality category.

“That was kind of a surprise when the nominations were coming in at first. But these awards attract a smart bunch of voters that watch a lot of television so the presentation, tone and performance in those advertisements is obviously something that has got on people’s nerves.” said organiser of the TV Fugly Awards, Anthony Dever, about Women From Over 50s Insurance Commercials being a nominee.

In one of the more complimentary categories - Adam Hills, Alan Brough, Chas Licciardello, Julia Zemiro, Peter Hellier and Sonya Kruger are competing for the rights to be the Most Under Acknowledged TV Personality.

The winners will be announced at a low key event on Friday, May 4, which will not be televised and most likely for the 6th year running no recipients will turn up to accept their awards.

“While there will be no red-carpet and no overseas celebrities flown in a day before to glamorise the the event we will try to get some fake applause sound effects and maybe ensure twenty ex-Big Brother housemates are in attendance to provide the necessary c-list feel every awards night should have.” says Dever.

The disgruntled Australian television viewing public has the chance to vote for their least favourite television stars and shows until midnight the evening of Thursday, May 4, via the web site http://www.fugly.com.au

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A full list of TV Fugly Awards nominees is below:

Worst TV Show
- Big Brother
- Celebrity Dog School
- Celebrity Survivor
- David Tench Tonight
- Today Tonight
- The Catch Up
- The Con Test
- The Footy Show (AFL)
- The Footy Show (NRL)
- Yasmin¹s Getting Married

Worst Male TV Personality
- Andrew G
- Daryl Somers
- David Reyne
- Eddie McGuire
- Jake Wall
- Karl Stefanovic
- Kyle Sandilands
- Richard Wilkins

Worst Female TV Personality
- AJ Rochester
- Angela Bishop
- Dannii Minogue
- Gretel Killeen
- Jackie O
- Libby Gore
- Naomi Robson
- Women from the Over 50s insurance television advertisements

Most Biased Sporting Commentator
- John Alexander
- Mark Taylor
- Phil Gould
- Robert Walls
- Stephen Quartermain
- Tony Greig

‘The Eddie’ for Most Over Exposed TV Personality
- Bert Newton
- David Koch
- Grant Denyer
- Gretel Killeen
- Jamie Durie
- Jules Lund
*Note* Kevin Rudd nearly got a chance again in this category.

Most Spankable Female TV Personality
- Anna Coren
- FiFi Box
- Jennifer Hawkins
- Johanna Griggs
- Lavinia Nixon
- Monique Wright
- Myf Warhurst
- Natalie Barr
- Nikki Osborne
- Sarah Murdoch
- Sandra Sully
- Sonya Kruger

Spunkiest Male TV Personality
- Adam Hills
- Andy Lee
- Chas Licciardello
- Chris Taylor
- Chris Hemsworth
- Jamie Durie
- Jake Wall
- Jules Lund
- Matthew Johns
- Ryan Phelan
- Tom Williams
- Wil Anderson

Most Under Acknowledged TV Show
- RockWiz
- RPA
- Spicks and Specks
- The Chaser¹s War on Everything
- The Glass House
- The Ronnie Johns Half Hour

Most Under Acknowledged TV Personality
- Adam Hills
- Alan Brough
- Chas Licciardello
- Julia Zemiro
- Peter Hellier
- Sonya Kruger

Newsreader/TV Journalist with the Most Gravitas
- Chris Reason
- Ian Ross
- Kerry O¹Brien
- Juanita Phillips
- Mal Walden
- Mark Ferguson
- Mary Kostakidis
- Peter Harvey

Show that was messed around the most by a television network in the last 12
months
- Late Show with David Letterman
- Scrubs
- The Chaser¹s War on Everything
- The Shield
- The Sopranos
- Veronica Mars

New Sports to broadcast on TV
- Birdman Rally
- Competitive Eating
- Dwarf Tossing
- Extreme Ironing
- Jelly Wresting
- Rock Paper Scissors
- Schoolyard Handball
- Scrabble
- Speed Text Messaging
- Sudoku

Naomi Robson¹s worst incident of the year
- Princess in Beaconsfield
- The Wa-Wa Incident
- Tribute to Steve Irwin

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About the TV Fugly Awards:
The TV Fugly Awards are an independent Internet based survey of Australian viewers with categories that TV Week Magazine keeps forgetting to add to the Logie Awards voting form. The Fuglies were started as a joke in 2002 because he did no¹t like the Logies voting process and thought Australia needed annual television awards without glitz, glamour or even a proper ceremony to make fun of the bad programming.

