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Borderlands (2024)
Craptrap. Borderline terrible.
HBO's The Last of Us and Prime's Fallout are two rare examples of video game adaptations handled well, with respect for the source material and its gamers. However, this recent streak of solid video game adaptations has led many into a false sense of security, especially to those thinking the days of derivative and poorly realised adaptations was over.
Unfortunately but perhaps unsurprisingly, Borderlands is exactly that: another derivative and poorly realised adaptation. You are likely to be disappointed even if you have no knowledge of the franchise in which this is loosely based. If nothing else this was a discount Guardians of the Galaxy, except this is joyless and soulless in equal measure. Tonally, it replicates nothing of the video game, with shoddy special effects and jokes that fall flat in the mud.
The film's ragtag bunch of characters are also beyond annoying and barely resemble their pixelated counterparts. Collectively they share about as much desperately needed chemistry as a glass of tepid tap water. Jack Black's incessant Claptrap gets one or two amusing moments whilst the normally dependable Cate Blanchett was the only one who appeared to be having fun as Lilith, even if Borderlands squanders her talent. Blanchett is perhaps the only reason I can just about give this anything more than a 1/10 rating.
But what did you really expect? It went through development and post-production hell for two years with Eli Roth who isn't a good director. Kevin Hart was sorely miscast as Roland, the trailers instilled no confidence and perhaps worst of all they made this a 12A when the video games are rated 18. It was never going to be good, but really it turned out to be borderline terrible.
Monkey Man (2024)
Huh, I never thought he'd really do that
I never would have thought for even one moment he truly had it in him, however, Dev Patel (you know that mild-mannered actor from Lion and The Best Exotic Marigold Hotel) has ultimately proven himself to be a visceral director and versatile action star with Monkey Man, an allegorical and hyper-violent revenge thriller set in the sordid criminal underbelly of Mumbai, India. Whilst the formula certainly isn't reinvented here, Monkey Man is, if nothing else, a riotous, gratuitously violent and well-acted thriller, even if it's not entirely what you expect.
Inevitably, comparisons will be made to the John Wick franchise, but to make such parallels would be largely unfair. Yes, the fight choreography is less slick, hindered I think by the overuse of shaky cam which muddies the level of detail (post-John Wick there's really no excuse for this), but the action in the context of the film's story of revenge, feels a lot more gritty and personal.
Deeply flawed however, is the film's half-baked commentary on polarising matters in India, including poverty and its treatment of religious minorities. I felt like this had a lot to say, but didn't really say anything. Look past that and you should have a good time.
The Grand Tour: The Grand Tour: Sand Job (2024)
The beginning of the end of the road
Unsubtle scripted moments and ridiculous set pieces aside, this latest journey from the ageing trio, across the desolate country of Mauritania, is a welcome return to form and is quite possibly their most wholesome special since their adventure across Mongolia all the way back in season 3.
No words can emphasise the masterclass of cinematography on display here, whilst the Jag, Aston and Maserati all deserve to become vehicle icons of The Grand Tour. And twenty years later, Clarkson & Co still continue to entertain with their dependable chemistry and old-school wit, two things subsequent and desperate iterations of Top Gear have woefully failed to replicate.
There are very few surprises in this for sure, but Sand Job serves to remind us why there is still no replacing the likes of Clarkson, Hammond and May, even after more than twenty years. Each special (yes some are better and worse than others) offers that overly familiar warm feeling, like reconnecting with good friends you haven't seen for some time.
The worst part is knowing all this is coming to a dead end as there is only one episode left. However, I do think it's time to end The Grand Tour and for them to drive off into the sunset. I really hope the final episode is a culmination and celebration of everything that has made The Grand Tour and classic episodes of Top Gear so memorable. I think this penultimate special is the start of that culmination.
Heart of Stone (2023)
Fart of Stone
Apologies for the juvenile and unsophisticated title of this review but Heart of Stone is absolute guff. I cannot comprehend how this arrived on the same studio conveyor belt as the latest Mission: Impossible film.
Gal Gadot once again stars in another unintelligent Netflix nonstarter as Rachel Stone, who is sadly as bland as her generic hero's name suggests. Stone is sent on a mission to retrieve a typically powerful MacGuffin from falling dangerously into the wrong hands. Yawn.
