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Reviews
Succession (2018)
SUCCESSion.
'Succession (2018-2023)' is nothing short of a masterpiece. Seriously, it's one of the best shows I've ever had the pleasure of watching. One of the main reasons I'm so confident in declaring it one of the all-time greats is that it's incredibly consistent. Where most shows drag their heels to the point things start to get stale or - perhaps even more common - stumble in their final seasons (even if they're good, they're rarely as good as the others), this simply refuses to succumb to that issue. It's as good as, if not better than, it's ever been as it heads towards its final episode, and not a single solitary second ever even threatens to disappoint you. This is top-tier stuff from start to finish.
The dynastic show depicts the Roy family and its response to its patriarch's decision not to step down what many people, including his children, think he should. It's like we're watching some sort of modern historical epic, except the Roy empire is a business and their power is purely money (and vice versa). It's almost Shakespearean, a tragedy of near biblical proportions that feels like a less stabby version of 'Game Of Thrones (2011-2019)'. Throughout the show, alliances form and dissolve, motivations shift, power corrupts, and betrayals cut deep. It evolves massively over time, somehow striking a balance between comedy and drama that reaches the highest of highs and the lowest of lows without ever feeling tonally jarring. It's sometimes hilarious, sometimes devastating and always utterly compelling. The writing is seriously impressive, not least of all because it's able walk such a tonal tightrope and make it look easy. It often puts you on the edge of your seat, twisting your stomach with anxiety as it lets its awkward situations unflinchingly play out, but it also makes you fall to the floor laughing.
The characters are all really complex, each of them developing massively over the course of the four seasons. Their likability ebbs and flows, always keeping you on your toes as to which of these awful people you're actually rooting for, and but their intricacy remains steady. They feel like living, breathing people with flaws and weaknesses and strengths and desires. The actors bring them to life flawlessly. Honestly, this is some of the best acting I've ever seen in my life. Pretty much all the main players are absolutely amazing, but special mention must go to Brian Cox, Matthew
Matthew Macfadyen, Kieran Culkin, Sarah Snook (who might just take the crown for the best non-verbal acting of all time, although she has some stiff competition in her cast mates) and - last but not least - Jeremy Strong. Their ability to inhabit their characters and often convey their deepest thoughts and emotions without a single word is staggering. It helps that the writing gives them so much to work with and is never content with spoon-feeding backstory to the audience, which makes the moments that you can discern (primarily through performance) all the more satisfying.
The show focuses on billionaires typically doing terrible things to each other and to the world. It's not as simple as good and bad, though, and this level of challenge is really thrilling. The show has sharp satirical elements that are subtle but ever present. It immerses you in this world of rich jerks giving no thought to the people they hurt in the name of profit, surrounding us with their contemptable beliefs and actions, but it never feels like it's condoning their attitude. It's quite often making fun of them in the same breath it's presenting them in a grounded and honest fashion. It maintains an underlying criticism of these kinds of people, cutting to the harsh reality surrounding their existence, but it doesn't do so at the expense of character. It's actually a really empathetic show in that regard, even though it can also be really cruel.
Ultimately, I can't express just how fantastic this show is. It's absolutely phenomenal in pretty much every way possible, capable of splitting your sides mere moments before it rips your heart out of your chest. It's an enthralling experience that's as funny as it is affecting, as witty as it is emotionally shattering. It's truly one of the best shows of all time. I wish there was more of it, but I also appreciate the fact that it isn't dragged out. It's consistently excellent. It's one of the easiest recommendations I've ever made. If you haven't seen it, do so as soon as possible.
Thelma (2024)
Sans Louise.
'Thelma (2024)' is an utter delight. I watched almost the entire thing, save for the purposefully sad parts, with a beaming grin plastered across my face. Seriously, my cheeks hurt by the time the credits rolled around. This wholesome little picture is like a warm hug, a gentle pinch on the cheek. It's consistently funny - very funny - but it's also really poignant, making some quite profound statements about ageing and maintaining independence and learning to accept that it's okay to ask for help. It's a very honest picture that feels true to life in its representation of something not often seen on the big screen. It puts you in the shoes of its older protagonist - played by a delightful June Squibb, who's in her early-to-mid nineties and still performs most of her own stunts here (more on that later) - and features many moments that will be recognisable to anyone with grandparents. The core relationship is between grandson and grandma, even though they don't actually share all that much time on screen, and their dynamic is really sweet. They mirror each other in key ways, too, with both of them feeling boxed-in by their overprotective familial link (mother and father/ daughter and son-in-law). The lesson the grandson learns is, essentially, to trust his grandma more, and she in turn learns not to resent his concern. It's not about one caring for the other, it's about them meeting in the middle to understand that their ages - young and old - don't make them any less capable. It's a very empathetic picture that makes a point of portraying the elderly first and foremost as people, something which sounds incredibly basic but is actually a bit of a blind spot when it comes to Hollywood. It's not just a pity party - in fact, far from it - but it is really effective at making you feel sorry for some of its characters and the way society treats them (particularly during the scam that kicks off the eponymous hero's journey). It does this without feeling patronising, or like it's cheaply trying to make you cry. It's as earnest in its saddest moments as it is in its happiest, remaining genuine from its first frame to its last. Despite its realistic downbeat moments, it's an overwhelmingly positive piece on the whole, one that that leaves you feeling better than it found you. It's very clearly a project filled with passion on the part of everyone involved, and that passion seeps through the screen; it's infectious. Everything about it is just so cosy and pleasant.
June Squibb is absolutely fabulous here. I can't believe it's taken this long for her to land a leading role, or - perhaps more accurately - for a filmmaker to truly recognise her talents. She's fantastic, hitting her comedic and dramatic beats with equal elegance, and she's also somewhat of an action star. Of course, you have to temper your expectations as to what an action star is considering that this action star happens to be a nonagenarian (and that the flick itself isn't really an action movie, just one that slyly twists the formula of one to its own delightfully warm-hearted ends). Set to the tune of a funky, flute-heavy score reminiscent of something out of a heist film, the picture portrays its protagonist's odyssey of independence in an effortlessly entertaining and engaging way. Squibb genuinely impresses with daring feats such as riding a mobility scooter, climbing a flight of stairs, navigating knee-heigh obstacles, retrieving something from the top of a wardrobe, rolling over a sofa bed (?), getting up off the ground, and even firing a gun (the most traditional of all these moments). To be honest, it's admirable she's able to walk down the street as briskly as she does. It may sound like I'm being flippant, but I assure you I'm not; this is sincerely first-rate stuff from Squibb. Although this is definitely her film, the supporting cast are also great. Richard Roundtree turns in gentle but formidable work, Fred Hechinger strikes a balance between cheeky and conscientious, and Parker Posey and Clark Gregg are almost too convincing as their anxiety-ridden, unintentionally controlling characters. There's also a bit of a surprise appearance from a certain someone who is credited in the opening titles but is nevertheless reserved for the final movement, and it goes without saying that he's enjoyable in his divertingly disagreeable role. The feature is heartfelt and generally quite profound, but it also knows when to wink at the audience and feels very playful. The direction strikes a keen balance between the comedy and the drama, making sure the humour never encroaches on the poignance but is also never absent for too long. Everything is shot with simple but effective choreography (the nighttime scenes, in particular, look really nice) and edited in a zippy yet measured fashion. It's really solid from a technical point of view.
The movie doesn't have many flaws, and most of them are pretty superficial. One thing that stood out to me is that the central scam doesn't feel all that financially impactful for the protagonist. Although the money isn't really the point (it's about feeling duped and wanting to prove you're still capable, despite making a mistake anyone could have made), I feel as though the flick could have made this element more apparent in order to generate more concern for the character and hammer home the fact that scams like this happen to older people all the time because they're specifically targeted by bad people wanting to make money off their inexperience and (hopefully) kind-hearted nature. This really isn't a massive issue at all, though, and it's only something that occurred to me in retrospect when analysing the affair. This truly is a wonderful, wonderful movie that's entertaining from start to finish. I meant what I said about smiling all the way through. It's hilarious, affecting, silly, sincere, well-made and welcoming. It's surprisingly deep and keenly reflects aspects of reality not often showcased in cinema, while also retaining its own bouncy identity and healthy sense of humour. It's a lovely little picture that made me want to hug my grandma and reminded me just how truly thankful I am that I still can. It's simply sublime and is easily one of the year's best efforts.
Twisters (2024)
Twist an' shout!
As someone who has neither seen, nor has any real interest in seeing, 'Twister (1996)', 'Twisters (2024)' is perhaps the perfect kind of sequel insofar as it isn't really a sequel at all. Sure, it has a very similar name and a similar premise, but you can't exactly copyright the weather; this could have been a stand-alone storm-chaser blockbuster (perhaps even with the same title). Of course, adding an "S" to the end of the name of a nineties disaster movie and calling it a franchise flick is a half-hearted yet effective marketing trick meant to get more bums in seats by cashing in on the recent trend of legacy sequels. It may sound cynical, but it's entirely true. However, I'm actually glad the picture does that bare minimum to tie itself to its predecessor, and I'm not even mad that it leverages it to catapult itself to blockbuster status by default. After all, as sad as it may be, it's unlikely that this sort of movie would get made with this kind of budget nowadays if it wasn't based on a pre-existing property. In a way, it's a semi-original tentpole picture, and that feels refreshing in an industry that treats IP as currency and relegates original fare to limited releases or - worse still - streaming platforms. That's not to imply that this isn't exactly what you'd expect it to be, nor that it's "original" by any real definition of the term. The likelihood that this wasn't dreamt up in a studio boardroom as a precise calculation of how to make as much money as possible by mining nostalgia from already-owned content is very slim. Yet, there is a sense that the filmmakers have somehow managed to game the system and make their tornado film exactly how they want to make it with the only small artistic concession being that it's called 'Twisters (2024)' (which, incidentally, is what it's all about).