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Karaoke queen Kate

Kate Ritchie, the girl who has grown up before our very eyes, will join Grant Denyer in co-hosting It Takes Two.

She replaces Teresa Livingstone from series one after she copped more flak than praise.

Home & Away's Kate is again nominated for a Gold Logie next week. She has appeared on the soap since 1988.

Last year Ritchie also appeared in the ABC telemovie Stepfather of the Bride. She has also recently commenced a radio role with Nova.

Last year Ritchie appeared as one of the singers on ITT, but as co-host the gig will mean flying to Melbourne every week where the series is filmed.

It Takes Two premieres on Tuesday May 8 replacing Dancing with the Stars.

Source.

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Bert's hair on tour

Look I do like Bert, but here's some news that I really don't get.

Bert's hair is going on tour.

Why?

If this is a stunt to supposedly endear us to Bert's Family Feud it seems misguided to me.

Nine wryly tells us that Bert's retired hairpiece, styled for him in 2005, will criss-cross the country from the Sunshine Coast to Perth to be won by a home viewer, along with a $10,000 prize.

The cash bit I understand. But I couldn't think of anything worse than having Bert's hair in my house (and I consider myself something of a memorabilia fan). But Bert's hair? Eww. Two words. E- BAY.

Maybe it's supposed to be a comic take on the fact that Graham Kennedy's crown sold for $17,000 this week. Now that would be worth having.

All of this is a distraction from the bleedingly obvious. Bert's Family Feud is dragging down National Nine News. Nine needs to recognise that the audience has fallen into two camps with Bert, love or hate. I am still in the first, but I don't think a hairpiece touring the land is really the answer. The problem is format and timeslot. It is essentially a twee format that is against the killer might of Deal or No Deal. Moved to 5pm it might fare better.

And when, oh, when will Nine give Bert a Saturday Parkinson style show? He's the next best interviewer after Denton but all he gets to ask is 'Name something you see at a Birthday Party?"

Press Release:

In the magnificent tradition of some of Australia’s greatest tours (Royalty, The Ashes, The Rolling Stones) comes the ultimate tour … Bert’s hair.

Bert and his hair will soon be parted – in May, BERT’S FAMILY FEUD will start a two-week cash giveaway, with a lucky home viewer winning $1000 each night, culminating in the grand prize of Bert’s famed locks, beautifully presented on a custom-made bust and stand, plus $10,000.

The hairpiece and stand will embark on a national tour to be launched on Thursday, April 26 on Channel Nine’s TODAY. From there the hairpiece will tour to Sydney, Brisbane, Sunshine Coast, Gold Coast, Adelaide and Perth.

Bert’s hair tour dates:
May 1-6 Melbourne
May 7-8 Brisbane (Bert in Brisbane Tuesday, May 9)
May 9-10 Sunshine Coast
May 11-13 Gold Coast
May 14-20 Adelaide (Bert in Adelaide Thursday, May 17)
May 21 -25 Sydney (Bert in Sydney Tuesday, May 22)
May 26-30 Perth

The stylish hairpiece, designed for Bert in 2005, has graced the red carpet at numerous premieres and Logies events, appeared countless times on national television, and was part of the family when Bert walked his daughter Lauren down the aisle at her wedding to Australian Olympian Matt Welsh last year.

“For me it’s a case of ‘hair today, gone tomorrow’,” says Bert. “But I think it will be a lot of fun. I can promise you there is not one speck of dandruff.

“I look forward to being up on someone’s mantelpiece or wherever great works of art are displayed.”

Maybe I need a better sense of humour? Read more...

Wed Apr 25: Anzac Day

[Showtime/8:30pm] Movie: Kokoda (Aus 2006)