On a dull weekend, this is watchable enough one time. But really, this is a totally joyless and emotionless experience, a mostly mundane spy thriller with no memorable action whatsoever, except for perhaps a totally far-fetched sequence on board an airship. It's all slickly filmed but soulless, boring and devoid of any high-stakes tension.
The supporting characters are bland, too: another Netflix alum, Mathias Schweighofer, appears throughout in jarring scenes reminiscent of John Anderson from Minority Report, whilst Jamie Dornan's villain (everyone saw that twist coming) who is about as menacing as a pink poodle, has all the depth of a puddle in a heatwave. Alia Bhatt is also dreadful and simply miscast as another secondary antagonist.
There's just nothing remotely interesting for the viewer and even less so for Gal Gadot, who is left to pick at the bony carcass of a mediocre film that was never meaty enough to begin with.
The Last of Us: Infected (2023)
"Oops"
The Last of Us episode two titled Infected, is a tense and compelling follow-up to last week's harrowing prologue and once again proves very similar to events of the original game (with many fun Easter eggs), despite some significant changes to the lore of the infected and the spread of the disease.
Unlike the game, in which letters and newspaper clippings only allude to the origins of the Cordyceps outbreak, we instead get a chilling and fascinating flashback to 2003 Jakarta where a justifiably nervous mycologist inspects a victim of Patient Zero. The end of civilisation we learn, began in Indonesia.
Fast-forward again to 2023 as we follow Joel, Tess and Ellie on their way to the rendezvous on the outskirts of post-apocalyptic Boston. With strong I Am Legend vibes, the details of this alternate decaying world are meticulous, the settings impressive and undoubtedly expensive - AMC would have had The Walking Dead spend an entire season here to justify the budget HBO has at its disposal. The clickers come alive in hideously realised glory.
This is arguably Tess' episode. I really enjoyed the chemistry and the motherly dynamic she gets to share with Ellie (who I will say is a little too abrasive for my liking currently) as well as her contrast with Joel. The writers however, once again squander the opportunity to develop Tess' backstory and make her something more than a narrative third wheel. Her infection and "that kiss", whilst gnarly and shocking, does nothing overall to enhance the emotional impact of her later heroic death, especially when we compare her demise to Sarah or even Tess in the original game; and that's because we don't get enough time with her like we do in the game. "Oops" indeed.
This is still a very good episode, but it did feel rushed overall and should've been longer. I'm now very slightly concerned this season is only 9 episodes when it was originally conceived as 10.
The Last of Us: When You're Lost in the Darkness (2023)
The Prologue
I've played The Last of Us at least five times and more recently the Part One remaster. The series premiere opens a lot like the acclaimed game with scenes and dialogue very nearly identical to the harrowing and emotional events of the prologue (the farmhouse ablaze, Sarah's POV in Tommy's truck, the streets of Austin gripped by chaos and confusion).
Unlike the game however, the viewer gets to spend a significant amount of time with the Millers before the beginning of the world's end. The family dynamic is clearly shown through the eyes of Sarah with subtle hints of civilisation slowly crumbling as she goes about her day as normal which, as a gamer I thought was oddly fascinating to watch as the dread begins to seep in. The smaller details, from Sarah's shirt to Tommy's truck, to the interiors of the Boston QZ and more, meticulously mirror the game.
But what of the actors? The game's narrative is driven by emotion, violence, mature themes and the robust chemistry shared between Joel and Ellie on their perilous journey. Who HBO would cast was of paramount importance here; whilst Pedro Pascal would not have been my first choice for the role of Joel (personally, I would've preferred Josh Brolin), Pascal ultimately makes the character his own and plays Joel with grit, complexity and convincing devastation.
I was also very dubious of Bella Ramsey's casting as Ellie for mostly shallow reasoning. However, Ramsey thankfully encapsulates almost everything about Ellie's distinct personality and mannerisms. Interestingly, I can't say the same for Anna Torv's Tess, who oddly lacks the overall steely determination of her video game counterpart.
