THE MYSTERY OF MARRIAGE AMID DECONSTRUCTION A Dialogue Between Orthodox Anthropology and Postmodern Perspectives Father Bassam Antoine Nassif Saint John of Damascus Institute of Theology University of Balamand iv 320 First Edition January 2022 Daccache Printing House Amchit: 978-614-454-057-2 - Lebanon - Tel: 09 622280 - 03 606310 Email: [email protected] The cover icon of Christ with Adam and Eve in paradise is specially made by Serge Nassif. It is a copy of a mosaic from the Holy Convent of the Annunciation - Ormylia, Greece. v CONTENTS LIST OF ABBREVIATIONS.............................................................................................................................................. ix PREFACE AND ACKNOWLEDGEMENTS ................................................................................. xi INTRODUCTION • State of the Question ........................................................................................................................................................................ 1 o Social Issues ..................................................................................................................................................................................... 1 Secular Mindset .............................................................................................................................................................. 2 Moral Freedom .............................................................................................................................................................. 4 Utilitarian Spirit ............................................................................................................................................................. 5 Physical Intimacy .......................................................................................................................................................... 6 Body Worship .................................................................................................................................................................... 8 Gender Roles....................................................................................................................................................................... 8 Economy .................................................................................................................................................................................. 10 Power of the Media ................................................................................................................................................. 12 Marriage Legal Contract ................................................................................................................................... 13 New Family Forms ..................................................................................................................................................... 14 Global Effect ....................................................................................................................................................................... 16 o Analysis of Current Social Issues..................................................................................................................... 17 • The Problem .................................................................................................................................................................................................... 21 o Church and Culture .............................................................................................................................................................. 21 o Thesis Questions ..................................................................................................................................................................... • Thesis Statement • Methodology • Literature Review • Overview of Chapters 22 .................................................................................................................................................................................... 27 ............................................................................................................................................................................................... 29 ................................................................................................................................................................................. 32 .................................................................................................................................................................. 34 CHAPTER 1: POSTMODERNISM AND THEOLOGY 1.1. From Modernity to Postmodernity .............................................................................................................................. 37 1.2. Major Postmodern Ideas.............................................................................................................................................................. 52 1.2.1. Rejection of Metanarratives ..................................................................................................................................... 52 1.2.2. Construction of Truth and Hermeneutics................................................................................................ 53 1.2.3. Deconstruction ........................................................................................................................................................................... 56 vi The Mystery of Marriage Amid Deconstruction 1.3. Implications on Anthropology .......................................................................................................................................... 59 1.4. Postmodern Insights and Orthodox Theology........................................................................................... 64 1.4.1. Hermeneutic Endeavors and Sacred Texts............................................................................................. 66 1.4.2. Truth, Mystery, Apophaticism and Eschatology ............................................................................. 68 1.4.3. Metanarratives and the Genesis Account................................................................................................. 73 1.5. Speaking Theology in Postmodern Times ........................................................................................................ 