Hello world. This is Violet138 (on AO3)'s Tumblr account. This blog is mostly Batman stuff, and kind of a mess that will occasionally clog your dash. Thanks :)
Also! Just because this has come up enough, I am atrocious with tone and cannot always identify sarcasm, so if I give you a bizarre response to something I apologize in advance.
If Clark is the one proposing to Bruce: *simply asks for Alfred's blessing since he's the closest Bruce has to a father figure*
If Bruce is the one proposing to Clark: *prepares a resume AND a PowerPoint presentation detailing his academic background, achievements, work experiences & why he'd make a suitable partner for Clark*
Okay that's a little hilarious. I do feel like Clark would ask around for the kids' permissions too though and all of those little brats would be delighted to help red herring Bruce regarding the proposal.
Bruce would never get away with not asking the Kents permission, and if by some Vegas wedding shenanigans he didn't, their first stop would be the Kent farm lol.
I think Bruce would open up his ridiculous presentation and miss the fact that Clark said yes before the title page even popped up. Also I think Bruce and Clark have such a long history that it's a complete mystery to everyone why Bruce would do this, because Clark truly knows everything (Bruce was so incredibly nervous).
If anything it's Clark's past that Alfred hires a PI for.
Jason ought to be stubbornly analog where Tim is enthusiastically digital. Tim is impossible to hack because he is very much up to date and on top of cybersecurity. Jason is impossible to hack because you can’t hack a shovel.
Our World's Finest if hollywood actually cared about us
ok ive seen like 3 variants of it and i have to speak my truth. hot take but superman is NOT the one wanting batman to call him a good boy and crying when he says he won't. he's a bitch all the time!!! superman is NOT expecting any sort of compliment out of him. it's the other way around y'all. batman is secretly desperate for superman's approval and will brood on a rooftop for 5 days straight if superman tells him he disappointed him. bffr
i don’t think u understand it is so important to me that dickie grayson is the shortest and physically weakest of any team that he’s on while simultaneously being the most unsettling person in the room
Green Lantern #13 - "Defenses Down" (2024)
written by Jeremy Adams art by Fernando Pasarin, Oclair Abert, & Romulo Fajardo, Jr.
NEAT
Either need to write a fic/find the fic or find the comic panel where Superbat fake an argument in front of the League for... some narrative purpose or other (finding a traitor or fooling an enemy) because it would be so funny if rather than the official business dispute script they'd written prior they both get way too into it and unleash their true thoughts, which come across extremely convincingly like an old married couple, complete with references to the dog, their shared kid, emotional unavailability, et cetera.
This leads Diana and Hal to decide to do some couples counselling. And other plot events *waves hand* they beat the bad guy... they kiss or something I don't know.
The Batkids probably suck at parallel parking, not because Bruce didn't teach them, but because most of the time they're driving a car that makes room on the road as needed or leaps over things.
did you call the joke reagan made for gorbachev... a really old meme?
Okay firstly, I've been laughing about this ask for around fifteen minutes because I cannot possibly make heads or tails about the tone. Are you reverent? Horrifed? On board? who knows.
Also lmao I knew people reblogging my batshit crazy tags was gonna sell me out somehow.
I would find it so funny if Bruce Wayne, who has an ironic and slightly ridiculous disdain for the occult, had to grapple with his kids' deep belief in the occult. For instance, if one of their siblings went missing with no leads, Bruce would insist on a new search strategy while the kids would be convinced they should at least consult a medium once to get proof of life. The medium would call out Batman for his shitty energy and Bruce would contemplate all the life decisions that led to this.
Bruce being the one Houdini in a house of Conan Doyles, a fate worse than death. He’s still loves them, but he’s disappointed and exasperated with their occult-obsessed antics.
It’s ten times funnier because occultism actually works and works well in the DC universe.
Bonus points if his kids keep bringing Constantine around just to annoy Bruce with stupid party tricks.
i am so drunk but all i can think about is robin. his mother’s name for him, a piece of himself that dick put out into the world only to learn that he can never get it back. is it a good thing? because it helped all the people who came after him- it was a lifeline, a crutch, it gave them magic. but it also led to so much pain. jason died wearing his name, his family colours, never having had the chance to wear the suit dick gifted to him and dick didn’t even know till after jason was dead and buried. steph died trying to prove herself and robin was such an integral part of that desire. it was both a catapult for war games and also a manipulation tactic from bruce to get tim back. and dick had to watch as the colours became muted. he designed damian’s suit himself!!! and it’s so different from what he used to wear. and it helped damian- it gave him a purpose, it was the only solid thing in the avalanche of dick’s grief for bruce. and yet… yet. how can dick ever be completely okay with all the pieces of himself he has lost that he can never get back? the transformation of his parents’ love into a bloodied legacy that dick himself has had to perpetuate. everyone is guilty and everything hurts. but gotham looks at robin with hope. robin is the light in the black hole of batman’s darkness. robin saved him. robin saved bruce and everyone that came after him. is it a cost or a reward? dick can never know
You think the Batkids ever wrestle Killer Croc in a small store or something and absolutely fuck up the place, before wincing at the damage and signing a small apologetic sticky note that they leave on the till or something like, "I tried to avoid the freezers sorry :(".
Various Batfam members have totally asked Damian to do a funny voice impression so they can record it for their voice-mail. Damian takes an eclectic number of things as payments and has to be in the right mood, and Bruce is exasperated every time it happens because suddenly nobody is answering their phones so they can gleefully ask if you heard their new voice message.
Battinson!Bruce: *wears a slightly lighter shade of black*
Alfred: I see you're busting out the spring colours, sir.