If you're new to this story, you'll likely agree this is everything The Walking Dead wished it was. I don't know if this will please all fans of the original game, especially those who will have gripes about the casting choices or don't want any changes to stray too far from the game. I'd like to say I'm cautiously satisfied with what I've seen so far but of course it remains to be seen with how HBO deals with other pivotal moments from the game.
Black Adam (2022)
Dwayne Johnson is the hero DC needs but not the hero Warner Bros deserve
The DC Extended Universe has so far proven to be an inconsistent mess; and Warner Bros have been beyond parody at replicating the winner formula used by Marvel. Finally, that might be about to change with Black Adam, which is (mostly) a success in course correction for the DCEU.
Firstly, Black Adam plays a lot like the passion project it was for Dwayne Johnson. Sure, The Rock's interpretation of the character is comically inaccurate but he makes the character his own, playing the title antihero with refreshing brutality and stoic menace. It's certainly a lot of fun to watch Black Adam as we follow him on his quest for revenge and unorthodox justice. And speaking of justice, we are finally introduced to the Justice Society and Pierce Brosnan absolutely steals every scene as Doctor Fate.
So far, so good but here come the criticisms. The first is slow motion. This hasn't been cool since The Matrix but DC continues with its incessant use in Black Adam. The story is fairly weak, the villain even weaker. The teenaged members of the Justice Society, with of course the exception of Fate and Hawk Man, are criminally underused and poorly realised despite the decent chemistry they share.
The action, along with a heavy overdose of CGI, also has the lowest stakes possible: you never once get the impression Black Adam is in any real sense of danger which zaps some of the excitement from the otherwise fun action sequences.
That aside, Black Adam sets up a new and exciting pathway for the DCEU to follow. He's the hero DC need but not the one Warner Bros deserve. Be sure to stay for the mid credit scene...
Jurassic World Dominion (2022)
Jurassic World: Dumbinion
Jurassic World: Dominion feels like the most expensive fan-made film ever put to cinema. There's an overdose of nostalgia and good visuals to be had and many fun nods to to the original. Sam Neill and Laura Dern also make their long awaited (and welcome) return to the franchise and the chemistry they share is nice, it's as if no time has passed at all since Jurassic Park.
However, their return serves only to remind us why this sixth instalment has absolutely nothing on the original Spielberg classic. Simply put, the chemistry shared between Neill, Dern and Jeff Goldblum is not nearly enough to distract from Dominion's awfully dumb story, truly naff dialogue ("I promise I'm gonna get her back!") and the noticeably bored performances of Pratt and Dallas Howard.
In fact, unlike the original Jurassic Park, this is a lot more bore than awe. The action totally jumps the raptor, too, with the lowest stakes possible. You just know Owen Toretto and the gang are going to survive each and every dinosaur encounter which totally devours any tension. There's no horror, barely any excitement of any kind.
I really wanted to like this but as a legacy sequel, Top Gun: Maverick this is not. Couple all of the above with a runtime as long as the Cretaceous period itself and you get a rather disappointing end to the World trilogy and the Jurassic franchise as a whole.
Top Gun: Maverick (2022)
I cannot recommend this enough
Top Gun (1986) is a classic slice of feel-good cheese but it's also very dated; and I was always skeptical of this sequel before release. Maverick however, is totally awesome and is a hell of a lot better than it has any right to be.
At nearly 60, Tom Cruise still knows a thing or two about making an exciting, purely old-school summer blockbuster and Maverick delivers and more. If ever there was a reason to see a film in IMAX this is it: the stunts, aerial combat scenes and cinematography are undoubtedly impressive, more so I think than Christopher Nolan's Dunkirk.
Everything is bigger and louder for sure but Maverick still retains the heart, emotion, thrills and feel-good spirit of the original whilst being superior to that film in every way possible. All of the characters are likeable, too, and there's also a touching cameo with Val Kilmer's Iceman.
I've seen this three times now and I cannot recommend seeing it enough. It's like slipping on an old leather jacket before riding off into the sunset on your vintage Kawasaki motorcycle. It's just a damn cool film.
Pig (2021)
Cage: Pig in the City
I was intrigued by Pig's compelling premise and the atmospheric trailers; and Pig, at first glance, appears to borrow from the original plot of John Wick (just swap dog for hog). That's where the similarities end however, because this is a slowly delicate story of grief, of loneliness and resurgence in the world.