78 CHAPTER 2: LITERATURE REVIEW OF CHRISTIAN MARRIAGE 2.1. Theological Background of Modern and Postmodern Approaches to Marriage............................................................................................................................................................... 83 2.1.1. Original Sin and Shame................................................................................................................................................ 84 2.1.2. The Inescapable Physical Impurity of Conjugal Life.................................................................. 87 2.1.3. The Evil of Concupiscence ............................................................................................................................................. 90 2.2. Postmodern Approaches............................................................................................................................................................... 96 2.2.1. Accommodating Thinking ............................................................................................................................................. 98 2.2.2. The Golden Thread ................................................................................................................................................................ 100 2.2.3. Critical Familism ................................................................................................................................................................. 100 2.3. Literature Review of Contemporary Theological Perspectives ............................................ 101 2.3.1. A Protestant Perspective ................................................................................................................................................. 102 2.3.2. An Anglican Perspective ................................................................................................................................................. 106 2.3.3. A Catholic Perspective ....................................................................................................................................................... 108 2.3.4. An Orthodox Perspective ............................................................................................................................................... 112 CHAPTER 3: CREATION AND FREEDOM 3.1. The Human Being as a Mystery........................................................................................................................................ 119 3.2. Returning to First Principles ................................................................................................................................................. 124 3.3. The Genesis Narrative of Creation................................................................................................................................ 125 3.3.1. Male and Female in Communion ..................................................................................................................... 132 3.3.2. Male and Female in the Image of Christ ................................................................................................. 134 3.3.3. Male and Female with Free Will ...................................................................................................................... 138 3.4. The Role of the Human Faculties ................................................................................................................................... 143 vii Contents CHAPTER 4: PERSONHOOD AND PERSONALISM 4.1. Personhood....................................................................................................................................................................................................... 149 4.1.1. Personhood as Communion of Love................................................................................................................. 149 4.1.2. Personhood and Free Will............................................................................................................................................. 156 4.2. Personalism .................................................................................................................................................................................................... 158 4.2.1. The Seeds of Personalism ................................................................................................................................................. 158 4.2.2. Personalism and Free Will .......................................................................................................................................... 160 4.3. Living Personhood as a Domestic Church........................................................................................................ 164 4.4. Living Personhood in Marriage ........................................................................................................................................ 168 4.4.1. Marriage as an Eschatological Anticipation ...................................................................................... 168 4.4.2. Marriage as a Fellowship of Life ....................................................................................................................... 171 4.4.3. Marriage as a Journey to the Kingdom ...................................................................................................... 174 CHAPTER 5: PASTORAL IMPLICATIONS: MYSTERY, LOVE, AUTHORITY, AND INTIMACY 5.1. Marriage as a Mystery of the Kingdom................................................................................................................. 183 5.1.1. Post-secularism in Postmodernity ...................................................................................................................... 183 5.1.2. Mysteries of the Kingdom ............................................................................................................................................. 185 5.1.3. The Mystery of Marriage ............................................................................................................................................... 192 5.2. Marriage as the Mystery of Love in Christ...................................................................................................... 