The movie itself is, by all accounts, really solid. In many ways, it's just what you want from something like it. It doesn't go above and beyond, transcending its template to become something incredibly exciting or unexpectedly moving, but it also doesn't do things by half, emerging as soulless studio shlock with nothing to hold onto other than the headache it leaves you with. One of its greatest strengths is its ability to make all its ridiculous visual effects seem genuinely grounded within its world. Although it obviously relies heavily on CGI, the seams between that created in a computer and that captured in camera are far less noticeable than you may anticipate. Even at its biggest, it always feels tangible and convincingly conveys the utter devastation that occurs in the wake of its eponymous meteorological marvels. This wind feels dangerous, and - even though it's undeniably silly when characters refer to tornadoes in a vaguely anthropomorphized fashion as if they're some kind of slasher hunting them down in the night ("don't let it take me!") - the picture does a compelling job of showcasing the consequences that come when mother nature just decides to do its thing no matter who it has to kill to do it. The picture does manage to convey the beauty of tornadoes, as well, and this allows the audience to share in the wonder its most enthusiastic character experience every time they see one. The visuals are made all the more effective by the flick's excellent sound design. The audio makes deft use of surround sound to put you right there in the field with its chasers, allowing you to literally feel the wind whip past your ears as it builds and builds until it's capable of destroying entire cities. It's not just during the loud moments where this is noticeable, but also during the quiet ones where characters contemplate which direction is most likely to produce the required environment for a tornado to form. As an experience, the film ticks all the required boxes for it to be considered essential big-screen viewing (in the sense that it really won't feel the same on your television). While its narrative does have some downfalls, there's little to grumble about in terms of its technical execution - bar, perhaps, some occasionally slightly jarring editing.
The piece's most prominent problem is that it's simply too long for its own good. It continues to one-up itself, getting to the point where you're almost numb to its increasingly spectacular weather formations simply due to sheer overexposure to them. The pacing is a little off, with quite a hefty lull just before the third act that takes the wind out of the story's sails and a somewhat repetitive midsection that all needs to be there but feels a little clumsy nevertheless. As a whole, there isn't really that much to the narrative. It splits itself into three distinct parts, but its second segment is further split and is stretched just slightly beyond what's comfortable considering there's a whole gear shift ahead of it. The third act is so big that it needs to be preceded by a calm before the storm, but the second act is so hefty that there's no real time for it; the film's solution is to essentially extend its runtime and, as I mentioned earlier, come to a crawl to semi-artificially add the needed breathing room in the build up to its finale. The character work contains no surprises, but it's all entirely dependable and it does exactly what it needs to: gets you to care about its core players just enough that you don't want to see them get yanked into a giant tunnel of wind. Some of them undergo rudimentary development that isn't anything special but still appreciated. I really enjoy how Daisy Edgar-Jones' lead is allowed to fully take the reins, increasingly so as the affair heads towards its climax. It very much feels like she's the main focus and the others are there to support her, as interesting as they are in their own right, which makes her actions in the last set-piece all the more rewarding. There is a romantic aspect that the picture is bizarrely shy about, always pulling back before fully establishing it and not in a "will they, won't they?" kind of way. It's just really strange to include if they're not going to commit to it, and it feels entirely perfunctory. I actually prefer the Edgar-Jones/ Anthony Ramos pairing to the Edgar-Jones/ Glen Powell one the piece tries to push in its back half. A smaller gripe is that it gets somewhat ridiculous how a couple of the characters have a sort of sixth sense for when and where a tornado is going to show, and the constant "cool" science talk starts to be a little alienating - or, at least, grating - after a while. (I have no idea how accurate any of it is). Still, these issues are all smoothed over by the strength of the performances. Edgar-Jones is as sturdy as a rock in the lead role, feeling as though she could do this in her sleep. Powell has an undeniable charisma that works best when he's allowed to just do his thing and (seemingly) not think too hard about it; he has a kind of less-egotistical Dwayne Johnson appeal to him. Ramos brings a more earthy and complex vibe to his character, but he's no less at home. The supporting cast all do well with the material they have, too.
The feature is quite a bit of fun when everything's working in its favour. Despite its really generic set up and lack of any real emotional impact (not to mention significant thematic elements), it eventually becomes the sort of enjoyably easy watch that's surprisingly difficult to achieve. It's much better than could have been. While it's only ever so compelling and everything other than the in-the-moment chasing feels slightly sub-par (at least comparatively), it's an entertaining effort that does what it needs to and does it well. It isn't great, but it's good.
Huang jia shi jie (1985)
I didn't expect so much Strepsil, Asprin and Panadol...
'Yes, Madam! (1985)' is a little disappointing because it's billed as a Michelle Yeoh/ Cynthia Rothrock action movie, but most of its runtime is dedicated to three bumbling thieves. It doesn't help that only about fifteen minutes of it is actually comprised of action, which makes the movie far less energetic and exciting than it could - and should - have been. That's not to imply that the set-pieces aren't spectacular when they do occur, just that they're far less frequent than they ought to be. To be fair, that's not necessarily true; with a more compelling story, the frequency of the fights wouldn't be an issue. It's just that most of the narrative isn't exactly compelling, and the occasional burst of enjoyable action isn't enough to raise the overall quality of the picture beyond that of its least kinetic moments. Still, it's not like the flick is ever unenjoyable, rather that it's only ever so enjoyable. Its unremarkably decency is, if nothing else, entirely consistent. It has a handful of funny moments, some entertaining ass-kicking and two absolute stars at its centre. It's a shame that Yeoh and Rothrock don't get more to do, particularly on the physical side of things, because they're really great when they do get time to shine. The finale, in particular, is fantastic. As is often the case with these kinds of movies, the most bonkers stuff is saved for the third act and it's glorious. There's an amazing moment where Yeoh leaps onto a balcony and does something I don't think I've ever seen before (and can't quite describe). Rothrock is really good at kicking people in all manner of ways, rapidly roundhousing her foes and making us smile in the process. The duo really are great at kicking butt and taking names and it's a blast whenever they're allowed to do it. It's a real shame that isn't all that often. The feature as a whole is good, but not great. Its story is somewhat repetitive, its side characters aren't all that compelling and its music is downright distracting (it sometimes uses music ripped straight from 'Halloween (1978)' of all things!). However, its infrequent action is superb, its comedy is often successful and its colourful aesthetic is enjoyable. It's a mixed bag, for sure, but it emerges as an entertaining action flick with a couple of stand-out set-pieces and two underused but electric actors at its centre.
Eileen (2023)
Eileen towards saying it's not as good as it could have been.
'Eileen (2023)' is simply too slight for its own good. By the time it feels like it's getting going, it's over. That's not to imply that it doesn't have its beguiling charms, just that it feels as though it's building to something that happens so late it can't have the consequences it deserves. The narrative is structured around a late-game pull of the rug that would work far better if the piece didn't telegraph it - or, at least, something similar to it - so heavily earlier on, which makes for a picture that only really has one major surprise and doesn't have the time to see it through to its end. I'm being vague so as to avoid spoilers, but hopefully I'm making sense. Although the music sometimes clashes with it, the purposefully muted 1960s throwback aesthetic is satisfying and distinct. The measured pacing lends itself nicely to a story which focuses primarily on loneliness, too. Thomasin Mackenzie delivers a meek yet intriguing central performance, while Anne Hathaway leverages her unique charisma to bring an air of mystery to her light-in-a-dark-room role. Shea Wigham is really sturdy as the eponymous character's abusive, alcoholic father, and Marin Ireland really impresses in a small yet significant role that must have been really emotionally draining. This is a well-made movie overall, but it just feels like it's lacking something. It's hard to put your finger on exactly what that is, yet the feeling that something is amiss remains until its credits role. With a bit more meat on its bones, it could have been really good. As it is, it's a decent effort that stands out the most when it comes to the rock-solid work of its actors.
Good Morning, Vietnam (1987)
Vietnam killed the radio star.
'Good Morning, Vietnam (1987)' is mostly a vehicle for Robin Williams' particular brand of fast-talking, impression-heavy comedy. The legendary actor reportedly ad-libbed all the radio shows his character DJs, which is easy to believe considering how closely the talents of the star and his on-screen persona align. If you're a fan of Williams, you'll likely find quite a lot to like here. Unfortunately, I don't actually find most of his schtick all that funny in this context; he's a great actor and is really funny in other films, but this just doesn't land for me and I'm not sure exactly why. It's as though it's because a lot of it is at the expense of other races, sexualities and cultures (which obviously isn't going to get me chuckling), as even the entirely inoffensive elements aren't particularly appealing to me. There's something just off about it, I guess. This is a bit of an issue considering how much time is dedicated to watching his character take command of the US airways and broadcast his banter across Vietnam, and the first movement is pretty difficult to digest if you can't quite get on its wavelength. Thankfully, though, the likeable characters and generally good-natured vibe of the picture eventually break their way through this barrier, and it becomes fairly enjoyable in its own laid-back way. It has an underlying anti-war message that's sometimes clumsily handled but is ultimately welcome (even if it's a little too light). To be fair, the flick manages to catch you off guard with the brutality of its focal conflict on more than one occasion, and these moments are almost certainly the its most potent. It does feel a bit messy in the way it weaves its loose narrative with its equally loose theming, and it includes a late-game reveal that feels like something out of an entirely different movie, but it keeps hold of its overarching identity and is relatively cohesive on the whole. In the end, this is a decent, if underwhelming, effort with a commanding central performance (even if it doesn't quite win me over in the way it's intended to) and a generally rock-solid execution. It's good, but not great.
Anyone But You (2023)
Anything but this!
