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Ratings
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Reviews
Gone Girl (2014)
An Innapropriate Review
So call me crazy...
But if Amy Dunne returned to me confessing her murderous plot and crazy tirades... i think i'd fall in love with her two fold. A psychopath being somewhat honest about their screwed up psyche?! Is it humanly possible to forge a more vulnerable, open relationship between two people?! A psychopath will not open up, and she KIND OFFFF just did, and it was so crazy hot! Call me delusional... But if i was Nicholas Dunne i wouldve been all over that girl. The relationship would have been on like donkey kong. Not just physically. Emotionally, mentally, intellectually. What a ride you could have with a psychopath with a bit of openness! Holy HOTT!!
This movie serves as a really interesting commentary on herd thought and media influence. That is also something important that i thought. Also this film was very well done. Just all around a good time. A rollercoaster. Great stuff.
Hit Man (2023)
7.75
I beleive this movie is being somewhat ironic.
It is about the destruction and recreation of self. The end of the film is pretty grossly immoral. The ending is absent of all virtue. Which if taken seriously, will upset you. I believe Glenn Powells lecture on moral relativism and 'be what you want to be', right after commiting an obviously objectively wrong act is a nod to what the film is getting at. The only way one justifies doing wrong is by adopting such foolish post modern ideas, like subjective morality and a subjective lived experience.
So. This film is either ironically pointing out post modern philisophical gook. Or it just inadvertently dismantled this generations entire philosophy but upsetting a group of viewers 'objective moral conscience'.
I think it was a clever film. I thought it was highly engaging and actually kinda funny. It definitley held my attention from start to finish and provided me a good night. The ending wasn't traditional... but i must believe the writers arent THAT dumb. I trust them.
Amen.
One Day (2011)
Terrible Pacing
Well im at a disadvantage watching this film after the release of the tv show. Which i gave 10/10 by the way. If you havent seen that. DO NOT WATCH THIS. GO to Netflix and watch the series. It is better on so many accounts. I actually loved it so much that i read the book. THEN i watched this.
They got a lot of things wrong with this film. The tone is off. The casting was poor... Like seriously who even is that guy playing dexter? He is a wretched actor who has no chemistry with Anne Hathaway whatsoever. It looks bland and depressing. It just doesnt have a lot going for it honestly.
What it does have going for it is an incredible story.
The problem is with such an incredible story, it is impossible to capture it in a less then two hour long film. This story takes time. The relationship takes soaking. The characters need fleshing out. This film just kind of falls flat because it doesn't take enough time with anyone or anything in particular. It is a poor book to film adaptation, focusing on the wrong sections, spending little time on character devlopment.
I mean really i believe this has got to be one of the WORST paced movies ive ever seen EVER. The pacing is just terrible. This story format DOES NOT compute to the screen. Either change up the story for a film adaptation or dont do it at all!
Gojira -1.0 (2023)
Godzilla 9!
I'm not a big monster movie guy. I've never made it through one of the Godzilla films. Ive tried watching the 2014 godzilla film like 4 times and everytime i fall asleep. I am not one for mindless destruction movies, like san andreas, rampage, 2012. Disaster movies are not my thing.
This is not a disaster movie. This is a film that packs a seriously simply yet deeply meaningful story about people & relationships. It was moving in a lot of ways. And when it was a disaster movie, it was EPIC! So well done, great VFX, great sound design. Honestly just so well done on so many different accounts. Props to Godzilla Minus One.
The Watchers (2024)
Pretty Absurd
Book to film adaptations are difficult for a lot of reasons. Books take a lot of time with a story. Words get to soak in a readers mind, characters can be fleshed out, intricate storylines can be explored over a long period of time, relationships can be eased into with flowing dialogue and a lot of different scenes.
So yeah. Eveything i just mentioned a book can do well, this film fails at pretty dramatically. You can see how one could have read this book (i have not) and see a great story, with great characters and relationships. But honestly those things take great time and are very delicate. This movie did not take its time and was in no way delicate.
The absolutely roller coaster of a plot was jammed into an hour and fourty seven minutes. No time was taken on anythhing of true substance. It was as if M. Night was just trying to paste scenes from a book on screen, while cramming in a wild storyline. AS a result, the plot is cheesy and rushed developing mostly through forced dialogue. The charecters are severely under devloped, there is a struggle to really like any of them because no time is taken to develop them. The relationships... were not even forced, just curiously appeared out of thin air.