199 5.2.1. Love in Postmodernity ..................................................................................................................................................... 199 5.2.2. Love in the Ecclesial Context................................................................................................................................... 201 5.2.3. Love as a Communion of Forgivers ................................................................................................................ 209 5.3. Authority and Obedience ......................................................................................................................................................... 221 5.3.1. Gender Roles in Postmodernity............................................................................................................................. 221 5.3.2. Gender Roles in the Ecclesial Context .......................................................................................................... 223 5.3.3. Headship and Submission ............................................................................................................................................ 231 5.4. Physical Intimacy .................................................................................................................................................................................. 236 5 4.1. Physical Intimacy in Postmodernity ............................................................................................................. 236 5.4.2. Intimacy in the Ecclesial Context....................................................................................................................... 237 5.4.3. Marriage and Childbearing...................................................................................................................................... 239 The Mystery of Marriage Amid Deconstruction viii CONCLUSION • • • • Personhood and Marriage in Christian Anthropology ........................................................ 247 Pastoral Theology as Praxis ............................................................................................................................................ 251 Family Home as a “Little Church”..................................................................................................................... 254 Prospects for Future Research ................................................................................................................................... 262 BIBLIOGRAPHY • • Primary Sources.............................................................................................................................................................................. 267 Secondary Sources ...................................................................................................................................................................... 280 xi PREFACE AND ACKNOWLEDGMENTS Social changes in the contemporary era have directly influenced human life and existence, especially the meaning of marriage. In light of these contemporary developments, researchers have emphasized the urgent need to deconstruct marriage and re-constitute it, fundamentally altering its traditional characteristics and meaning in the process. Conversely, the Orthodox Church views the essence of marriage with an interminable consistency and continuity characterized by the mysterion of love in Christ. Is it viable to live the meaning of this mysterion in today’s postmodern era? To examine this issue, this study initiates an interdisciplinary dialogue between postmodern perspectives on marriage and family on the one hand, and the vision of Orthodox theology on the other. This new and unexplored dialogue endeavors to contribute to the positive engagement of the Orthodox Church with the postmodern world. Holding to the axiom that postmodernism has pertinent resonance with Christianity, this study begins by surveying relevant postmodern epistemologies. Thus, it analyzes signposts in the development of thought and the resulting impact on social life, love, gender, and free will, leading to new postmodern family forms. Since marriage is essentially a matter of anthropology, it further investigates various theological developments and anthropological themes pertaining to marriage. By returning to first principles and patristic sources it examines the impact that the theology of personhood in the East and the intellectual stance of personalism in the West have had on marriage. Based on these findings, it discusses, in a dialogic manner, four relevant antinomic issues of Christian theology and postmodern thought as they relate to marriage: mystery, love, authority, and intimacy. Drawing on the living words of Saint John Chrysostom, this study reconsiders the application of these four issues for marriage in a postmodern world, while nurturing the everlasting Christian view of marriage as the mysterion of love in Christ and the family as a “little church.” 1 INTRODUCTION State of the Question Contemporary developments in society resulting from various economic and political structures have yielded major social and cultural changes, leading to a new mode of human existence. These developments have overshadowed the life of the most vital cell of society: the family.1 The increase of dysfunctional families, fractured marital relationships, high rates of no-fault and serial divorces, and rising psychopathology resulting from emotional instability in the home are clear indications of the increasing chaotic state found in households (Amato 355-370; Coontz 1992: 77-96). Consequently, the traditional family form, composed of husband, wife, and children, is indeed in great disarray (Roudinesco 191). Hence, family and marriage have become popular subjects of interest sparking extensive research (Widmer et al. 131-156). Many recent sociological studies have built their research on a general conviction that traditional marriage is no longer a realizable or feasible option, since the culture of low marital commitment is now far more favored and widespread (Popenoe 527; Lewis 2001: 29; Stacey 1991: 251). As the new fashion of distressed clothing and shredded shirts became trendy, new forms of “distressed marriages and shredded families” have also surfaced. Some sociologists began to see this contemporary state as a “post-familial family” era (Beck-Gernsheim 2002: 9, 85). Social Issues Generally, the values and norms that characterized human life in previous generations have undergone a substantial revision and change within contemporary social thought, and on personal and social levels. 