No, it's not that bad. In fact, it's fine. That's kind of the problem, though. Loosely based on Shakespeare's 'Much Ado About Nothing', 'Anyone But You (2023)' is a perfectly serviceable rom-com starring two popular hotties who don't really have all that much chemistry even during the moments in which they aren't semi-playfully insulting one another due to a simple misunderstanding (which is strange considering how good they are together in the movie's press material). To be fair, there are moments in which the duo's dynamic pops just enough to make their supposed spark believable, and these scenes are clearly the picture's most enjoyable. It's just that there's always something in-between them, this intangible sense that they aren't destined for one another - or even particularly good together - no matter how strongly the story tries to convince you they are. It doesn't help that I recently watched 'Hit Man (2023)', which features a much stronger performance from Glen Powell (I've also seen Sydney Sweeney do better work) and a much more charismatic central relationship; it makes this film look totally sexless by comparison, and it isn't even marketed primarily as a rom-com. That's kind of the main issue for me, even though I'm sure everyone is trying their best. It's not like Powell and Sweeney are bad, but they just don't have that zest that the best rom-com pairings do. The supporting performances are all decent, with a couple of the side characters having some enjoyable moments that actually outshine some of the more substantial plot points. The narrative moves quickly enough that you're never bored, even if you're never exactly enthralled, and there's a kind of comfort that comes with its predictability. Unfortunately, the film isn't very romantic and it isn't very funny; it's middling in both aspects. Due to its fairly weak writing, it's Due to its fairly weak writing, it's difficult to buy into the more straightforwardly sentimental sequences, especially since the flick establishes itself as a bit of a sardonic poke at the genre in its set-up and marketing. Furthermore, some of these scenes are quite cringeworthy, perhaps because they tend to feel rather ingenuine. Despite these issues, I can see how you'd be able to have a good time with this. It's the sort of inconsequential, mildly amusing, eventually sappy fluff that's as easy to watch as it is to forget. There's definitely a target audience for this sort of thing and I imagine they'll have a decent amount of fun with it. Personally, it's just a bit too mediocre for me to recommend. It's on the cusp of being good, but it doesn't make a lasting impact. It's not bad, but it's also not great. It's fine.
Hit Man (2023)
Dis guy's (as) a hit, man!
'Hit Man (2023)' is more about lies than murders, focusing on a part-time undercover cop who partakes in sting operations intended to catch people trying to hire contract killers. Partially based on a true-story, the picture sees its protagonist juggle multiple personalities when he falls in love with one of his would-be clients and decides to keep seeing her in character. Trying to fake it until he makes it, the phony killer embarks on a steamy romance that clearly can't last forever... can it? It's perhaps not surprising that a movie directed by Richard Linklater isn't an action-packed thriller, even if it is named after an assassin; I'm glad this Netflix original doesn't go down the route implied by its generic title. It's a shame that this didn't get a cinematic release, as it feels like something that would be at home on the big screen and is likely going to fade into obscurity far faster than it otherwise would have thanks solely to its straight-to-streaming status. It's probably one of Netflix's better efforts, even if all they contributed to it was the $20 million required to buy its distribution rights. Although it takes a while for its pieces to fall into place, everything eventually clicks in a satisfying final third. Though the narrative is a little messy and the picture comes to a close just when it feels as though its third act is starting, it's generally fun and engaging enough to overcome its issues. A lot of it relies on the genuine chemistry between its two stars, with both Glen Powell and Adria Arjona bouncing off each other in amusing and sexy ways. Powell also excels during the more broad moments which involve his character donning a silly little disguise, chewing the scenery as someone playing someone else. Ultimately, this is an entertaining and unconventional romantic comedy that's never quite what you expect, even if some of its twists aren't as revelatory as they may sound on paper (although that may just be because I was anticipating a twist in the first place). Although it's a tad too long and its ending is a little rushed, it typically gets more and more enjoyable the longer it goes on. It's a solid effort that should keep you engaged throughout.
Longlegs (2024)
Now we know how those people in 'Dream Scenario' felt when Nic Cage stalked their nightmares...
The effective marketing for 'Longlegs (2024)' has made a point of not showing Nicholas Cage, and - while I think there's definitely a risk that it overhypes his transformation just a tad - I'm really glad it doesn't. His first in-character appearance in the picture is suitably alarming and genuinely quite unsettling. While I feel it gets less creepy as it unfolds (although that may just be a combination of you settling into its unnerving atmosphere and the film necessarily becoming less enigmatic as its ominous events occur, rather than any actual failing on the part of the filmmakers), the same can be said for the majority of the affair. I don't scare particularly easily, but there are segments of this that certifiably get under my skin and crawl around. I'd even go so far as to say it's not only frightening, it's one of the more frightening horror movies I've seen in recent memory. Of course, I don't intend to overplay its affect on me; I have a pretty thick skin after all. It's just that I have to acknowledge when a film feels genuinely scary in one way or another because it simply doesn't happen all that often. I don't want to dive too deeply into the experience because it really doesn't go where I expected it to, even if it does eventually rely on some reveals that are more straightforward than you may imagine. With its dread-soaked atmosphere, confidently idiosyncratic direction, compelling performances (Maika Monroe is sublime), and mercilessly uncanny feel, the picture keeps you engaged from the very moment it begins. It's all just a little bit off, just a little bit wrong, and that really gives it an almost insidious effect, with its on-screen evils constantly threatening to seep out of the frame itself. It's a captivating affair that's as thrilling as it is disconcerting, as engrossing as it is eerie. Its power only grows the further away you get from it. I'm still thinking about it, and I like it more and more with each passing moment. It totally eclipses its few flaws (including the fact that its eponymous villain is arguably given just a little too much screen time considering he's at his most effective when his very absence is the thing that most cruelly dominates the frame and those within it) and emerges as a distinct effort with a deft execution. I can't wait to watch it again, which isn't something I say all that often. It's a spine-tingling, bone-chilling, wholly entertaining horror picture. It's really good.
And, yes, it has just occurred to me that I watched this on the 14th...
Ultraman: Rising (2024)
Two Ultramen and a Baby.
'Ultraman: Rising (2024)' is an animated adventure about a baseball player who reluctantly returns to Japan to take on the mantle of Ultraman when his father becomes injured and can no longer fulfil the role. The man's struggles to balance the two halves of his life are further complicated when he must shelter and care for an infant Kaiju who the ruthless Kaiju Defence Force want to capture for nefarious purposes. At two hours in length, the picture is too long for its own good. It's never especially boring or overly drawn out, but there's a sense that it isn't as zippy as it should be. It's fairly enjoyable even during its least compelling segments, but it's the sort of thing that would be more entertaining if it was tightened up a little bit. Generally speaking, it's a perfectly decent effort. It isn't all that compelling and it has this strange, almost made-for-TV sheen that's likely a result of it being a Netflix original. That's not to say it's unsuccessful, just that it never quite feels like a real movie. Still, it's fairly fun on occasion and is visually vibrant throughout. Although some of its designs are a little odd (although I can't quite put my finger on why), its animation is lively and suitably stylised. It has a few engaging set-pieces and a decent emotional through line. Although some elements of its plot aren't explored as deeply as they ought to be and, generally speaking, its narrative is a little messy, the piece has a solid understanding of what it wants to do and it does it reasonably well. I'm not particularly enthusiastic about any of it, but it's good enough for what it is and sometimes that's just fine.
In a Violent Nature (2024)
Playing hooky from death.
Essentially a 'Friday The 13th' fan film with an artier title, 'In A Violent Nature (2024)' takes its genre and inverts it by putting us squarely in the perspective of its killer. It follows the formula of a very specific type of slasher pretty much to a tee, revelling in the little details that make it feel like the sequel to something that would've thrived at horror conventions, but it does so while putting its camera in a different location. The victims who usually take up most of the screen time in movies like this are placed at the edges of the frame or on the other side of windows, put where the villain is typically positioned in those same movies. We experience the characters' dynamics and conflicts as the killer would, overhearing them as fragmented and inessential pieces of filler in the grim narrative they're unaware they play a part in. The grounded, no-frills aesthetic combines with the unashamedly measured pacing to plant you in a world that feels less heightened than you're accustomed to with films of this nature, ultimately making the affair feel - loosely speaking - like what would really happen if the story conventions of a slasher were to play out in reality. This is one of the movie's major strengths, as it - along with his unparalleled capacity for absurd yet unsettling violence - makes the hulking madman at its core more frightening than his most direct inspiration (although it may just be that Jason's pop-culture status makes him feel like a morbid warm hug and grants him immunity from true fear on the part of an audience who's been counterintuitively rooting for him since the 1980s, whereas Johnny is just some guy who hasn't been osmosed into pop culture to the point that he's a star in his own right).
One of the best words to describe the feature is uncompromising, as it doesn't seem to truly care if its audience is on board with what it's doing. Its most obviously confronting aspect is its sometimes crushingly slow pace, which is used to build a feeling of dread by simply forcing you to inhabit the same space as the guy who's going to inflict great pain on the unsuspecting people he comes across. As an experience, it's almost uncomfortable by design, with its difficult-to-watch nature reflecting the idea that it isn't supposed to be nice. The shockingly brutal violence is often presented in protracted long takes that really highlight its barbarity. These scenes seamlessly blend practical effects with often widely shot footage, further making each and every kill feel as real as possible (the introduction of gore is rarely hidden by obvious cuts, for instance). This removes - or, at least, lessens - the usual genre trappings that allows audiences to form a healthy disconnect between real violence and movie violence, blurring the line to the point that it doesn't occupy the same oddly crowd-pleasing place as many of its most obvious inspirations. It isn't enjoyable in the same way, but it's still entertaining in its own, altogether more horrific fashion. A lot of the flick's conventional flaws are what make it distinct. Its commitment to its concept is generally really impressive, and it's hard to begrudge the movie for doing exactly what it wants to. Sure, it's slow and somewhat repetitive, often to the point where you feel your mind wandering in-between bouts of bloody bodily harm, but it's rarely anything less than interesting. Even if I don't find it particularly scary or even all that compelling, I admire its confidence and skill.