The real problem here is the intricate plot was just driven too hard and too fast. I've said it many times in my reviews for book adaptations, the more creative liberties a film takes the better it is. Books do not translate well on screen. It must be made into something entirely different.
Points are given for its great effects, stellar ambience, and well done cinematography. Also it WAS intruiging enough for me to stay engaged from start to finish. That did not stop me from laughing at its absurdidies though.
The End of the Tour (2015)
Buzzing Along
There is something charming and beautiful about this film. It comes through lines that I assume are entirely pulled from the mouth of David Foster Wallace himself. Jason Seigel has a very noteworthy performance here playing David. He really does an awesome job, probably one of my favorites of his. The problem is that there is no story. It lacks plot on a pretty critical level. It is mostly flat and buzzes on, propelled only by the brilliant dialogue (brought to you by David himself) as a film I don't think it stands very tall. I really don't. That being said it is worth watching just to get a feel for David as a man.
Marcel the Shell with Shoes On (2021)
Surprising!
What a charming little film.
For a film about a shell it felt incredibly human! It was very relatable to the human experience, it even made me shed a tear. This movie just had no business being this good. It was darling! Just a very sweet lighthearted funny film that touch the soul in a different way! This movie accomplished something emotionally that most "human" movies fail to do! I'm speaking about humans like I'm an alien in this review... I am also a person.
Great stuff. Great look. Great vibes. Great sound.
No yeah really the soundtrack was actually very good! Super good score for some reason.
Looper (2012)
Looper face
So like why did they do that Joseph Gordon levitts face? That was very distracting. On par with justice leagues mustache debacle. But this time it played out throughout the whole film. Why not make Bruce Willis look more like Joseph? Too much screen time for the distracting looking fella! His face had my mind puzzled the whole film!
Anyways... putting that aside
This movie starts really strong. It's a really creative concept, it works as really great sci fi but feels very human. It's beautiful looking, well acted. Really not much wrong with the first half of this film. I was totally prepared to give it an 8. But halfway through the writing really lost its way. It dragged. It got muddled and stuck at a farm, with a story the first half of the film didn't promise.
Bob Marley: One Love (2024)
Nothing About This Works
I think this movie is a huge failure, so many things went wrong. Everything from casting to writing was pretty much a disaster.
This film just did not know what it wanted to be. It is not a biopic on the rise of bob marley. It is not a biopic of his final days. It is not centered around any particular relationships, concerts or album for that matter. It is just a jumbled up mess up scenes. At the end of the film when documentary footage of bob marley plays you realize how VERY manufactered and fake this film is. You realize how poor it is and what a missed opprotunity this is in highlighting a great man, and great musicians life. Just does not sit right in any way.
The Contestant (2023)
Ying & Yang
A lot of the reviews here point out the sheer insanity of the nature of the game. Nasubi did endure a level of hell and suffering that many of us will never taste. Japan laughed at him for it. This documentary is grossly tragic. Watching it, my jaw literally dropped to the floor. It does a serious job of depicting the sheer evil in man, the evil in human relationships.
This alone would make the contestant a great documentary.
What really deals the deal is the last 30 minutes. The switch is flipped and we get a look at what it means to be a good man. We see pure love play out in a broken man's heart. We come to see how to deal with suffering in a healthy and productive way. No. We learn how to deal with suffering in THE ONLY way. Love. The end of this doco had me in tears.
People are not mentioning that. But it's what makes this documentary TRULY great. The ying and yang depiction of hate/love good/evil.
Almost Famous (2000)
Very surprised
Ya know this movie actually really took me by surprise. I really enjoyed it through and through, I was prepared to give it a lower score because to me it felt like it lacked a little direction. But by the end of it the whole thing really fell into place. It's a highly original film that works as a phenomenal period piece on the seventies rock scene. It made me laugh quite a bit as well! Which is worth noting. Just a really well done highly engaging movie. Also what's her name... Kate Hudson was a real doll in the late 90s! They really casted this film well. Where has Jason Lee gone? I miss him and my name is earl.
Se7en (1995)
A Disgusting Masterpiece
This is a very dark and disturbing film. It is an incredible thriller that creates a city atmosphere that makes Gotham look like Provo Utah. I mean this film just pulled off a miracle in the atmosphere department. I would like to say- David if you are reading this, you need help. See a therapist. You got issues. The lates 90s were not his years mentally, but his sick twisted mind shines through in his art masterfully!
A serious masterpiece though. Fantastic in all departments. So unpredictable and engaging I was in the edge of my seat from start to finish. Truly a disgusting little masterpiece.