1 These developments in the state of marriage and family systems occurring in the last fifty years have been documented by Cambridge University social historian Peter Laslett and his colleagues Kenneth Wachter and Eugene Hammel. The Mystery of Marriage Amid Deconstruction 2 An amalgam of stimuli and events promotes fake values and trends which confuse families. Furthermore, the state of family dysfunction has produced various complications in understanding and experiencing love, freedom, spousal relationships, intimacy, communal living, and especially the concept of the human as being-as-person. To better understand the present situation of the family, it is important to consider, at least briefly, some notable social issues that have contributed to this erosion of family values and the disintegration of the family unit. Secular Mindset A rising momentum of a mentality of worldliness or a secular way of life, has yielded an anthropocentric, self-centered worldview, characterized by relativism, subjectivity, individualism, and materialism. One of the challenges of secularism is that it disregards any religious tradition or inherited social custom that does not fit into its current social paradigm, especially in the field of marriage and family. Secular-minded scientists have endeavored to understand the human brain and the evolutionary history behind it, believing that this effort opens the way to solve the mystery of the human makeup. Various reductionist methodologies have denied the possibility of accepting the existence of an inner, spiritual dimension in human nature, and the latter’s limitations and weaknesses. For example, the three inner human spiritual passions, or misdirected desires and unbridled appetites: love of power or domination, love of self or egoism, and love of fame or vanity (Mat. 4:1-8), are not taken by secular thought as “spiritual” weaknesses. Secular thought considers these passions as relatively individual, rational choices, and socially distinctive lifestyles. Human simplification as such distorts the value of the human being, his or her identity, dignity, and destiny, resulting in greater ambiguity regarding the meaning and vision for human life and existence. This secular thought has even creeped into those who consider themselves religiously committed Christians, directly affecting human thought, and specifically human totality and dignity. Introduction 3 After deducting or neglecting the spiritual, inner dimension from the human being’s dimensional totality, humans appear as creatures of solely biological, psychological, and social makeup.2 As an alternative, a different kind of spirituality, in the sense of an individual experience, emerged. This novel spirituality has embraced an anti-ascetic, relative, private, individualistic, sentimental, and feeling-good attitude. The concept of this novel spirituality is identical with anthropocentrism, aiming to achieve a well-being based on materialistic values. Using some elements from Christian worship, such as incense and candles, it is taken as a “mystical belief ” or “as a flight from the pursuit of historical and propositional truth to a preoccupation with mystical experience” (McCallum 211). This new kind of religiosity represents a secular religious concept, centered on a solitary search for meaning, transcendence, and connectedness through an individual experience. Additionally, the ethos of secularization is based on contingency or inevitable change since humans are seen as emerging from a long process of biological evolution. This ethos has compartmentalized the human being, turning sickness into a solely biological issue, psychopathology into a solely chemical imbalance, and social relations into a matter of economy, politics, and means for self-fulfillment. As a result, the absence of a holistic context of human nature has rendered any form of healing rather incomplete. Nevertheless, the modern hospice movement has rediscovered the essential dimensions of “total pain,” which include the physical, emotional, social, and spiritual distress. These dimensions are now increasingly taken into consideration for the treatment of sick people, and especially those who are in palliative care (Saunders 1-14). 2 The spiritual dimension, spiritual life, or spirituality of the Orthodox Church, is based on the life in the Holy Spirit, the life of repentance crowned by holiness. It is enacted through sacramental participation, and through prayer, and the work of purification from sin, freedom from the enslaving passions, and growth in union with God. It aims at possessing the gift of the Holy Spirit in humility and selfless love for God and the neighbor. Far from any Greek philosophical and disincarnating vision, or from the New Age esoteric mysticism, this spirituality is characterized by the abode of the Holy Spirit in the human body and through all the psychic faculties of the human being. The Mystery of Marriage Amid Deconstruction 4 The crux of secularism is the total reduction of humans, and all aspects of human life, especially personhood. Historical reductionism has yielded relativism, and the view that truth is historically conditioned, that is relative to each épistémè. Sociological reductionism considers the human being as a composite entity of ideas, concepts, ideals, behavior, and sociological statistics. It claims that it is sociology, and not free will, that guides all personal choices (Macionis 2-10). Various sociological approaches, such as structural-functional, conflict, or symbolic interaction theories, attempt to define human behavior, purpose, and finality. Moral Freedom The use and understanding of freedom have undergone a fundamental turn since individualistic principles became more pervasive. Moral freedom has been perceived in terms of the development of one’s subjective and independent individual moral code (Wolfe 471). This kind of freedom has become a slogan for human rights. It made the dream of the individual’s free self-fulfillment and self-sufficiency seemingly attainable. However, this moral freedom based on individualism and subjectivism, and characteristic of the post-human world, contributed to the erosion of traditional ethical thought. Consequently, a spiritual void, accompanied by a deep feeling of unhappiness, have emerged in the human