[ABC/9:00am] Anzac Day Coverage. ABC TV presenter Geraldine Doogue will host a live broadcast of the Dawn Service from Gallipoli during ABC TV’s comprehensive coverage of the 92nd Anzac Day commemorations on Wednesday, April 25th. 102,000 Australian defence force personnel have died in active service and they are buried in war graves in 80 nations and territories around the world. ABC TV’s 2007 Anzac Day coverage pays tribute to all defence force personnel – past and present. In particular, the coverage will focus on the threat of a major land invasion of the Australian mainland and the defensive action taken by Australian forces to halt, hold and drive back the enemy from reaching the nation’s shores.
* Anzac Day 2007 also commemorates the 89th anniversary of the end of WW I
* The year 2007 also marks the 65th anniversary of a number of crucial theatres of war, including; the first Japanese attack on an Australian territory at Rabaul
* The fall of Singapore which left 15, 000 Australians prisoners of war
* The bombing of Darwin, Katherine, Cairns, Townsville and Broome
* The infiltration of ‘midget’ submarines into Sydney Harbour
* The defeat of the Japanese on the land at Milne Bay, near Rabaul
* The recapture of the Kokoda Track, which put the Japanese on the defensive foot rather than the offensive
* The battles of the Coral Sea and Midway which held back the sea invasion to Australia’s mainland
* The allied victory in North Africa at El Alamein
* 2007 also marks the 90th anniversary of the Returned Services League of Australia
ABC TV's traditional coverage of the Anzac Day march on Australia's most sacred day continues in 2007 with live broadcasts of each State's capital city parade. Record crowds are expected to line city streets on this special day in honour of those Australians who have served in wars throughout the nation's history. The coverage will also include highlights of the stirring bugle calls, hymns, tributes and reverent silence from the emotive dawn services.

ACT
ABC TV's telecast will commence at 9am with live coverage of Sydney’s Anzac Day parade.
At 10.30am ACT, ABC TV news presenter, Virginia Haussegger, and military historian Dr Peter Stanley, will host a live broadcast from the Australian War Memorial in Canberra. The broadcast of the Dawn Service from Gallipoli will commence at 1.00pm.

9.00am ANZAC Day march 2007 (NSW - Live)
10.30am ANZAC Day march 2007 (ACT - Live)
12.00-noon ANZAC Day march 2007 (NSW - Live)
1.00pm Gallipoli Dawn Service 2007 (Live - delay)

NSW
About 23,000 veterans and serving personnel are expected to take part in Sydney's Anzac Day march which will commence at 9am. ABC TV’s coverage will include nine cameras strategically positioned to capture all the parade's colour and emotion.

ABC TV’s coverage will include special commentary from Lt Col John Moore RFD, retired infantry officer Major Robert Walls, military historian Dr Ian Phennigwerth, and Squadron Leader Gordon Johnstone.

NSW Governor Prof Marie Bashir will lead the parade of veterans (albeit, sadly no WWW I veterans) and support groups, including 70 band, scout and cadet members.

At 1.00pm the Dawn Service from Gallipoli will be televised from ANZAC Cove.

9.00am ANZAC Day march 2007 (NSW - Live)
1.00pm Gallipoli Dawn Service 2007 (Live - delay)

Victoria
ABC TV news presenter Ian Henderson hosts the Victorian broadcast of the Anzac Day march from 9am which will include footage from the Melbourne Dawn Service and historical perspectives by military historian Neil Smith and commentator John Reid. The broadcast of the Dawn Service from Gallipoli will commence at 1.00pm, with coverage of the Victorian ANZAC Day Memorial Service commencing at 2pm.

9.00am ANZAC Day march 2007 (VIC - Live)
1.00pm Gallipoli Dawn Service 2007 (Live - delay)
2.00pm Victorian ANZAC Day Memorial Service

Queensland
ABC TV's telecast in Brisbane will commence at 10am as the Anzac Day marchers pass City Hall to take the official salute from Governor Quentin Bryce. ABC Radio's Phil Smith will host the live broadcast, with special comments from Major Ross Eastgate OAM. Live broadcast of the Dawn Service from Gallipoli will commence at 12.30pm.

10.00am ANZAC Day march 2007 (QLD - Live)
12.30pm Gallipoli Dawn Service 2007 (Live)

Western Australia
Live coverage of Perth’s Anzac Day march, hosted by ABC presenter Glenn Mitchell and military historian Captain Wayne Gardiner, will commence at 9.30am. Coverage of Perth's Commemorative Service will commence at 11.00am, followed at 12-noon by a broadcast of the Dawn Service from Gallipoli.

9.30am ANZAC Day march 2007 (WA - Live)
11.00am Perth's Commemorative Service
12.00-noon Gallipoli Dawn Service 2007 (Live –delay)

South Australia
ABC TV’s coverage of Adelaide's Anzac Day march will commence at 9.30am with broadcasting stalwart Philip Satchell joined in commentary by acclaimed author and war historian Professor Bill Gammage.