There is one consistent issue with the affair, though: it doesn't see things through. This is true in almost every area. It unflinchingly barrels towards its target, only to clumsily pull up at the last second and fly just far enough off course that you really notice its mishap. If you're going to do something, you should do it with conviction. To be fair, it's not conviction the film lacks; it just makes odd choices that lead to the same result. Some examples may help put things into perspective: the film has no non-diegetic music until it briefly does in a scene that trades consistency for a cheap scare; it hides the face of its killer until it doesn't in an unceremonious scene that puts it front and centre; and it follows its slasher as he slowly but surely stomps his way around the forest without cutting away until it jumps to another angle and makes you question why it held the previous shot for so damn long. In all these instances, the result of the last-minute change of heart simply makes you wonder why the pattern that's been broken was established in the first place, making you doubt every major decision and reevaluate in real time whether it was actually as brave and effective a choice as it initially seemed.
The main instance of this issue can be seen in the final movement, which - in a truly baffling move - shatters the core concept of the picture into a million pieces by shifting the film's perspective to follow the final girl. It then becomes more conventional while also refusing to take the expected route, instead opting to present an extended sequence with minimal suspense and an unsatisfying subversion at its climax (the kind of subversion that doesn't really work in a movie like this). It becomes way too talky and almost entirely inert, revolving around tangentially related dialogue that seems to think it's saying something profound about the slasher genre but is actually saying something so incredibly obvious that it usually just goes without saying (and has likely already occurred to every single fan of this type of film). This final movement really takes the wind out of the feature's sails and significantly dampens its overall impact. It's arguably one of the least effective endings I've ever seen, and it's honestly just as - if not more - boring than the bits in which the baddie does nothing other than wander through the forest for minutes at a time. With a stronger ending, the film would be far better than it ultimately is.
Other, smaller problems include some seriously silly decisions from some characters - including perhaps one of the most idiotic ideas ever to occur to a horror movie victim-to-be (and that's saying something) - and a tendency to frame its action in a repetitive way that's initially intriguing but eventually fairly dull (it mimics a third-person videogame, but never depicts anything more than waking while doing so and cuts to more interesting compositions for the more meaty action; why does it have to feel so restrictive for so long?). There's also the sense that the filmmakers think putting the audience "in the killer's perspective" means putting them "as close to the back of his head as possible", with the picture never really giving us an insight into what's going on in his brain. That's not inherently bad, as it doesn't seem like there's anything in particular rattling around in there (even the violence he inflicts is inconsistent, alternating between being shockingly sadistic and ruthlessly efficient), but the story isn't so much told from his perspective - as the marketing indicates - as it is told over his shoulder. There's still a notable distance from him, and it's not like slashers are shy about putting us in the point of view of their killers - sometimes literally - even if they don't do it as often or as consistently as this.
However, even though this is a very flawed effort, it's still an experience I'd recommend to fans of its genre. It tries to do something unique and it mostly succeeds on that front; its execution lacks refinement, but its concept is assured. There's some truly gnarly, seamlessly depicted violence that's sure to please gore hounds, and the more active segments are suitably compelling. When it boils down to it, it's better than quite a few of the 'Friday The 13th' movies, even if it does sort of feel like a big-budget fan film. It's sometimes boring, but so are most of those; this is just boring with the camera in a different location. It's a solid experimental horror feature which somehow manages to scratch the itch for the sort of straight-forward slasher that's been replaced by post-modern spins on the genre in recent years, even if this technically is the latter and it fumbles its finale quite significantly. It's not great, but it's good.
The Pale Blue Eye (2022)
E. A. Poe: it's in the poem.
'The Pale Blue Eye (2023)' is a fairly nuts-and-bolts mystery movie focused on a weary detective who's tasked with investigating the death and post-mortem mutilation of a solider at a nearby military camp. The unique selling point of the picture is that famous author Edgar Allan Poe joins the sleuth as a sort of 'inside man' within the camp. This is quite a weird choice, to be honest, as there's very little reason for that particular character to be a fictionalised version of a real-life figure (other than the fact that it's based on a book which presumably does the same thing). The story doesn't act as an adaptation of Poe's work, and the few references to his writing sprinkled throughout the affair feel entirely inessential; the flick would be no worse off for their absence, just as it would be no worse off for Poe's. Perhaps that's a cynical view on things, but it genuinely just feels like a fairly cheap attempt to make the movie more distinct and get more bums on seats. Despite that, though, this is a solid detective film that knows what it needs to do and do it well. It's just sturdy, not especially noteworthy but decent enough all the same. Its to-the-point story does include one or two twists, but this is par for the course with the genre and the narrative doesn't feel revelatory - or even especially inventive - overall. The piece is also really slow, arguably too slow for its own good. It does have a suitably gloomy, wintery atmosphere and a couple of strong central performances. It's not particularly enthralling, but it's relatively entertaining even during its least compelling segments. It's a commendable effort that may fall somewhat short of its potential, but is good certainly enough to be worth watching.
Ouija (2014)
It's not good, but least you won't be too board...
'Ouija (2014)' is one of those movies that can trick you into thinking it's fine simply because it doesn't provoke a visceral negative reaction. It's technically competent, mostly quite zippy and - last but not least - not boring. It's never good, but it's never especially bad... or so you might think. The truth is that the only reason you don't feel negatively about it is because you don't feel anything about it at all; it doesn't provoke a reaction of any sort. It's a totally apathetic viewing experience, a nuts-and-bolts horror picture that follows its formula to a tee and tells its tale without any real passion. If Olivia Cooke wasn't in the lead role, there'd be nothing to hold on to. It's all just so underwhelming and, frankly, artless. There's no energy, no vitality, no atmosphere of any kind. At one point, the piece made me audibly say "is that it?". It wasn't (and I suspected as such), but all that meant is that I had the opportunity to say the exact same thing ten minutes later. It's all too tempting to say that movies like this are alright, that they're not that bad. In some ways, they're not. They're not offensive or mind-numbingly dull, for instance. That's a very, very low bar to clear, though. If something makes you feel absolutely nothing, if you're no different for having seen it, if you barely remember it the moment it's over, then surely it can be considered a waste of time. Of course, you have to spend time to know if you've wasted it, and if you're a cinephile like me (and you probably are) then it's difficult to claim that time spent watching any picture is a total write off, but you get my point. There comes a time when you have to acknowledge that simply not being awful isn't enough to be considered good - or even average - by default. While I can't quite condemn this feature as harshly as many others have (it isn't quite as bad as its reputation led me to believe), I also can't claim that it's anything other than below-average corporate laziness. It doesn't even do us the favour of being a total train wreck, something terrible but interesting. It's just bland, forgettable, and entirely uninspiring. It fades from your mind as soon as it's over. I don't hate it, but it's definitely not good.
Zhang bei (1981)
Removing her from the final fight is a bit a(u)nti(e) climactic...
'My Young Auntie (1981)' tells the tale of a young woman who marries her much older master - as an act of respect to repay his kindness, rather than romance - and goes to stay with his oldest brother's son after he passes away in order to make sure his inheritance doesn't fall into the hands of his no-good youngest brother, as per his controversial final wishes. Naturally, her nephew-by-marriage is much older than she is, hence the title. In fact, she's about the same age as her nephew's son, even though she's technically his grand-auntie and therefore significantly more senior than him in terms of the family dynamic. Beyond a few expected age-related gags, most of the conflict - and comedy - comes from traditionalism vs modernism. The eponymous auntie represents somewhat of an oxymoron: she's young, but she's old-school. Her college-age grandnephew, who studies English in Hong Kong and is an advocate for being trendy (as well as calling his father "daddy"), clashes with her old-fashioned sensibilities (which much more closely align with those of his dad) and struggles to accept her as his senior. It helps, of course, that she can kick ass like the best of them, capable of putting anyone who calls her a "bumpkin" in their place and holding her own against hoards of horny young men or malicious money-grubbing relatives.
As to be expected from something directed by - and starring - Lau Kar-leung, the fight choreography is absolutely spectacular. It is, of course, the highlight of the entire affair, and it comes to a crescendo in an extended final battle that's totally jaw-dropping in its fast-paced fervour. The athleticism of the performers is nothing short of miraculous, and the direction perfectly frames each and every moment of scrumptious action impeccably. It strikes the perfect balance between one-on-one and one-on-many, hand-to-hand and weapon-to-weapon. It's the kind of stuff that's more ballet than brutal, a precise dance that uses the context of battle to showcase the beauty of its martial arts. There are fun set-pieces elsewhere in the film that make good use of comedic timing within their frenetic action, but it's the propulsive and eye-widening display of Kung fu prowess that is the third act where things really pop off.
Sadly, it also contains the biggest disappointment of the entire affair. The brilliant Kara Wai's Cheng Tai-Nan, the feature's strong-willed and strong-fisted protagonist, spends the second half of the last movement tied up. This is especially frustrating considering how front and centre she is for the rest of the picture, a force to be reckoned with who constantly has the upper hand on the men around her. Having her in the lead role is great not only for female representation (even though there are a couple of moments of objectification), but also for the film as a whole: she's easily the most interesting and commanding character, and - at least prior to the final stretch - she kicks the most butt in the entire movie. To make things worse, the movie takes her out of the equation by having her fall into the role of 'damsel in distress' (albeit stoic 'damsel in distress'), which is really unsatisfying and runs counter to almost everything we've seen before. The last segment of action instead mostly focuses on four old men, three of whom only come into the narrative as it heads into its last segment, and it's just a really odd decision. The director himself takes centre stage during this part of the picture, and it almost feels a little vain for him to do so. However, the fact that he's an established expert martial artist who can impress just as much as - if not more than - the rest of his cast certainly helps alleviate this vibe. After all, if you're going to show off, you better have the skills to do so; Lau Kar-leung certainly does. Still, having the actual hero be out of action for the final bout leaves a notably sour taste in the mouth, no matter how stunning the climactic set-piece is.