self. Moreover, economic systems such as consumerism have created an unquenchable thirst for convenience and comfort, material wealth, self-seeking pleasure, and adaptation to individual needs. In fact, the kind of individualistic freedom that had been emphasized in modernity has thrived, after modernity, as boundless, individual, and quite often unlimited, irresponsible freedom. It has opened the way to the satisfaction of one’s instincts (driving propensities), and led to the separation from, and insensibility toward, the other, whether neighbor or close relative. Introduction 5 Moreover, human choices are increasingly relative and individualistic, as morals are more dependent on one’s judgement and one’s pursuit of happiness. This situation has led to competing moral visions, increased the high tide of selfishness, and established various free and individualistic lifestyles, such single-hood and lone family life forms. Freedom as emancipation from commitment, which is a promise or trust to live together, and covenant, which is a legally or religiously binding agreement, has caused the divorce rate to increase. The consequences on the children of divorced or separated couples are often devastating, since divorce may inflict on these children deep psychological wounds. These wounds could surface in their future relationships. Utilitarian Spirit Utilitarianism as a theory of morality advocates actions that foster happiness or pleasure and oppose actions that cause unhappiness. It promotes the greatest happiness for the greatest number of people. However, this logic may lead to justification for violating an individual’s welfare. Some people may pay a heavy price for the happiness of others in their community. This utilitarian logic accepts all actions and justifies them, as long as the end-results lead one to self-content (Lyons 1737-1744). Many examples of the spirit of utilitarianism can be seen today. As a result of the modern progress in genetic engineering, various new bioethical issues and challenges have emerged. Decisions in bioethical cases are often based on whatever leads to one’s personal happiness and self-gratification, regardless of morality. As an example, many old people suffering from Alzheimer’s disease are removed from their family environment and warm household, and placed in nursing homes, for the sole reason of not disturbing the peace of their grandchildren. Another example is a woman’s choice to abort an unwanted fetus, as some consider that what happens within a woman’s body is the woman’s private “right” and sole ownership, thus denying the right of the unborn children to live. Accordingly, if a woman decides to keep her pregnancy, she feels “obliged” to bear a child for nine months, change her diet, habits, or hobbies during her pregnancy, 6 The Mystery of Marriage Amid Deconstruction and finally go through several hours of intense labor pain, or probably undergo a C-section to deliver her baby. Some people see it as cruel to force a young woman to carry her unwanted pregnancy, since her life and daily business might be ruined. Nonetheless, abortion leaves indelible scars in the woman’s psyche. Further, organ donation and brain death might carry the risk of devaluing the donor’s life, in order to safeguard another life perceived to be more valuable. Arbitrary decisions about the value of one’s life over another raises ethical issues. Consequently, utilitarian logic may well turn out to be a sort of individualistic and egocentric societal logic that is infiltrating various fields of science and technology, and especially the domains of human friendship, fraternal relationships, and anthropology. Thus, this logic refuses to acknowledge an alternative way of existence, the way of sobriety and temperance that Christianity offers, which is summarized in crucifying one’s ego and patiently enduring for the sake of the other’s happiness and well-being. Physical Intimacy Being detached from their traditional settings and bonds, intimate relationships in the twentieth century have undergone big structural changes as societies became more individualistic and disconnected, not held by religion or wealth.3 The role of reproduction has been decoupled from intimate relations, while the notion of romantic love for self-fulfillment has gained preeminence (Delikostantis 96-100). Looking for a “soulmate” to marry begins by establishing passionate, instinctive feelings in relationships. Young men and women regard the emotional bond within marriage as an end in itself. They make “passionate love” contravene all traditional norms and practices of marriage, including critical priorities such as finding a house to accommodate the family, providing a source of income to live, or even looking for common values 3 The socio-historical developments regarding the organization of marriage have shown that marriage was used by religious institutions as a way to seize political power and social influence. 262 The Mystery of Marriage Amid Deconstruction may invite postmodern scholars to dialogue about this subject. This study has recalled many little narrations which could be taken into consideration by postmodern thinkers. In the Church, various and numerous little narrations of married saints stand as an undisputed testimony of the ever-living Orthodox perspectives on the human being, personhood, marriage, and family. These little narrations could be a bridge that some postmodern thinkers may be willing to cross when encountering Orthodoxy’s vision of marriage. Numerous credible accounts of married couples’ lives became models of marriage in Christ and holiness, through the application of this Orthodox theology (θεολογία). Despite the changing social, cultural, industrial, technological, economic, and religious elements of their various times in history, these married saints were able to synergically regulate their behavior and relational life. This path of witness through a life of repentance and inner renewal has been experienced throughout the ages, as recorded in the book of the Synaxarion. The kind of marital life dedicated to the love of God is the “pulpit” proclaiming the Christian Truth of creation and the “altar” upon which the family is built as a “house church” of the Christian martyrs’ myrrh-gushing “holy reliquaries” in the postmodern world. The husband and wife are thus united in Christ, since they each become Christ’s household, and their person a temple of the living God. • Prospects for Future