didn't expect to see t-pain in a pup hood but it did have an effect on me

a customer returned a drink because a fly flew into it and said: “one of your flies flew into my drink” and my coworker was so confused that they just said: “…my fly?”

oh, right, the fly, the fly for the drink, the fly chosen specifically to fly into the drink, the drink's fly

Gronk pull the level

I LOVE THIS SONG

You dumb motherfucker life isn't about smelling flowers or feeling radiant sunshine on your skin or making meals with your loved ones. You idiot son of a bitch. It's about apps. It's about scrolling through apps.

what am i being advertised here exactly

follow me twitter / facebook

Depression meal 001

Nap for lunch

@creatures-in-posts

These creatures are splooting

does anyone know how to do more than one task a day

HELP i’m sitting at an outdoor cafe and this lady was at another table next to me and the barista called my name and I stood up to walk ten feet to grab my drink and the lady JUMPED up and LUNGED over to my table and took my seat????? i’m not even gonna say anything bc I’m so confused. they’re virtually the same tables with the same views and amount of sunlight etc.

decided the funniest possible response was to just sit back down at the table with her. She’s not looking at me.

she just got up to get her coffee and put her purse and jacket and hat down to save her seat. this is so funny what kind of world does she live in?? anyway we’re just sharing a table now.

ppl keep suggesting she’s neurodivergent and ‘needed’ that table for whatever reason. I’m Autistic & ADHD so I can sympathize with that but she could have asked LMAO. I CANNOT stress enough that as soon as my butt was out of my seat she quite literally lunged for it like we were the finalists in a game of Musical Chairs & the prize was one million dollars

THANK YOU!!! This always rubs me the wrong way!! When someone is rude and ppl immediately assume they’re Autistic, the implication is that u think Autistic people are all rude!

Im not autistic about cars or makes or models but I AM autistic about crumple points and field of vision and blindspots and conflict points. do you understand. urban design, anti car dependency/anti car centric infrastructure, and so cars themselves are part of that interest. because car design is urban design. cybertrucks SUCK as cars and also dont function well in infrastructure thats designed to care about people. there are good cars and vehicles that are designed good and fit well with good urban design

THIS is how im autistic about cars

the funniest thing about new american trucks is that i was driving last week and saw someone with a dirt bike in the back and they had to have the tail gate propped open becuase the truck bed wasn’t long enough. the dirt bike was not that big. it was funny. you bought that car justifying to yourself that it’s a work horse, a ute. it doesn’t fit a 250cc bike brother

chiming in to point out that forward visibility in full-size american pickups is uh. not great.

I have PERSONALLY had to move/haul heavy shit a lot and the vans with the short noses beat the hell out of the pickups, except for when you’re off-roading/in mud and in that case it’s a matter of low center of gravity + 4wd that really keeps you moving (which a lot of older trucks, being smaller & lower, do a HELL of a lot better.) I have had to GET OUT OF MY CAR and peer around these behemoth trucks parked on streets so that I can see enough to pull out of a driveway. Pedestrian deaths in the US are going UP, and as a person too short to be seen over the hood of one of these fucking things, they need to NOT be a “consumer ‘car’ of choice”.

in season 3 🙂‍↕️🙂‍↕️🙂‍↕️

girl is that a 9/11 in your pocket. or is your penis just two ofd them and exploding

you just hate my 2 exploding penises.

roses, bel air… XX