However, the film is really enjoyable despite this major flaw. It's light-hearted fun with a nice blend of comedy and action. It's essentially a family drama for its majority, with the unconventional dynamics between its eponymous Auntie and her new relatives providing plenty of opportunity for misadventure before the stakes get more conventional in the siege-based final third. It's a little bit too long for what it is (it's nearly two hours), and its pacing is a somewhat strained. It's very backloaded in terms of its best action, even if there are plenty of entertaining fights sprinkled throughout its first half, and there's a sense that it's spinning its wheels somewhat during its midsection. Some of its humour works well, but quite a lot of it falls fairly flat. A few of its characters, particularly the grandnephew, are rather annoying for a lot of its runtime, too. Plus, the subtitles on the version I watched included an unpleasant surprise in the form of a homophobic slur. I'm not sure if that's present in all versions or if that's even what's actually said, but I'm not a fan regardless. The nicer surprise is a cameo from Gordon Liu, who not only wears a regular wig but also wears a big fluffy wig when his character dresses up for a masquerade party. Ultimately, this is an entertaining and engaging martial arts movie that has some issues but mostly overcomes them. It isn't as emotionally engaging or as pacy as the best in its genre, but it's fun enough for what it is and includes some stunning fight sequences.
Donnie Darko (2001)
And I find it kind of funny; I find it kind of sad...
'Donnie Darko (2001)' is one of those movies that seems smarter than it is because it's purposefully oblique, vaguely hinting towards the mechanics of its pseudo sci-fi plot and loosely philosophic purpose. Its admirable ambiguity generates an enigmatic allure that allows you to come up with your own interpretation of its events and their meaning, and whatever you come up with is likely going to be more satisfying than what was initially intended. The internet's countless 'Donnie Darko Explained' articles and videos have naturally removed some of the movie's mystique in the years since its release, as has its own director's cut - which conveys writer-director Richard Kelly's original ambitions more explicitly and, by most accounts, clumsily. When you actually break down what happens in the film and why, it all gets a bit too silly for its own good. There's an intangible, metaphysical charm to a lot of the picture that's reduced drastically once you get into the minutia of its events, and very few of the actual nuts-and-bolts explanations measure up to those you concoct for yourself upon viewing the affair. Having said that, the ideas at play here are still fairly potent and they're well-executed across the board. Although (and I'm aware this point goes against what I said about the piece being at its most powerful when it isn't answering the questions it poses) the ending is a tad too ambiguous and is essentially so bizarre that it catches you off guard no matter how closely you've been paying attention, the rest of the picture has a palpably puzzling and peculiar vibe that's quite intoxicating in its own way. It conveys a genuine sense of loneliness, and is often quite sinister in its own subdued way. It's also rather funny on occasion, with a dryly dark sense of humour often based around suburban satire. There's quite a bit going on here, but for me the most successful stuff is the unconventional teen coming-of-age story at its centre. Amidst the ominous imaginary friends, portentous omens and strange science-fiction, there's a boy coming to terms with his place in the world and a community coming to terms with their place in his. Jake Gyllenhaal is notably good even this early in his career, and the supporting performances are equally as compelling. Mary McDonnell, in particular, puts in an understated yet fantastic effort; her brief scene in the psychologist's office stands out to me as one of the movie's most memorable moments thanks to her effortlessly emotive acting. Generally speaking, this is a confident and compelling effort that doesn't quite feel like anything else out there. It isn't great and some of the, I suppose, canonical explanations of its events are somewhat tiresome, but it's a strange and suitably obscure experience that's engaging and enjoyable throughout.
Kill (2023)
He's been TRAINing for this his entire life.
'Kill (2023)' is already violent before a certain something happens and its lead character totally snaps. After that happens, it becomes a veritable bloodbath as the protagonist abandons the notion of taking prisoners (and being a hero) and becomes preoccupied with only a single, instructive thought (look no further than the title if you need a clue as to what that is). From the 45-minute mark, this is a bone-crunching, blood-spilling, neck-snapping, face-smashing, fire-setting, head-crushing experience in sheer, unadulterated savagery. What stands out the most about all the well-choreographed, pulse-pounding brutality is the fact that it has tangible consequences. It's not just exciting, throwaway movie violence meant to provide slick entertainment as a kind of barbaric ballet, it's visceral, gut-wrenching, squirm-in-your-seat sort of stuff that constantly makes you question what kind of man (or monster) the protagonist is now that all pretences of being an honorable hero have gone out the window. His unrelenting, indiscriminate, vengeance-fuelled viciousness causes just as much grief as the ruthless actions of his enemies, and the only thing that keeps him in the position of 'good guy' (even if his actions make him definitely not a good guy) is the fact that his foes started this whole bloody affair. You almost feel sorry for the baddies, who are caught totally unaware by the murderous rage they unwittingly unleash and mostly don't seem as though they signed up to experience the consequences of their leader's rash actions. They're not an elite team of criminals capable of facing whatever threat is thrown at them. They also aren't just a bunch of faceless goons who don't care about each other and are totally expendable to their employer; they're an extended family with names, implied personalities and defined relationships to one another. They get angry, they get scared and, most potently, they grieve their loved ones. That's perhaps the most potent aspect - and prevailing emotion - of the entire affair: grief. It's a really tragic picture that makes sure to show not only the innocent victims mourning the loss of their family members, but also the bandits themselves. Everyone who dies here is grieved by someone else, and it really makes you stop and think about the reality of all the carnage you witness. For most passengers on the train, it would have been less traumatic simply to get robbed by these thieves than it is to see them almost literally get torn to pieces right before their eyes. It's a really distinct experience in that regard, balancing the fun of its frenetic, often jaw-dropping action with the horror of its life-ending devastation. This means that although a lot of the kills are downright sadistic, the flick never feels as though it's outright endorsing the violence at its core, making it as off-putting as possible both in terms of pain and morality. Very few people make it out of this thing alive and that's exactly its point: violence begets violence. It truly is unique when it comes to how deeply it indulges in fast-paced ferocity (death is at its very core, after all) while simultaneously implicitly decrying it. It's one of the most violent action movies, and it strikes a balance between being entertaining and horrifying. It's hard to get fully wrapped up in the glee of its confident genre goodness (of which there's plenty) when you're constantly reminded how gruesome it all is/ would be in reality. That's not to imply it's anything less than a pulse-pounding, propulsive action extravaganza with a tight pace and an expert control over its on-screen chaos. As my brother put it, it istantly feels like a stone-cold action classic. 'John Wick (2015)', 'The Raid (2011)', 'Kill (2024)'. It isn't out of place among those movies, which just so happen to be some of the best actioners of all time. While I can't confidently put it in that 'best of the best' category just yet (I've only seen it once, after all), I can say that it's a balls-to-the-wall, blisteringly feral experience that wears its genre like a badge of honor but also isn't quite like anything else within it. It's well-made in every area and is thunderously entertaining. Its interesting implicit exploration of the morality of its violence is something you have to see to fully appreciate, and its portrayal of grief on both sides of the good guy/ bad guy spectrum is genuinely quite potent. It made me somewhat emotional in unexpected ways. It's a really vital and bracing effort that's easily a highlight of the entire year. It's great.
MaXXXine (2024)
X marks the spot.
'MaXXXine (2024)' is the third and seemingly final film in Ti West's unlikely trilogy, picking up six years after 'X (2022)' and following its eponymous character as she lands her breakout mainstream role in Hollywood. Within the trilogy, 'Pearl (2022)' is the outlier in that it isn't as narratively connected to the other films as they are to each other. This latest entry would be pretty confusing to those who haven't seen the first, but the middle chapter (which is a prequel) is essentially inessential to the overarching story - beyond its purpose in fleshing-out the origins of a certain villainous character, of course. That's not to suggest skipping over any of the features in this unconventional franchise, just to say that this newest effort is far more of a traditional follow-up than the flick it follows.
Pushing the setting and aesthetic straight into the home-video boom of the mid-80s, the movie absolutely nails its throwback atmosphere. The way the film looks, the way the camera moves, the way the violence plays out, the way the actors act, and the way the sax-and-synth-heavy score sounds all expertly evoke the intended era. It's really enjoyable to see, and the zippy first act is made all the more successful because of it. Ti West has a tendency to take real-life contexts and subtexts and render them literal, so it's perhaps no surprise that the satanic panic that marked much of his target time-period is portrayed on screen and integral to the narrative. As unsubtle as it may be, it's an interesting addition that goes hand in hand with the picture's ambitions to play out as a sleazy, city-set slasher with Giallo homages (including a leather-gloved killer whose face is kept off screen until the third act), the kind of neon-soaked video nasty that came as a result of American filmmakers looking to European cinema for inspiration. It's visually and aurally compelling right from the very first frame, and it's a loving recreation that's sure to please fans of the genuine article (just like the previous entries in this trilogy).
It's worth mentioning that Mia Goth arguably delivers her best work in the series, seeming far more natural and grounded within the established world. It's less showy but more believable. Of course, this type of performance only works in this kind of movie; it wouldn't have worked in the others, which required something different yet equally impressive. The supporting actors are also really good, most notably Giancarlo Esposito and Kevin Bacon. The writing, while sometimes a little on-the-nose and unfocused (primarily in terms of plotting and such), is typically compelling and just the right amount of pulpy. It, combined with the performances, makes most of the characters feel fully formed. The story itself can be a bit less impressive than the techniques - both in front of and behind the camera - used to tell it. For example, despite following the tropes of a slasher - a whodunnit slasher, in particular - it doesn't really function all that well as a mystery and also doesn't actually include all that many slashings (at least not on screen). I guessed who the killer is relatively early on, not because the piece is particularly deft at sprinkling hints into the fray that attentive viewers can pick up on and a feel catharsis about when the reveal finally comes, but because there's only really one viable option as to who it could be (although it's not like they're the instantly obvious choice) and the affair never really makes the effort to provide either legitimate clues or red herrings as to their identity.
