Archives for December 2009

The Noughties are nearly behind us and what better way to bring the decade to a close than by bringing you the best of the sporting quotes from the last five years.

If you missed part one (2000-2004), fear not - just click here to see it in all its glory and to see the best offerings from 2009, click here.

If part one was all about the late, great Sir Bobby Robson, in part two his protege, Jose Mourinho, comes into his own. I could have filled the whole blog with the Special One's pearls of wisdom but in order to accomodate everyone else, I've picked out three of his best.

All that remains is for me to wish you all a Happy New Year and as usual, add your quotes below, plus any ideas about what we're going to call the next decade - the Tens, Teens?

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The quotes of the decade are up - click here for part one and here for part two - but there were just so many gems this year, it seemed rude not to have a separate blog for 2009.

So here it is in all its glory - the sportsmen and women, managers and even the odd rock star, reminding us that even for long-suffering football fans like myself, sport can be fun.

As ever, please feel free to add any quotes we may have missed - or any from the Christmas period we could use next week. And a Happy New Year to you all.

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Yes folks, it's that time of year when I foolishly put my head on the block and murder a favourite Christmas carol/song of days gone by.

Last I plumped for the festive number one, Hallelujah, and while my beloved colleague and ace live texter Caroline Cheese urged me to adopt the same strategy this time, I wasn't quite sure how to incorporate '@!*$! you I won't do what you tell me' into the equation (although a few Premier League footballers spring to mind).

Anyway, so I've decided that the ditty made famous by Dean Martin - Let It Snow - should come in for the treatment this year. Dean, wherever you are, I'm truly sorry.

I'm sure I'll be receiving abuse by the bucketload, but what I really want to see are your own fair efforts. Have a wonderful Christmas and see you on the other side.

LET IT SNOW (THE 2009 SPORTY REMIX)

Oh Goliath he is so frightening
But the Hayemaker moves like lightning
Hits him with blow after blow
Hear him crow! Hear him crow! Hear him crow!

Down at City they are so choosy
Stuck the dagger right into Hughesy
"I've only lost two games you know"
Let him go! Let him go! Let him go!

Now Giggsy's a right old stager
But he's quicker than you, I'll wager
And at SPOTY, well he stole the show
What a pro! What a pro! What a pro!

Button's "World champion, baby!"
Blew a kiss to his lovely lady
To his rivals who gave it a go...
You're too slow! You're too slow! You're too slow!

The Aussies they looked a fair bet
With Ponting and Clarke both well set
Then Freddie got into his flow
What a throw! What a throw! What a throw!

So the Noughties have nearly ended
And your company's been just splendid
Merry Christmas - I love you all so
Ho ho ho! Ho ho ho! Ho ho ho!

ALTERNATIVE CAROLS FROM CHRISTMAS PAST

2002: Good King Goldenballs
2003: Jonny Christmas
2004: We Three Kings
2005: God Bless Ye Merry Gentlemen
2006: Away In A Strange Land
2007: Walking In A Hatton Wonderland
2008: Hallelujah

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It only seems like yesterday when England were hammering Germany, Jonny Wilkinson was planting 'that' kick between the posts and Roy Keane was launching into a tirade - actually that probably was only yesterday.

To mark the end of the decade, I was handed the task of trawling through the archives to collate the words of wisdom from the great and the good (and the not so great and good) of our sporting folk.

In part one we look at what was being said between 2000-2004, with the rest of the best of the decade appearing next week. So without further ado, off we go - and what more fitting way to begin than with the inimitable Bobby Robson...

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Snow on the ground, reports of a secret Christmas party, Rage Against The Machine heading for their traditional Christmas number one - yep, it's finally beginning to feel festive.

As I hit the sack on Thursday night, I felt sure I'd be awoken by 6am shouts of 'Daddy, can we build a snowman?!' but alas the predicted overnight flurries failed to materialise and I was left trying to answer a few awkward questions, all beginning with the word 'Why?'

Although perhaps not as awkward as the atmosphere at Tottenham's training ground, following allegations in The Sun that a few of the players had flown to Dublin for a knees-up, cunningly disguised as a golf trip.

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"Sometimes you've just got to go."
Former Arsenal keeper Jens Lehmann explains why he spent a penny during Stuttgart's game with Unirea Urziceni.

"It reminds me a lot of the Tour de France - sometimes you don't have any other possibility but to let it out."
Stuttgart's director of sport Horst Heldt won't be telling Lehmann to get on his bike following his indiscretion.

"Hope it all goes well - people will be surprised to know you have a heart!"
Sam Allardyce reveals the text sent to him by old mucker Kenny Dalglish before the Blackburn boss underwent minor heart surgery.

"What were you going to sing - What Becomes Of The Broken-Hearted?!"
Dalglish's response after Big Sam reveals the op meant he was unable to sing at a charity dinner.

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You all know the story - waiter delivering Champagne to George Best's hotel room finds the superstar lying on his bed with Miss World and a shedload of casino winnings. Waiter shakes his head and delivers the immortal line: "George, where did it all go wrong?"

Which kind of sums up life as a QPR fan. Bags of cash, supermodels in the stands, football from the Gods - and an accident just waiting to happen.

The latest chapter began with a 5-1 hammering by Middlesbrough and ended with our star player loitering in a public convenience at Vicarage Road, promotion aspirations seemingly down the toilet and the manager suspended amid allegations of an altercation. Even by our own sub-standards, this will take some beating.

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"I can shake hands with who I want."
Arsene Wenger defends his decision not to touch gloves with Mark Hughes following Arsenal's 3-0 League Cup defeat to Manchester City.

"At one point he questioned why I was over on his side of the technical area. He may have been a little bit aggrieved by that, but I would suggest he was more aggrieved that his team got beat."
Hughes suggests his opposite number was simply a bad loser. Surely not?

"I don't deny that I'm a bad loser but I would have done exactly the same if we had won or lost."
Then again...Wenger states his case.

"Against Stoke I mark my 500th game and I believe I have shaken hands 497 times."
And the Arsenal boss backs it up with figures.

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"I remember Elton John used to be their owner and he is my favourite singer! I hope the match will be an opportunity to meet Elton John!"
Chelsea boss Carlo Ancelotti is ready for a love-in after seeing his side draw Watford in the FA Cup.

"*@!**!@"
Arsene Wenger loses his customary cool when asked about Theo Walcott's World Cup prospects.

"When they vote for the coach of the year it doesn't seem that I'll win. Perhaps I'll even be last, or perhaps I'll have to vote for myself to get a vote."
Jose Mourinho gives the slightest hint that his love affair with Italian football may be coming to an end.

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