Due Date (2010)
Eye roll
I was honestly just really bored with this film. It fits the mold of the late 2000s Hangover era comedy. Although I don't reckon it fits it well. The characters are static and uninteresting. Robert Disney's character is an intolerable pr*ck of a main character. His character arc is a real head scratcher in this film. Not much of an arc... more like a spike. Anyway comedies of this nature aren't to be under such heavy scrutiny... but I wouldn't even say it holds its own as a comedy. It provided little laughs. Although I did find myself smiling most of the way through. This film did not do it for me. Found myself rolling my eyes more then I was laughing.
Anyone But You (2023)
Sydney Sweenmaster
Sydney Sweeney and what's his face embark on a love quest, a predictable one at that, one with a few laughs and atrocious acting. I mean seriously... Sydney Sweeney may be attractive but she is genuinely a horrible actress. What's his face top gun isn't bad but with Sydney Sweeney as his costar it just cannot work. She is really bad. Kills any feeling romance. That being said I shouldn't like this film, but I kind of did. Dang it. It was enjoyable, and even though I knew what was going to happen it was still enjoyable to watch happen. It's worth a watch if you enjoy romcoms. Don't expect much from the sweenmaster though.
Insomnia (2002)
Nolan's Debut
Insomnia may be directed by Christopher Nolan- but it definitely wasn't WRITTEN by him. His Hollywood debut as a director makes him shine. The film is well done no doubt about it, the problem is the source material. The story is pretty predictable, the dialogue is cheesy and the supporting plots fit obscurely. It finished, I shrugged my shoulders and said "that was good." But I didn't like it. Nothing to go crazy for. A well done film with an engaging story but left me feeling ethically dirty and dark. I mean wow this film aroused some emotions in me that I simply DID NOT like to feel. But then again well done.
The Virgin Suicides (1999)
Iron Claw 4girls
It leads you on a journey with its innate quirkiness, and off handed levity. The journey is mostly incredibly unsatisfying, and aggravating. Next to me on my airplane was my buddy watching iron claw. I realized we were watching the same story play out but in its opposite. Weird. I didn't love iron claw for its broodiness, but gave it grace because it was compelling-somewhat redeeming- beautiful and great characters. This film had none of those things. Nothing was felt for any character. Nothing about its story was redeemable. And it was most importantly not super compelling... I caught the quirk though and somewhat enjoyed it. But overall it's a no from me.
Memento (2000)
Remember Sammy Jenkis
Can't believe it's taken me this long to see this film. I was always daunted by its concept- watching a movie happening backwards did NOT sound enjoyable... but holy cow what an interesting suspenseful experience it was! I felt like I was putting together a puzzle the whole time. A really brilliant thrilling puzzle with twists and turns! A truly innovative creative film pulled off perfectly.
Great performances. Great production design. Great writing. Just a perfectly simply done execution of an overly complex film. One of my favorite Christopher Nolan flicks!
Brilliant stuff!
Would be interested to see someone edit the film in chronological order.
Civil War (2024)
6.5 for Effort
Yeah. So I understand what A24 is getting at with most of their films. They try hard to be thought provoking, in some sense they are anti Hollywood; in that everything they do they speak directly to the audience about some seemingly pressing issue. They are yet to release a mind numbing entertaining blockbuster. The problem is, they marketed this film as such. They made it look like a serious epic about the details of a civil war in America. And although there are some epic, suspenseful scenes it is NOT that kind of movie.
The film revolves around a group of journalists traveling across the states. Along the way we learn lessons through watching them. We learn little from watching the people of the states, but we do learn from watching the journalists. This film really serves as a commentary about the state of journalism and the desensitization of America. I don't think it succeeds in the carry out of its message. It's muddled with bad writing, often awkward performances and its divided nature. I mean this film just didn't know what it wanted to be- an epic war film or a melo drama on journalism. It doesn't majorly succeed in either way... but it does succeed enough to GET THE MESSAGE and BE ENTERTAINED. It's an awkward half step in another direction for A24.
It almost works.
Worth a watch overall.
Also it's worth noting that this film is really beautiful at parts and the sound effects are really on point.
The Royal Tenenbaums (2001)
Too much for me
I get it. I do. I could enjoy this movie under the right circumstances. It's very Wes Anderson. Peak of his style. The problem I find is that it's very style over substance. Just not much happens here. The story isn't terribly interesting, the characters aren't very hashed. It's intriguing, by the very nature of it being a Wes Anderson film. His artistic style and interplay with visual symbolism as a means of story telling is something worth paying attention too. The problem is the story wasn't interesting enough to make me invest more attention to the detail. Under better circumstances I may have had a better experience but walking away from this film I felt I enjoyed the Darjeeling unlimited a bit more.