Further narrative issues start to arrive as the picture moves deeper into its second act. The pacing starts to stagnate somewhere around the movie's midway point, and the film feels like it's spinning its wheels somewhat during this time. Its main plot doesn't really have all that much drive during this segment, mainly because it's intersecting with the more character-driven stuff that provides background texture. Having said that, there's only really one proper storyline and everything else acts as a supplement to that, so perhaps the better way to put it is that the wider world-and-character-building elements begin to overshadow the main narrative they're meant to bolster. It's not like the floor totally drops out from underneath the feature, but it notably lacks thrust even as it continues to entertain on a scene-by-scene basis. Furthermore, the third act drops the ball quite significantly. It almost changes genres, morphing to become something that still evokes the 80s but abandons the horror framework that's so core the the affair's identity. Perhaps it does this to subvert expectation, but it's really unsatisfying (despite being as well-made as anything else in the movie). It also removes the protagonist's agency in a way that doesn't work considering how strong a presence she is in the rest of the picture. This could have been used as a way to generate fear, to have our typically in-control and tough hero be put in a situation that removes her of the ruthless capability and readiness which usually makes her potentially more dangerous than her enemies. However, it instead causes mild frustration because it feels like the focus of the film has been wrenched away, if only briefly, from its star. The actual denouement is also less than satiating, a muddled and prolonged epilogue that doesn't feel like an appropriately punchy end to this movie, let alone the overall trilogy.
At the same time, though, it's not like the feature is anything less than entertaining even at its weakest. It's really fun for the most of its runtime, and its aesthetic is consistently excellent. It really feels like the kind of film it's trying to replicate, striking a balance between commenting on its genre and whole-heartedly embracing it. There's more value to it than just its status as an immersive, genre-literate throwback, which is why it's able to mostly overcome its few issues. It's a really well-made and enjoyable experience with strong performances, a striking atmosphere and plenty of blood-soaked violence. It's perhaps not the best movie in its franchise, but it's of a similar quality to its predecessors and rounds its trilogy with aplomb. It's really good.
The Equalizer 3 (2023)
The Italian job.
This isn't really a comment on the film itself, but I'd be remiss if I didn't mention that this is the only 'Equalizer' movie not to be cut for a 15 certificate and it's arguably the most violent of the three. It really makes you wonder what the BBFC were thinking with the other two, although it may be that their guidelines have shifted over the years, and highlights the relative arbitrariness of their trims to the previous pictures.
After a compellingly blood-soaked opening movement, 'The Equalizer 3 (2023)' takes a page out of its predecessors' books and slows down to an absolute crawl. Sticking Robert McCall in a sleepy Italian town that he soon starts to see as home, a lot of the movie is dedicated to the day-to-day life of its protagonist as he meets new people and takes a breather from his vigilantism. Of course, it isn't all that long before that vigilantism rears its head once again, but it's arguably too long for the feature's own good. The pacing is pretty shot, to be honest. It doesn't help that there's an entire storyline that's only tangentially related to the meat-and-potatoes plot which doesn't really do anything other than further slow down the already slow affair.
Surprisingly, the story actually sees McCall reckon with the ethics and consequences of his tendency to dole out death in the name of his version of justice. Unsurprisingly, it doesn't do it very well. While it initially threatens to take a step back and actually make a comment on the violent methods of its hero, the feature eventually slips back into the borderline endorsement of - or, at the very least, total nonchalance towards - brutality that's practically a staple of the series at this point, as vital to its DNA as Denzel Washington's steely gaze. This is arguably worse than totally ignoring the moral ramifications of murder, as the movie ends up toying with the idea that its kill-happy hero may not be a good man before eventually settling on the theory that he is precisely 'because' he's so kill-happy - or, to be more accurate, because he's willing to kill to protect those he cares about. It essentially says that violence is necessary, a means to an end that can't be avoided and can often be heroic. Whereas it could be argued that this message is implicitly conveyed in the previous pictures because they aren't interested in engaging with the question in the first place (and is therefore accidental), the fact that this third outing makes a point of pondering the ethics of violence means that the filmmakers thought about it and decided that portraying it as fine in certain circumstances was the right move. It isn't presented as a necessary evil, either, because the heroic characters are usually given a clean break in its aftermath.
None of this would be a major problem if the violence on display wasn't as outwardly sadistic as it is. While most of it is perpetrated as a broad form of defence, the individual acts are more often than not straight-up murders. Robert McCall is still a total psychopath, and he honestly seems like Jigsaw at times. I don't mean he has a penchant for gruesome traps (although he definitely does), but rather that he uses a loose moralisation system of his own design to dictate who he deems worthy of suffering. He also has a tendency to claim that he gives all his victims a chance. He seems like a guy looking for an excuse to kill, rather than someone reluctantly killing because he sees no other alternative. He actually seems to take some sort of pleasure in his barbarity, taking an extra moment to savour the life draining from his enemy's eyes or cruelly watch them scramble to escape a fate he knows they can't outrun.
Of course, I'm not particularly bothered by violence. In the right context, it can be exciting and fun. The set-pieces in this are a bit odd because they aren't exactly pulse-pounding exercises in entertainment, more like short, sharp bursts of slasher-esque cruelty that often frame the protagonist as a horror movie villain while simultaneously championing his cause as the righteous one. The score highlights this effect, as the music is often weirdly creepy and seems to hint towards a moral ambiguity that the narrative ultimately lacks. Even though they aren't conventional, the action scenes are enjoyable in their own way. While they're far too infrequent for the film's good, they're probably the best parts of the affair and they often include creative kills that catch you somewhat off guard. The direction strikes a balance between clean framing and quick cutting to convey a sense of controlled chaos without disorienting the viewer, and it typically works really well. The cinematography is used to good effect, both in and out of the action, and is particularly nice during the nighttime sequences. The competence of the action is emblematic of the movie's general technical competence, something which outperforms its narrative capability fairly considerably.
Although the undercurrent of sadism in the three 'Equalizer' pictures leaves a sour taste in the mouth, it wouldn't be a massive issue if the films were better overall. This latest entry in the series is better than the second but not as good as the first. Its set-pieces are cruel but effective, its central performance is fairly compelling, and its score is unexpectedly striking. The narrative is way too slow for its own good, though, and a lot of it just feels slightly silly. There are large stretches of the piece that are far less interesting than they ought to be. Its highlights are just about strong enough to tip the overall effort into the 'good' category, but it's not something I'd recommend rushing to see unless you're a massive fan of these films.
A Quiet Place: Day One (2024)
Don't speak; I know what you're saying...
'A Quiet Place: Day One (2024)' is a prequel to 'A Quiet Place (2018)' and 'A Quiet Place Part II (2020)' that depicts what happens when the series' iconic aliens and their super sensitive ears first land on Earth and ruin everyone's day. Focusing primarily on a new character played by Lupita Nyong'o, the flick has a pretty loose plot that primarily sees its characters trying to survive their unprecedented situation. After the initial attack, it becomes somewhat of a two-hander when it introduces a nervous Brit played by Joseph Quinn. The narrative essentially sees the pair embark on a mission together, the nature of which I won't spoil, and I appreciate the fact that it doesn't just go in the direction you may expect. It has a fairly strong focus on character and relationship development, which allows it to generate some emotional resonance and catharsis as it heads into its final third. Even so, it's fairly light when it comes to story and - even at a rather breezy 99 minutes - it can sometimes feel like it's treading water. It's not like it ever comes to a standstill, but the level of engagement it generates sometimes slips below the ideal level. The fact that most of the picture plays out as one, long suspense sequence does have the unfortunate side effect of infrequently diluting its potency. Because so much of it unfolds in a single register, it can feel slightly flat on occasion. What's more, its tension simply can't persist across the wider arc of its narrative. Having said that, though, the piece does do a mostly good job of balancing slow, creeping moments in which people have to keep as quiet as possible with fast, explosive segments in which all hell breaks loose and its characters have to figure out some way of re-establishing the silence that keeps them safe. Its individual scenes, both those focused on action and on stealth, are often really compelling. The special effects are tangible (it's sometimes seamless where a practical set ends and a CGI background begins), the acting is convincing (Nyong'o is notably good) and the direction is confident. It's an entertaining experience, even during its slower and less gripping moments. Despite its occasionally somewhat lax pacing, pretty sparse plot and some narrative shortcuts (the world figures out they've got to keep very quiet very quickly), the feature is an enjoyable and sometimes edge-of-your seat experience. It's big-budget popcorn horror, which in itself is quite unusual, and it's as fun as it should be. It's probably about as good as its predecessors, even if its characters and story aren't quite as compelling. It's a really solid effort.
Dracula (1958)
You can count on Dracula to ruin your day.