Nicolas Cage, in perhaps the most un-Nicolas Cage film of his - shall we say varied - career, gives a sensitive and emotionally quiet performance as Robin Feld, a once revered chef who now lives a semi-nomadic lifestyle with his beloved foraging pig in the Oregon wilderness.
Cage is excellent and is backed up in almost equal measure by Jumanji's Alex Wolff. However, despite its themes and the display of acting talent involved, I came away from this feeling hollow. Sarnoski had a lot to say but ultimately says nothing at all with ideas that are half-cooked and never fully realised, all in a drama that's way too short at nearly 80 mins.
I think if you want to see Nicolas Cage deliver a strikingly, unusually calm performance I would recommend you watch this. But for everyone else there's not much to unpack here and a lot less to care about.
After Life: Episode #3.6 (2022)
Life goes on. Because it has to.
I'll miss After Life. I will miss the compelling drama. I'll miss the ridiculous characters but most of all I'll miss the wise and meaningful park bench conversations between Ricky Gervais and the wonderful Penelope Wilton.
I don't know how but for 18 episodes After Life somehow managed to balance Gervais' unsubtle humour along with visceral emotion and a deeply delicate exploration of grief and loneliness.
This final episode was something quite special. Sure, it's all wrapped up a little too easily but nonetheless the ending is thoughtful, bittersweet and offers hope to all of us with meaningful interpretations. As Tony and Brandy fade away we are reminded that, whilst life does indeed go on without us, every end is a new beginning.
I'd also like to add this is the only TV series to make me choke with tears. Curse you Ricky Gervais!
Spider-Man: No Way Home (2021)
With great powers comes a great film
I give infinite credit to the writers and producers at Sony (and Disney). They knew exactly what the fans wanted and likewise expected; and No Way Home delivers beyond the enormous hype. Not since Captain America wielded Thor's hammer in Endgame has a cinema erupted with such joy and vivacious cheering.
And never have I smiled so much: NWH is bursting with delightful chemistry, Easter eggs, truly impeccable fan service and a never ending supply of fun and emotion in equal measure, all of which helps to elevate NWH in becoming the most joyous and ambitious entry in the MCU thus far.
Spider Man has truly become something of an icon; and No Way Home, if nothing else, is a jubilant celebration of Peter Parker and his alter ego, including both his comic and onscreen iterations (past and present).
9.5/10.
Night Teeth (2021)
Night Dentures
The ridiculously titled Night Teeth is all bark and no bite; it's oddly timid and lacks all the thrills and blood-soaked violence you'd normally come to expect from this genre.
This is essentially Collateral with vampires. However, its thinly-veiled story stubbornly hints at something far more interesting to come, only it never happens. More time was definitely needed to create the lore in which humans and vampires have fought and coexisted for centuries. Annoyingly, any nibbles of tension you anticipate in becoming fully-fledged action curiously goes on to occur offscreen, which sucks any incentive to keep watching.
Night Teeth is indeed very stylish and slickly directed by Adam Randall. The City of Angels comes alive at night with moody neon lights and sprawling views across the LA skyline. But it's nothing you haven't seen before in countless other better films. It's a shame this is all style and no substance because Night Teeth really did have potential to be decent.
Sure, the cast is quite charming but Alfie Allen's Victor is about as menacing as a pink poodle, whilst Megan Fox and Sydney Sweeney are criminally underused, given only thankless cameos as two very sexy vampire overlords. In fact, when the only highlight of a film is a Megan Fox cameo you know you're in trouble...
No Time to Die (2021)
Stupidly brave or bravely stupid?
The writers did the unthinkable here. Until its last moments, No Time was an improvement on Spectre, with high-stakes and kinetic action, music by Hans Zimmer and beautiful locations. Ana de Armas was a franchise standout whilst Daniel Craig, as ever, was dependable once more as 007.
However, not nearly of that is enough because it all ends with the insane decision to kill off Bond. I can only imagine this was Craig's idea as producer to bring some finality to his version of the legendary super spy but it's very controversial nonetheless. Stupidly brave or bravely stupid? You decide.