As 2007 marks the 90th anniversary of the famous charge at Beersheba by Regiments of the Australian Light Horse, ABC TV will pay a special tribute to the two local SA units, the 3rd & 9th Light Horse Regiments, which both served with distinction during the successful Gaza-Beersheba campaign.

This will be followed by live coverage of the service at the Cross of Sacrifice in the Garden of Remembrance. Then at 12.30pm ABC TV will cross live to Anzac Cove in Turkey for full coverage of the Dawn Service.

9.30am ANZAC Day march 2007 (SA - Live)
12.30pm Gallipoli Dawn Service 2007 (Live)

Tasmania
ABC TV news presenter Peter Gee will host the Hobart Anzac Day march at 10.57am with expert comments by Brian McKenzie. The telecast will also include highlights of the Hobart Dawn Service and highlights from Launceston’s Anzac Day March. The live broadcast of the Dawn Service from Gallipoli will commence at 12.30pm.

10.57am Hobart ANZAC Day march 2005 (TAS - Live)
12.30pm Gallipoli Dawn Service 2005 (Live)

Northern Territory
The top end's Anzac Day telecast will commence at 9am with coverage of the Sydney march. ABC Radio presenter Julia Christensen and military historian Bob Alford will host Darwin's ANZAC Day coverage at 11.30am. Live broadcast of the Dawn Service from Gallipoli will commence at 12.30pm.

9.00am ANZAC Day march 2007 (NSW - Live)
11.30am ANZAC Day march 2007 (NT - Live)
12.30pm Gallipoli Dawn Service 2007 (Live)

[ABC/8:00pm] The New Inventors
[ABC/8:30pm] Spicks And Specks
[ABC/9:00pm] The Chaser's War On Everything
[ABC/9:35pm] The Catherine Tate Show. Nan meets Jason's girlfriend Cheryl and comments on the size of her big nose. Derek is booking a holiday in Ibiza for himself and Leonard and is outraged when asked if they'd want a double bed. Drunken bride Victoria Russell insults her new husband and his family in a memorable wedding speech. The crap croupier loses the ball from the roulette wheel. At BBJ's, waitress Amanda, puppet Pedro and the rest of the waiters break into a dance routine to The Lion Sleeps Tonight when a couple order jungle pizzas. Sheila Carter farts in the confession box. Lauren has Ryan's name and face tattooed on her arms, but ain't "bovvered" when he dumps her, and Irene and Vern tell Neville that Mikhail Gorbachev dropped in en route to a rugby match.
[ABC/10:05pm] At The Movies. Margaret Pomeranz and David Stratton take us into the world of cinema. THE NUMBER 23 - Starring Jim Carrey, Virginia Madsen, Danny Huston. A man's (Carrey) life unravels after he comes into contact with an obscure book titled ‘The Number 23’. As he reads the book, he becomes increasingly convinced that it is based on his own life. His obsession with the number 23 starts to consume him, and he begins to realise the book forecasts far graver consequences for his life than he could have ever imagined.THE SCIENCE OF SLEEP- Directed by Michel Gondry (Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind) a playful romantic fantasy set inside the topsy-turvy brain of Stephane Miroux (Gael García Bernal), an eccentric young man whose dreams constantly invade his waking life. TIDELAND - directed byTerry Gilliam, a hallucinatory tale told through the highly imaginative eyes of a young girl, the daughter of junkies, who is taken to the country after her mother dies. Her ‘reality’ becomes peppered with fantastical creatures like talking squirrels, bodiless Barbie doll heads that momentarily come to life, and clouds of computer-generated fireflies. Gilliam’s twisted imagination is brought to life by stunning photography, vivid performances and a gleefully irreverent script. THE ITALIAN - Russian film set in 2002, an abandoned 5-year-old boy living in a rundown orphanage in a small Russian village is adopted by an Italian family. CURSE OF THE GOLDEN FLOWER - Directed by Zhang Yimou. The ill-fated romance between an imperial bodyguard and a prince takes the lovers on a dangerous journey where royal family secrets are revealed. TALES FROM EARTHSEA - the latest wondrous film from award-winning Studio Ghibli (HOWL'S MOVING CASTLE, SPIRITED AWAY). Directed by Goro Miyazaki, and based on Ursula K. Le Guin's popular EARTHSEA series, and inspired by SHUNA'S JOURNEY by Hayao Miyazaki, TALES FROM EARTHSEA is a visually breathtaking adventure story for all ages. In the land of Earthsea, crops are failing and livestock dying. Two dragons appear from the storm clouds and devour each other - an omen of impending disaster. The balance of the world is in peril of tearing apart