Taking quite a few liberties when it comes to adapting its source material, Hammer's 'Dracula (1958)' retools its iconic story to focus primarily on the conflict between its eponymous bloodsucker and Van Helsing, the Vampire Hunter. Reimagining the latter as younger and (loosely speaking) more action-oriented, the piece pushes him into the role of protagonist at the cost of severely reducing the importance of several of its other players. That's not necessarily a bad thing, though, as accuracy doesn't make for a good film in and of itself. Besides, the more this can do to distance itself from the already ubiquitous Universal version, the better. While this isn't the first film to feature extended canine teeth on its creatures of the night, it's the one that popularised them and several other images you readily associate with the vampire genre. Christopher Lee makes for a more subdued Count Dracula than Bela Lugosi, with no thousand-yard hypnotic stares or instantly recognisable accent, but he imbues the character with an animalistic quality that explodes onto the screen whenever the pretence of being human no longer serves its purpose. There's also a somewhat calmly erotic element he brings to the character, with his various female victims seeming to want his fangs deep inside them (this was apparently more clear in the original cut, but - along with some additional gore - the scenes that highlighted it were removed for the wide release). Lee only appears on screen for seven minutes, speaking a mere sixteen lines of dialogue and only doing so within the first act. That's definitely not as much Dracula as I'd like, but the feature's sparing use of him is effective enough. Because the whole affair is about eliminating his evil, he has an oddly ever-present feeling and his appearances are always compelling (if not especially scary). Playing opposite him is Peter Cushing, whose version of Van Helsing is essentially the first step in getting the character from the old professor-type person he is in the novel and its initial adaptation(s) to the ass-kicking Vampire slayer we see in more modern media such as Van Helsing (2004). He's really good in the role, combining his British stiff upper lip with an energetic physical capability that allows him to burst into action mere moments after delivering an extended speech in his classic cadence. The picture isn't filled with set-pieces, by any means, but it has a bit more zip to it than you might expect. Although it's definitely a talky affair (perhaps too talky on occasion), there are a couple of exciting sequences that are actually rather thrilling in their own way and often make use of special effects that must have been fairly shocking for the time (although certainly tame by today's standards). The movie generally lacks a strong sense of atmosphere. The moody, gothic impressionism and inky black-and-white cinematography of certain previous adaptations has been replaced with a more conventional approach that makes use of a generic technicolor palette. It's autumnal in its own weirdly cosy way, but its muted colours feel as though they blend into each other and there's a lack of contrast (although the bright-red blood is nice and painterly). Even though it isn't exactly filled with stark images that remain in your imagination long after they've appeared, it doesn't look especially bad. In fact, it certainly has its own aesthetic charm. That charm reverberates across the entire experience. It's not great, but it's hard not to like. It's a quaint affair that's mostly enjoyable, a sturdy and well-paced adaptation that may be a bit too talky at times but makes some bold choices and includes moments of fairly gripping action. It's a dependable effort.
Yi dai zong shi (2013)
That feeling when you find out you've watched an inferior 'international cut' that's notably different from the original version...
We all know that Harvey Weinstein can't keep his grubby hands to himself, so it's perhaps natural to lay the blame for this 'international cut' solely at his feet. After all, his production company picked up the global rights to the film with the prerequisite that it would be trimmed to under two hours. Considering the original version had already been sliced from a reported four hours down to a fairly reasonable 130 minutes, this is a bit of a strange request. Imagine my surprise, though, when director Wong Kar-Wai stated that this new version isn't "watered down" and actually contains some material not present in the original. The fact that the filmmaker actually supervised this cut is almost unbelievable, because it's by far the worst thing he's produced to date (that I've seen, at least).
That's not to imply that what made it to international screens isn't unmistakably the work of Wong Kar-Wai; you only have to wait mere moments before the director's iconic stuttering slow-motion comes into play, for instance. However, there's a palpable sense that his initial intention has been lost amidst his efforts to make the history surrounding 'The Grandmaster (2013)' more palatable to Western audiences. While trying to present something that people unfamiliar with Chinese history will instantly understand, he's lost almost all sense of heart and - to a lesser but still notable degree - purpose. My mum described the movie as monotone, and that's perhaps the best word for it. It plods forwards in a single register, occasionally stopping to display intertitles that explain elements of the plot instead of organically allowing them to be shown and - more importantly - felt. We don't really see how these events affect the characters, which makes them feel almost entirely irrelevant even though they're the main thing that the 'international cut' wants to convey to its audience. It's hard to get invested in anything because the important things - like character and theme - are conveyed too obliquely and the unimportant things - like historical events and people's names - are conveyed too explicitly.
Furthermore, the whole film has the aesthetic, pacing and structure of an extended dream sequence. It all plays out in a slightly surreal, stream-of-consciousness style that might replicate the cadence of its lead characters' signature martial art style but also beats you over the head due to its repetitive and unrelenting nature. Things start out quite promisingly, and the overt stylisation is striking in each and every scene, but eventually it becomes hard to stay focused because everything just feels the same. There's no real ebb and flow, no build up to the fights, no calm before the storm. By the time the flick's most interesting elements - including its best fight scene - rolls around, you just don't care anymore. The action doesn't feel like action because it rarely has any real consequences, coming and going just as easily as the elliptical drama. The same sense of inertia applies to the narrative, too. Although it isn't exactly stagnant in terms of what occurs, it plows through its events with an "and then this happened" attitude that makes a lot of it feel fairly perfunctory. It isn't clear why we're being told this story, and that's even worse when the 'international cut' eventually makes a big stink out of hammering this into a more traditional biopic box with an ending that comes out of nowhere and almost feels like something out of an entirely different affair. What I mean is that you can kind of tell the initial ambition doesn't line up with the final (international) execution, in that what seems to have been a story centred around the kind of elusive connections this director always returns to has instead been retooled as a more conventional 'true story' picture meant to showcase the nuts-and-bolts life story of Bruce Lee's mentor (and it's still too obscure to really do that, no matter how many intertitles it throws at you, because it was never meant to be something that could do that even if it wanted to).
The end result is definitely disappointing, despite being as lavish and visually stunning and narratively slippery as you'd expect from something directed by Wong Kar-Wai. Perhaps the original cut is a major improvement over the one I inadvertently watched, but I can only comment on what I've seen and what I've seen doesn't really impress me. It's just really hard to care about anything that happens in the feature, and a lot of it is as confusing as it is boring. As my mum said, it's monotone. Its aesthetic is accomplished and often quite breathtaking, but it's pretty much the only thing to hold on to. I'd be lying if I said I liked it, no matter how much I wanted to. It's not very good, to be honest.
The Bikeriders (2023)
If my grandmother had wheels...
'The Bikeriders (2023)' is based on the book of the same name and follows the lives of members of a motorcycle gang founded in the late 1960s. At the heart of the film is Jodie Comer's Kathy, a straight-laced lady who becomes enamored by the mysterious Benny (Austin Butler) and finds herself in a sort of love triangle between her new husband and the founder of the gang he holds so dear (Tom Hardy). Kathy is, essentially, the film's protagonist, as it's told primarily from her perspective and the interview-based framing device ensures that even the scenes she isn't in are tinged with her point of view. Essentially an examination of a specific kind of masculinity, the movie doesn't focus as much on motorcycles as you may expect - even though bikes are certainly integral to, and inseparable from, its core concept. Taking place over a number of years, the narrative essentially depicts the downfall of the club, which initially starts out as a way for lonely men to connect and not feel like outsiders anymore but eventually devolves into a sprawling, out-of-control gang that dabbles in real crime. One of the main problems with the piece is that it's arguable Benny isn't really a character so much as a prop or, perhaps, idea; he never changes and his relationship with Kathy is so poorly defined that it's difficult to know if either of them actually care about each other for large portions of the piece (perhaps this is intentional, but it still feels weird and makes it hard to invest in one of the central plot lines). Johnny, the club's founder, is more of a conventional character in the sense that he changes over the course of the story, becoming noticeably more weary as time goes on. Kathy, too, evolves in her own way. Everyone else is fairly one-note (although a couple of notable side players are treated with more nuance), but that's almost unavoidable when there are so many characters and there's so much history that needs to be covered. The film feels somewhat observational and cold, although it also has a handful of more intimate scenes that are far more affecting than its more clinical segments. However, it manages to capture the sort of fly-on-the-wall feel that its source material (which I haven't read) must also have considering it was written by someone who directly witnessed a lot of the events it depicts. In some ways, it feels like a sprawling epic; in others, a tragic romance (between husband and wife, friend and mentor, leader and follower, man and bike). It sometimes struggles to find its sense of purpose, but also features a handful of scenes that seem to pinpoint it with laser precision. There's also a palpable homoeroticism underpinning some of the affair (one scene in particular) and it tinges everything with an all-encompassing subtext that you can't help but think about once you've noticed. It's a little slow on occasion and it can sometimes leave you a little underwhelmed, but it's typically an entertaining and really well-crafted experience. The filmmaking isn't particularly fancy, but don't let that fool you into thinking it isn't top tier. The sets, costumes and vehicles plant the picture firmly in its intended time period and the performances are really grounded in a way that brings out the subtleties of scenes that wouldn't work anywhere near as well as they do if they weren't acted with such grace. It's a solid pseudo-biopic with an interesting subject and a confident execution.
Deliria (1987)
The play's the thing.
Starting off with a bang, 'Stage Fright (1987)' makes it clear early on that it's going to be pretty much everything you could hope for in a pseudo-Giallo slasher. The only reason I say "pseudo" is that the picture doesn't make use of a whodunnit narrative, instead having its killer be more similar to someone like Michael Myers from 'Halloween (1978)', but still has all the aesthetics of something distinctly Italian (a lesser Dario Argento springs to mind). Taking place during the rehearsals for an upcoming stage play about a masked murderer, the film depicts a skeleton crew of performers continuing to work even after discovering the corpse of a makeup artist outside. Because the director wants to capitalise on the infamy that's sure to come from such an event, he locks his players inside (and hides the key so well he doesn't even know where it is) and demands they get ready for the opening night he's sure will be a thundering success. Unfortunately for him and everyone else (except us, of course), he's also locked the killer in with them. The movie makes good use of its distinct setting to both justify and invigorate its familiar set-up. Featuring just the right amount of creatively spilled gore, the flick bathes its players in near-neon light as they're stalked by an owl-masked murderer whose first kill is nonchalantly watched by everyone else because they believe he's simply rehearsing alongside his target. It's a really fun time filled with suspense, splatter and screams. I wish that it maintained its intensity all throughout its third act, as it settles back into its previously suitable ebb-and-flow rhythm even after everything goes to hell and the final girl has to face off against the killer alone, but this is a fairly minor problem. Really, despite its flaws, this is supreme slasher entertainment and it delivers exactly what you want from something like this. It's entertaining from beginning to end, delivering its scares with a hint of a wink that signals it's in on the joke (or, perhaps, genre), and is well-crafted in all the areas that count. It's a really fun, aesthetically pleasing effort.