For me it's the latter. The problem for me is every moment since Casino Royale had led to THAT ending and I don't believe it's the outcome most fans wanted. Bond always finds a convoluted way to escape the inescapable. That's what makes Bond well...Bond! The writers could have borrowed the ending of Extraction with Chris Hemsworth.
Malek and Christoph Waltz deserved so much better. The writers should be utterly ashamed of themselves for squandering the Oscar winning talents of Waltz not only once but twice, as he gets nothing more than a thankless credited cameo as Blofeld. Malek doesn't fare much better as Safin, a villain with all the depth of a puddle in a heatwave. Seriously, what exactly were his motivations for world domination?
Remarkably this did not feel like a Bond film in the traditional sense either. Overall, this was missing the aura of classiness associated with the franchise. Bond, too, I felt, seemed like a sidekick in his own film. Even if you're okay with that you still have to contend with the soapy melodrama, on-the-nose dialogue and wasted villains. Lea Seydoux and Daniel Craig share even less chemistry in this than they do in Spectre.
Bittersweet: Daniel Craig has proved to be an excellent James Bond. Craig is 100% not to blame for any problems with this franchise over the past fifteen years; whoever replaces him has ginormous boots to fill. But this feels like the end of an era which makes No Time to Die all the more a travesty.
Till Death (2021)
Have I entered the Twilight Zone?
This is a good Megan Fox film. There, I said it. I realise however, this probably doesn't mean anything. After all, with TMNT and Rogue, Fox's acting career has nosedived faster than a kamikaze pilot ever since those comments made about Michael Bay.
Is film in any way groundbreaking? The short answer is no. But this is an entertaining home invasion thriller that's quite silly but has enough suspense and narrative twists to hold your attention for a breezy 80 minutes; and Fox, much to anyone's surprise, holds her own with a physically impressive performance, in a film with a small cast and an even smaller budget.
So yeah...a good Megan Fox film and a good directional debut from SK Dale. I've clearly entered the Twilight Zone...
Clarkson's Farm (2021)
What could possibly go wrong?
Jeremy Clarkson finally gets his own show on Amazon Prime. It's a show about farming and agriculture. What could possibly go wrong? Everything it seems, at least where Clarkson and farming is concerned.
Really, this is 8 hours of Clarkson trying to convince us and himself that farming isn't difficult; and despite one or two glaringly scripted moments, Clarkson's Farm eventually blossoms to become insightful, thoughtful, silly and light-hearted entertainment.
From sheep shearing to harvest preparation, Clarkson highlights the hardships of running a farm with some tragically hilarious results. It's infinitely more watchable than that dreadful desert island flop with Richard Hammond which was horribly scripted and dubiously unfunny at best.
Army of the Dead (2021)
It's fun. Nothing more nothing less.
For the most part you should bet all in for a good time because Army of the Dead is a riotous, gratuitous, gleefully over-the-top zombie thriller overloaded with guts, gore and visual flair. The plot is also irresistibly ludicrous. Think Aliens or Ocean's Eleven with zombies and you've pretty much got the gist. The whole package on display here is fun and utterly bonkers. Nothing more nothing less.
However, this being a Zack Snyder film, you should expect the usual frustrations, namely a lack of character development and a bum-numbing runtime. It's not without its other niggles, too. Following a strong opening credits sequence, pacing problems make way for a predictable introduction to an array of thinly veiled characters, all of whom appear to be discount versions of Burke and Vasquez from Aliens. It's clear to me the majority of this cast were picked for their collectively distinctive looks and little else.
Army of the Dead is also riddled with plot holes...and annoying character deaths. Take the largely insignificant character of Chambers for example. After she's led astray into a trap set by Martin, she amasses a totally badass 50 kill streak before being left for dead by her crew, including her sharpshooter best friend who does nothing to save her when there was ample opportunity to do so. WTF!? This was annoying and an unnecessary attempt to maintain the story's vague and far-fetched mystery. Chambers deserved better.
Look, I still stand by what I said. Army of the Dead is fun. Nothing more nothing less. There's no need for a Snyder cut of this film. For better or worse, this is a Zack Snyder film through and through; it's one of his better works since Watchmen (2009) and maybe enough to win over some of the stubborn Snyder skeptics.