Research This research about the mystery of marriage has dared to step into a world considered as post-Christian. However, as it has shown Christianity is not just about knowledge but about the Person of Christ, and His divine image, the human being. In this regard, there is no world which can be considered as post-Christian, as long as the human being lives. The prospects for future research in Christian marriage in postmodernity are numerous and wide. First, this incarnational theology has not been completely upheld in many places and various times throughout history. This failure resulted Conclusion 263 in utilitarian headship of the husband and slavery submission of the wife. However, Orthodox theology is not and cannot be dismissed as a theology of marriage shattered by experience, as some say (Haughton 149; Roudinesco 24). Although in Orthodox spirituality the ascetic labor of both prayer and fasting is a common task for monastics and lay people, this study has pointed out the urgent need to establish a specific spiritual guide for the Christian family living in the midst of a postmodern world. This guide could be a philokalian anthology of sayings and experiences that supports the husband, wife, and children in cultivating Christian virtues through the dynamics of their family relationships. In the “philokalian living,” love is looked upon as kenosis or learning self-emptying, gender role as liturgical service and order in the Dionysian sense, and physical intimacy as unity in temperance. Theology, in the Orthodox Christian understanding, is not a philosophical or rational discourse about God. It is rather the vision of God; it is the Church, the Liturgy, the Sacraments, and the Scriptures. It is after all a mystical encounter of “the inner life of the Trinity” (Golitzin 37). The question remains as a prospect for follow-up research: What could be the practical spiritual and pastoral guidelines to help married couples fully experience the Orthodox theology of marriage today and live their calling to deification in marriage? Second, postmodern studies underline the connection between changing times and pastoral theology. In his book Against Heresies (Book 2, Chapter 32), Saint Irenaeus wonders about how to apply all this old knowledge for helping others in the new and specific conditions of his day. The urgent pastoral task is to develop ways, not of contextualizing, but of appropriating or embracing particular circumstances of human life, without being legalistic or relativistic (Allen1994:10-11). The phronema of Christ, His life and His Incarnation, are true examples of Periptosiologia (Περιπτωσιολογία). According to Father Stanley Harakas, the ‘‘Periptosiologia’’ (Periptosis in Greek means the circumstance) is thus ‘‘the application of the moral rule to the specific cases” (1983: 12-13). Christ Himself, “being in the form of God, did not consider it robbery to be equal with God, but made Himself of no reputation, taking the form of a bondservant, and coming in the likeness of men” (NKJV, Phil. 2.5-7). 264 The Mystery of Marriage Amid Deconstruction Thus, Periptosiologia means embracing today’s pastorally challenging issues, while remaining grounded in Christ’s compassionate Incarnation and ensuing Christian anthropology, as it has been synthesized in the patristic corpus. Since times are continuously changing, this pastoral task is always dynamic and stretches from the Incarnation to the end of times. Here, another matter to be further explored is the following: what could be the correct and discerning use of oikonomia as an extension of divine mercy for the salvation of the other? Third, the challenge of the Periptosiologia is to adhere to Christ’s teachings and, “to seek to interpret and apply them with discernment and compassion in the given circumstances and conditions which confront us, while patiently enduring the ambiguities and tensions which inevitably rise” (Stylianopoulos 1989: 338). Various existing understandings of love, equality, and marriage are often shaped by legal, economic, and sociological contexts, and hermeneutic differences. Speaking about theology for today, this study sets an original approach to understanding these issues in pastoral theology. This approach opens another prospect to explore various issues related to family life, such as cohabitating and homosexual relationships, voluntary childlessness, and other bioethical issues. It calls to establish a neo-Patristic “pastoral” synthesis necessitated by Periptosiologia, through application of the following question: “How would the Fathers have treated the contemporary challenge of different human behavior, if they were alive today?” Fourth, this research has initiated an attempt to launch a dialogue of sincere love and humble self-criticism with postmodern thinkers on marriage in a spirit of openness and commitment. It endeavors to balance an openness that takes seriously on the one hand, the value of diversity and the danger of solipsism, and on the other, a commitment to the truth of Divine revelation experienced by Christians in various épistémè. The point here is not to prove the rightness of any interlocutors, but to communicate love and empathy, stir the latent richness of Christian theology, creatively reassess the insights of this theology, and invite others to “taste and see” the glory and beauty of marriage in Orthodoxy, a best-kept-secret. The continuous challenge is to work on bridging the gaps found in Orthodox Conclusion 265 pastoral theology between words and actions in a changing social context. Here, the daily pastoral work of the priest, supported by parishioners and parish ministry teams, is certainly essential. In conclusion, this study proves that the mysterion of marriage is viable today. The mysterion of marriage opens great possibilities in allowing people to see beyond the materiality of life towards a greater calling in the way of divine life. This way for each husband and wife is not about their moral rectification, but rather about their ontological transformation and transfiguration (μεταμόρφωσις) in Christ. Since the marital bond houses the mystical and vivifying presence of Christ’s glorious beauty and light, each couple living in this postmodern age is invited to taste and see this mysterion. A blessed marriage, experienced as such, is a martyria, a witness of joy on earth for the life of the Kingdom of God, and an epiphany of God. Truly, marriage is a great Christian mystery.