Land of Bad (2024)
Tries too hard
It tries really really hard to be thought provoking. Unfortunately the bad cheesy writing, poor production design, Hollywood glorification and cleanliness of war makes it fall flat from any emotional weight or feeling of serious levitates. I mean seriously Liam Hemsworth took a jack hammer to the face and nothing even happened, the man walked away from a missile strike. After being tortured and bombed he was just as handsome as he was eating those cornflakes in the beginning of the film ;) Poorly written. Poorly executed. There's not much more for me to say here about this film. It just tries really too hard that it's somewhat embarrassing.
The Fall Guy (2024)
Smile Inducing
Fall Guy is a really fun entertaining, smile inducing film. Its got great stunts, awesome action sequences. It's really over the top, and ridiculous at times. Luckily the film is somewhat self aware of its own ridiculousness, so i am weary calling the film cheesy. But it definitely walks that line. It works better as a satirical take on action heavy Hollywood flicks than it does as a romantic comedy. In fact I would say the film fails in the romance department, any romance (or emotion for that matter) is grossly overshadowed by its own 'epicness'. This is clearly a love letter to stunt men and women, it works mostly... the problem is that it doesn't take itself seriously enough for its audience to take it seriously. It was fun, it is definitely worth a watch.
Tropic Thunder (2008)
Minty Fresh
Just a really fun hilarious deeply creative and refreshing movie. I mean for something to be refreshing is to be authentic and acknowledge its own faults. This movie- as a movie- is making fun of movies- and this movie. Its a upside down joy! I remember the first time watching it being deeply confused by the commercials at the beggining thinking it was actually real movie trailers. ITs just so well done and such a good satire about the film industry. Also i mean, how the heck did theuy come up with this! Its to clever! Great stuff really. Every character hits the nail on the head. The writing is just mint. Mint!
Dodgeball: A True Underdog Story (2004)
One good Laugh
Dear lord this has aged like gramma sycamores bread. I find this film in the shanty dark cupboard, a steaming green stinky mess. I mean really... did people REALLY used to find this funny? Cause it is so NOT funny now. I laughed once. Cringed the rest.
I mean come on... did a second grader write this? The jokes are so poorly written and feel so unnatural. Whatever humor this used to play too is long dead. Vince Vaughn i typically find hilrious. Ben Stiller i find hialrious... and found him somewhat funny in this movie... But still so painful. Everything about this was so painful.
I mean come on really? A pirate playing dodgeball? Average Joes gym? With wacky characters. What the heck is this movie.
The Usual Suspects (1995)
Intricate to a fault?
This is an intricate film. Kind of hard to follow. There is a whole lot of name dropping, name dropping that just served to clutter the story, cause chaos. There may be purpose in this, as there is an ambiguity that persists til the ending- which is a marvelous bow tie to the end of the story.
Its an enjoyable watch. Made me feel a little stupid. But it was fun. A fine look at the state of cinema in the 90's. Movies surely felt a bit different.
Um
kevin spacey is good
the other guys are good... lol
the story is a little convoluted
I unfortunately knew the ending, so it wasnt much of a surprise. ALthought it was great, the whole film i knew where it was leading and going. This probably effected my viewing experience.
Waves (2019)
Dumpster Fire of Tragedy
The road to hell is steep, and inadvertently brings others down with you.
This movie is tuff. It is a drama through and through. Infact it is not just tragedy, it is a dumpster fire depiction of life. A redeemable dumpster fire.
It's and A24 film so it shoots for the stars in a lot of ways. It lands in most. It's got seriously great cinematography and color grading. All the performances are really great- bar Alexa Demie (she is not good, she unfortunately kills the tone with some of her scenes). The sound design is honestly otherworldly- this film mustve been edited by an eccentric young videographer, because the pacing (especially in the beggining) tagged on with the sound design is honestly otherworldly. It plays out like a really fleshed out instagram reel. A weird thing to say, but it works and its awesome. The sound design in this film deserves an oscar. The editing makes this movie as well. Not to mention the music choice. They really just nailed the vibes on this film.
With great vibes and a compelling story that had me audibly gawfing at the screen, this movie is a must see! It also teaches some important life lessons, and reminds man to bear his cross and be patient.