Banshee (2013)
The best show no one was watching
Until seeing Antony Starr in Amazon's The Boys, I had never heard of Banshee. Though the opposite of a sophisticated watch, Banshee is a tv show entirely like no other: it's a fast-paced, ultra-violent and doesn't contain a single dull episode.
Banshee's a mix of Prison Break and John Wick thrown in for good measure. Ultimately, you experience Banshee for the fight scenes, all of which are tense, brutal and expertly choreographed (the fight between Nola and Burton in season 3 is a particular series standout).
But Banshee isn't all about the bloody fisticuffs and countless shootouts. You've got lovable characters (Hood, Job), equally deplorable villains (Proctor and Burton), gripping suspense, unpredictable narratives and one liners aplenty, all of which helps to culminate in an absolute rare gem of a television series that I really wish I had discovered years ago. This really was the best show no one was watching!
The Grand Tour: The Grand Tour Presents: A Massive Hunt (2020)
A swashbuckling but slightly soulless return to form
After what feels like an eternity, Clarkson, Hammond and May finally return for a swashbuckling adventure set in Madagascar. After the disappointment of last year's Seamen, this special felt like a proper adventure and mostly proves to be a return to form for our trio.
However, I can't help but notice that Clarkson & Co are really starting to show their age now. Sadly, and it happens to the best of us, they look old and truly haggard - the long hiatus since Seamen really hasn't helped.
Please don't get me wrong, I enjoyed this special, even if it was a little devoid of soul, whilst the May's Caterham was an impressive standout in its own right. However, this special really wasn't good enough to justify one annual episode, even in light of the pandemic. I also don't see how much longer these three can continue with the gruelling specials.
Honestly, I wish they had continued with the studio format albeit with a reduced episode count. I still look forward to the next special, which has apparently already finished filming in Scotland.
The Devil All the Time (2020)
Punishing yet satisfying
The Devil All The Time is a dark southern gothic thriller set in the ominous backwoods of post-Second World War America. The novel's author Donald Ray Pollock, here serves as an incessant narrator for a bleak and depressing tale of religion, murder and retribution.
For those who haven't read the novel, the ensemble cast is the real draw here: everybody from Bill Skarsgard and Robert Pattinson, even in their limited roles, are truly superb. But their characters merely orbit around the standout star that is Spider Man's Tom Holland, who plays Arvin Russell with a surprising level of maturity and emotional subtlety that's deserving of a few acting nominations.
The Devil All The Time, with its pressure cooker pacing, jumbled narrative and array of despicably complex characters, is not for an easy watch. Brutal and disturbing, the film is both satisfying and punishing in equal measure.
Greyhound (2020)
Pays homage to an overlooked battle of WWII
Tom Hanks very rarely disappoints. Compared to his previous WWII outings (Saving Private Ryan, Band of Brothers), Greyhound is a proudly modest naval thriller - very nicely shot, absent of cliches, with a fast pace, stoic acting and no overuse of cheap special effects.
Greyhound has very little story and even less character development. Did this film require the talents and caliber of Tom Hanks? Probably not. Greyhound, at 90 minutes, is a short, simple, straight-talking war film that pays homage to the Battle of the Atlantic, an integral but largely overlooked part of the war. Meticulous in its detail and overloaded with naval jargon, Greyhound is both unassuming and realistic without ever once being boring.
I had planned to watch this at the cinema but I'm glad I watched this on Apple TV. It's the perfect film to watch with your grand(dad) on a lazy Sunday afternoon.
Defending Jacob: After (2020)
Defending this series
Defending Jacob is a gripping legal thriller and not, as you might have expected, a traditional murder mystery. But for those who didn't read the novel, I can understand the frustration and why you may feel cheated by the show's ominous (and different) ending, especially since episodes 5-6 suffer from cliched family melodrama and a lack of progression.
However, just like the book we are left to speculate as to what really happened to Ben Rifkin; and we assume it was (probably) Jacob that murdered him. This was indeed, an interesting drama, complete with a good score, stellar acting and moody cinematography, all of which helps to elevate Defending Jacob above other crime dramas.