[Ten/8:30pm] House. "Merry Little Christmas"
[Ten/9:30pm] The Ultimate Donation

[Nine/7:30pm] McLeod’s Daughters.
[Nine/8:30pm] Cold Case. “Lonely Hearts.” Guest: Bruno Campos
[Nine/9:30pm] Without a Trace. “Win today” Advisory: Due To Violent Content, Viewer Discretion Is Advised

[Seven/7:30pm] Last Chance Learners. Follow ten of Australia's worst drivers as they attempt to pass their driving test. After years of driving failure, the Last Chance Learners Driving School is the final point of call for our desperate learners. Under the tuition of two of the countries top driving instructors, if they are able to finally break the cycle of failure, our learners can walk away with newfound freedom thanks to a licence and a brand new car! Hosted by MIKE WHITNEY.
[Seven/8:30pm] Heroes. CHAPTER THIRTEEN 'THE FIX'
Chased by unknown assailants, Hiro's search for the sword takes an unexpected turn. A cleaned up Isaac dedicates himself to stopping New York's destruction and Peter. H.R.G. focuses his efforts on the murderous, Sylar. Claire secretly embarks on a search for her true birth parents. While working to find those on 'the list,' Suresh receives a surprising visitor. Guest starring Christopher Eccleston and George Takei.
[Seven/9:30pm] Prison Break. THE KILLING BOX. Bellick returns to Fox River, but not the way he planned. Michael and Lincoln are en route to join him, but Mahone and Kellerman will do everything in their power to make certain the brothers are dead on arrival. T-Bag pays a surprise visit to Mrs. Hollander. Starring WENTWORTH MILLER, DOMINIC PURCELL, WILLIAM FICHTNER, AMAURY NOLASCO, PAUL ADELSTEIN and ROBERT KNEPPER.

[Seven/10:30pm] 24. 9:00PM - 10:00PM. Jack enlists Gredenko to help him, but Gredenko has his own secret agenda that doesn't involve helping CTU. The President comes back strong, but his authority is being questioned by the Vice President. Guest starring RICK SCHRODER. Also starring KIEFER SUTHERLAND, MARY LYNN RAJSKUB, DB WOODSIDE, JAMES MORRISON, ROGER CROSS, PETER MACNICOL, REGINA KING, JAYNE ATKINSON, ERIC BALFOUR and CARLO ROTA.

[SBS/7:30pm] Eco House Challenge – Emission Impossible - After living in darkness for a week, the Edwards family finally pass the water challenge and their energy hotspot is returned. Relieved and upbeat, they move on to the next hotspot challenge – a sixty percent reduction in their energy use. Meanwhile, back at the Shepherd’s home, twenty-year-old Mac has been left home alone, and Shauna has grave concerns that he may blow their energy target. Twenty-four hours since the start of the energy challenge and the data is in: the Shepherd family has passed and the Edwards family has failed! (Commissioned by SBSi, in English) (Documentary Series) G CC WS [SBS/10:00pm] Movie: Swimming Pool - Sarah Morton is a famous British mystery author. Tired of London and seeking inspiration for her new novel, she accepts an offer from her publisher John Bosload to stay at his home in Luberon, in the South of France. It is the off-season and Sarah finds that the beautiful country locale and unhurried pace is just the tonic for her, until late one night, when John's indolent and insouciant French daughter Julie unexpectedly arrives. Sarah's prim and steely English reserve is jarred by Julie's reckless, sexually charged lifestyle. Their interactions set off an increasingly unsettling series of events, as Sarah's creative process and a possible real-life murder begin to blend dangerously together. Written and directed by Francois Ozon, and stars cinema legend Charlotte Rampling and Ludivine Sagnier. (From France, in English and French, English subtitles) (Drama) (2003) (Rpt) MA (S,N,A) CC WS
[SBS/1:15am Thu] Drawn Together - Eight animated characters are drawn together to put up with each other, Big Brother reality television-style. Tonight, the housemates are divided into two groups for a contest and the losers must go without any food. (From the UK, in English) (Animated Comedy Series) MA (S,A) (Rpt) CC WS

[Movie Extra/8:30pm] Movie: March of the Penguins (US 2005) Read more...