Lik wong (1991)
It's got a lot of guts.
'Riki-Oh: The Story Of Ricky (1991)' is somewhat odd because it's both good and bad. Not good because it's bad, just good and bad. As Edgar Wright himself once wrote, it's a film that's sort of "above ranking". This uber-violent martial arts movie sort of plays out like a comedy except instead of jokes there are explosions of extreme gore that would make even the most seasoned Mortal Kombat player blush. Although the violence is intense (there's a strong argument to be made that this is one of the most violent movies), it's so silly and over-the-top and often not exactly convincing (even though most of it's pretty effective if you can suspend your disbelief) that it's never upsetting in the slightest. The only truly valid reaction to the bloodshed is one of shock followed swiftly by laughter; each and every gag is as jaw-dropping as it is side-splitting (both puns intended). The film makes no effort to hide the fact that it's essentially all about the creative ways in which it eviscerates its characters, and there's a sense that it's constantly winking at you even while playing things relatively straight. The choreography comes entirely secondary to the butchery that acts as blunt punctuation in the fight scenes, so the action isn't so much exciting as it is startling (somehow, the piece is able to surprise with each increasingly creative way it dispatches its characters). There's a sense that both you and the film itself are waiting for the blood to start flowing and the guts to start spilling, with each set-piece sort of acting like a macabre jack-in-the-box that's slowly having its handle cranked until someone's head comes off or their eyes pop out or they slice themselves open and use their own intestines as a strangling weapon. This cycle applies both to individual scenes and to the affair as a whole, leading to an experience that essentially amounts to a series of grisly death blows held together by the loosest semblance of plot and character. Apparently, a lot of the narrative from the source manga was purposefully lost in adaptation because the filmmakers weren't confident their work would be popular enough to produce a sequel and didn't want to disappoint audiences with hints towards things that wouldn't be explored in further features. Because of this, many reveals that seem to be fairly heavily telegraphed simply don't happen, and the story suffers because of it. There are a lot of unanswered questions, with the biggest one being "why?". The central character is robbed of almost all reason for his actions, instead given only the vaguest of backstories explored via flashbacks, and this makes a lot of what he does feel reactionary at best and arbitrary at worst. It's not a huge issue because the material isn't exactly begging for in-depth character development and a more straightforward plot suits its ambitions of being primarily about bone-crunching violence, but it is noticeable and contributes to the intangible yet inescapable feeling that a lot of the picture is just a little dull. Perhaps that's not the right word, but there's definitely a sense that everything is ever-so-slightly less engaging than it ought to be. That's even reflected in the action itself, which isn't particularly compelling simply because of the way it's set up to revolve entirely around momentary outbursts of bodily destruction. If said destruction weren't some of the most inventive and intense ever put to film, it wouldn't be enough to truly hold your attention. Thankfully, it is. Despite being theoretically repetitive, this savagery never fails to make your eyes widen and your smile widen. Because the movie gets its tone so right, it never feels as though it's beating you over the head with its brutality and it never registers as being in poor taste. It doesn't treat death with the reverence it perhaps deserves, but very few action movies do; this just happens to be a lot more explicit in its depictions of murder. Ultimately, this is a film that gives you a very specific kind of pleasure. That's essentially what I mean when I say it's both good and bad. It isn't a so much a combination of good and bad elements as entirely good and entirely bad all at once, exactly what it needs to be and only as enjoyable as it is precisely because of this oxymoron. Perhaps that doesn't make sense; it's hard to articulate, to be honest. The bottom line, though, is that the film is entertaining and kind of essential for a specific subset of moviegoers. Even though I don't love it, I'm certainly in that subset and am probably better off for having seen it. It's truly difficult to rate because it doesn't quite feel like anything else. It's both awesome and lacklustre all at once. It has to be seen to be believed, though. I like it quite a bit. I'm not sure what else to say, so I'll just punch a hole in this wall and walk through it dramatically.
The New Mutants (2020)
Out with the new and in with the old, I say.
'The New Mutants (2020)' is the only 'X-Men' movie I haven't seen before, and its reputation certainly precedes it. After being delayed three times before Covid came along and ruined everyone's year (and being delayed once more because of it), the film ended up premiering over two years after its initial slated release date. Of course, sliding into cinemas in the middle of a pandemic did nothing other than force this further into the obscurity it already seemed somewhat destined to become engulfed by, so it's perhaps natural that the picture feels like a bit of a myth. This feeling is furthered by the fact that its planned sequels were scrapped, likely due to its unsatisfactory box-office performance and the structural changes occurring in the wake of the Disney/Fox merger, and that it occupies this bizarre limbo wherein it's sort of the last 'X-Men' film but it's also not really an 'X-Men' film in any widely recognisable way. As such, it's the sort of thing that you usually unceremoniously scroll past on Disney+, and I doubt many people would ever stumble across its actual play button if it wasn't for its fairly tenuous link to its wider franchise and the platform's ability to group it together with those more popular pictures. If that wasn't enough, the people who actually have watched it don't tend to have all that much to say about it, let alone anything particularly good.
As you can probably tell, I wasn't exactly optimistic about the flick's chances of being better than its reputation. Thankfully, I underestimated it. Is it too far to say I was pleasantly surprised to discover that it's fine? Maybe. It is faint praise, after all. But I won't deny that I like the film far more than most people seem to. There are fair few elements that are at least interesting, and the piece is conceptually sound. While it initially feels as though it's going to fall into the trap of queerbaiting its audience, it eventually fully embraces the same-sex relationship between two of its central characters. Not only is it incredibly important (and even quite groundbreaking), their romance is sweetly written, tenderly performed and wholly believable. The movie is rather unconventional in the themes it aims to tackle, at least when it comes to superhero stuff, because it tries to ground each of its characters' suffering in deep-rooted trauma that's generally pretty dark for this kind of material. It aims to have the kids overcome their past abuses or accidental power mishaps by having them bond and undergo a subtle kind of talk therapy through their budding friendship built upon the shared experience of being locked (or, as the doctor puts it, sequestered) and studied in a so-called medical facility apparently for their own safety. This focus on character is relatively refreshing (although the feature's decision to reuse some limited footage from 'Logan (2017)' doesn't do it any favours considering it draws a comparison to perhaps the one 'X-Men' movie more unashamedly character-centric than it aspires to be), and I appreciate the decision to put everything else on the backburner in an effort to boost its impact.
However, this last point is also perhaps the picture's biggest problem. If you're going to sacrifice everything - including immersive atmosphere, exciting spectacle and (most crucially considering how the film was marketed) unsettling horror - for the sake of character work, you better make sure that character work is done as well as it possibly can be. Sadly, it just isn't. It's clumsy and conventional and also really rushed, with each of the eponymous mutants seeming to overcome their issues by simply telling someone about their darkest memory. In theory, that's not such a bad thing: advocating for therapy and talking through your trauma is a legitimately good message, after all. In practice, though, it's far less satisfying than it should be because the affair often stacks these scenes up more-or-less one after the other, leading to an oddly repetitive pacing that makes everything seem like one long exercise in some sort of macabre one-upmanship. Plus, it has no idea what to do with this stuff once it's out in the open, so sort of just forgets about it and has its heroes make use of the powers they were unable to master prior to, I guess, mastering their emotions. One of the backstories is shrouded in mystery, seemingly so that it can be explored in detail as a sort of twist later on. This teased reveal never occurs, and we're left to assume what actually happened in a way that doesn't feel so much ambiguous as it does accidental. It's emblematic of the movie's scrappy editing, which implies it was chopped and changed quite a bit in post (indeed, it was meant to undergo reshoots due to poor test screenings but it's unclear whether or not these reshoots actually happened or whether they were cancelled due to the Disney/Fox merger). The director has admitted to finding the shoot stressful as he felt unable to fully embrace the film's horror elements. Yes, as I implied earlier, this is - or, at least, was - supposed to be a horror movie. The underlying idea is that the mutants are all experiencing mysterious visions that dredge up their deepest fears and force them to relive their worst moments, which is what prompts them to actually face their inner demons in the first place. The problem is that none of these moments are scary, and the suspense of what's causing them is totally skewered by the picture's tendency to cut to shots that feature on-screen text that basically screams "this is the source of the visions!". This hand-holding approach is really weird considering this is meant to be a more adult (albeit PG-13) effort, as is the fact that the final result shies so far away from being frightening that it can barely be classed as a horror experience at all (despite its upsetting elements) and is actually a little bit less scary than some previous 'X-Men' outings.
Anyway, the point is that the affair sacrifices so much stuff in order to focus on its character development, but it can't even do that to a truly satisfying degree. Although though the affair itself isn't ever exactly boring, there are large stretches of the narrative where nothing really engaging happens. It's a shame, too, because there are some decent ideas here that could have been really enjoyable if they were more refined. With more frequent set-pieces, be they action or horror, and a properly moody atmosphere, this could have been really distinct and equally as compelling. As it is, it just feels somewhat inconsequential and never truly grips you. It's a decent enough viewing experience, though, despite its flaws. It might not sound that way, but it is. While it isn't as engaging as you'd hope, is generally a little too slow for its own good (even at around 90 minutes in length), and suffers from a strange sense of isolation that is thematically apt but almost certainly accidental (why are there only five kids and one doctor at this institute? The narrative never provides a convincing reason), it's totally watchable fluff with a few enjoyable set-pieces, some relatively solid character work and muted yet dependable performances. Its same-sex relationship is sort of revolutionary and is really nice to see, too. It's genuinely not a bad effort, even though it's not exactly a good one either. It's alright.