The shocking ending however, is remarkably different from the book, a clear creative decision perhaps; It will be interesting to see whether Apple decides to renew this for a second season in a fashion similar to Big Little Lies, especially as Defending Jacob is the studio's first big hit following several misses since it's launch in November. I'm just not entirely sure if I would watch it...
6 Underground (2019)
This should be buried deep underground
Michael Bay's 6 Underground has every single crash, bang and wallop any desensitised moviegoer could possibly ask for. Everything about this film is a vicious assault on the senses akin to the D-Day invasion of Normandy. I swear that every noise of the universe is in this 'movie'.
An expensive advert for Alfa Romeo, 6 Underground is barely a movie; despite a strong opening sequence, the film is completely riddled with all the typical trademarks of a classically trashy Michael Bay picture, complete with gratuitous violence, loud explosions, choppy editing, disastrous dialogue and a threadbare story.
Before you say anything, I know exactly what I expect of Bay and his brainless movies. His projects are not hard to enjoy if you leave your brain at the door before watching. However, there was something so off about this, something so deeply vulgar and crass, that I just couldn't enjoy it even when I did switch off.
I can only just about bring myself to give 6 Underground a maximum of two stars for the flashy cars and the normally dependable Ryan Reynolds and Melanie Laurent. But it's still a deeply unpleasant experience with all the subtlety of a magnitude 9 earthquake; for that reason and the other reasons above, this film should be buried deep underground for all eternity.
The Man in the High Castle: Fire from the Gods (2019)
An excellent and compelling final season let down by questionable ending
Firstly, I would like to start this review by giving huge credit to Amazon Prime, the writers and producers for giving us an explicitly detailed and chillingly plausible portrayal of an alternate world where the Nazis and the Japanese won the war against America and its allies. If nothing else, this series has always been truly fascinating to watch.
However, High Castle has always proved to be a slow burning thriller, even ploddingly paced at times; and I can understand why viewers abandoned watching this series altogether after season 2. For those who were resilient enough to watch the forty episodes spanning four years and four seasons, the ending is a mixture of big rewards and bittersweet disappointment.
Despite some convenient plot holes, strange character absences (what happened to Ed and Natalie?) and questionable character decisions, this series is mostly let down by a questionable act that occurs only in the final minute, the details of which I will not give away. Just be aware that it raises a lot more questions than it does answers; and that is something that is unacceptable for a series finale. Whilst it's nowhere near as bad as the GoT finale, it's still a shame because season 4 was this series at its most dramatic, unpredictable and compelling.
6.5/10
Midway (2019)
Michael Bay's Pearl Harbour was a masterpiece after all
Midway is a (mostly) hollow and impersonal dramatisation of an integral Pacific battle of WWII. At times, Midway is a soulless experience that lacks even the faintest flicker of a visual flair. I have never liked Bay's grossly inaccurate Pearl Harbour (2001) but at least that had panache! Here, viewers are taken through the events of December 1941 as a vessel to explain how it led up to the Battle of Midway in June 1942.
On paper at least, Roland Emmerich, as the master of disaster, was probably the right man to handle and choreograph the carnage that happened at Midway. However, there's a jarring overuse of shoddy Chinese CGI that desperately lacks the practical authenticity of Christopher Nolan's Dunkirk. The special effects however, are not nearly as distracting as miscast Ed Skrein's horribly dubious New Jersey accent or likewise, Woody Harrelson's wig. Characters are threadbare, impersonal and underdeveloped. Harrelson, Mandy Moore and Dennis Quaid are all fine in their thankless roles but others like Aaron Eckhart are utterly wasted. Not only that but the dialogue is conventional and expositional at best and absolutely toe-curling at its worst.
It's not all terrible though! Firstly, the runtime is mercifully shorter than Pearl Harbour and absent of all love triangles. The action is, on occasions quite exciting, whilst it's also, for the most part, historically accurate and vividly detailed. The Japanese, too, are handled well and unlike their American onscreen counterparts, are not presented as cheesy caricatures of themselves.
But none of that is not nearly enough to outweigh the criticisms, which is a shame because Midway is an important story of WWII that deserves to be told, just like Dunkirk, D-Day, Stalingrad and the Battle of the Bulge. Emmerich, despite his mature efforts, was not the right man to tell this story.
4.5/10