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Avant-Kitsch

@yuumei-art / yuumei-art.tumblr.com

YuumeiArt.com - The art and musings of a disillusioned idealist. - Linktr.ee/YuumeiArt
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Dandelion Hair (v2)

I started painting version 1 of Dandelion Hair in early 2021, but I was never happy with the result. I'm not even sure if I'm happy with version 2, but with each iteration I aim to improve until I am happy with it. Maybe in another year or two I'll tackle version 3~

Version 1

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#art#painting#dandelion hair
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Unreachable

Wandering mind, full of creation

Meandering lines, lost in elation 

Each stroke, I broke a little inside

Each fate, I hate. My will defied

I painted this in Feb 2022 about what it's like to be an artist with repetitive strain injury. In 2008, When I was 18, I made my first comic titled 1000 Words, it was about an artist helping a little girl with a broken family similar to my own. It received such positive feedback that I changed my Environmental Science major at UCBerkeley to Art major. Ever since then, my goal has been to tell stories with my art. Stories that are important to me. My next comic, Knite, was about a boy who wants to put the stars back into the polluted skies of China, my homeland. The comic after that, Fisheye Placebo, is a cyberpunk story about living in the age of technology, about fighting censorship and propaganda.

Unfortunately, I never got to finish Knite nor Fisheye Placebo. By the time I was 24, I was drawing day and night with no regards to my health. Not only did I get repetitive strain injury in my drawing hand, but my entire health suffered. My roommates had to rush me to the ER after fainting one night. I remember looking at my swollen right hand, my fingers like sausages, not even able to hold a pen, and just cry.

I've gone to the doctors and physical therapists. One told me I have Lupus (I do not), and another told me to put ice on it. More recently, I met a friend who happens to an amazing physical therapist and he was able to help me regain a lot of use of my hand. At my worst, I could only draw an hour a week, but now I am able to draw 2 hours a day. My hand is unlikely to fully heal, but I'm so grateful to regain what I have.

To my fellow artists who suffers the same, please know you're not alone. I can't promise that it'll get better, and it's cliche to say don't give up, but I want to keep hoping that no matter what the world throws at us, we will continue to make art.

#art#painting
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First, I want to address the rumors that I used AI to paint A Thousand Skies. Here is a condensed version of the 10 part video recording of how I painted everything. I normally reserve the full hours long video recordings for my patrons but here they are in case there is still any doubt https://drive.google.com/drive/folders/1d-3hxjZWROiZPaI8XeU93cKBBKB1Gz9Z?usp=drive_link

All of my past paintings have full video recordings for my Patrons, going back to 2018 when I first got a Patreon.

Long time followers will also know that I care deeply about the environment, not only in the themes of my art but also in my actions to the best of my ability and knowledge. So much so that every year since 2016, I’ve donated 100% of my Black Friday sales to environmental charities, and you can see all the receipts of the organizations I donated to here https://www.yuumeiart.com/blog 

I realized a comment I’ve made at 2am and while sleep deprived was confusing. I want to clear up the misunderstandings from yesterday's post where I said AI isn’t that bad for the environment. I thought I was specifically answering the question of how much energy it takes to generate 1 AI image on my own computer without any servers, but I realize now that people were talking about how much energy it takes to train AIs by big companies. This was not what I was trying to refer to in my comment, but I recognize it is one of many legitimate concerns with the way current generative AI is developed.

I want to reiterate that I did use AI for a gag scene in my comic—the character, Vance, was objectifying women by seeing them as anime cat girls and pasting them over AI backgrounds. I thought that such a character having AI goggles was making a point. I recognize that regardless of the context, the use of AI carries other ramifications. I will be taking all of this into consideration with my future artwork.

I know AI art is a very heated issue with very real concerns attached to its use. I don’t expect people to change their minds. I will continue to make art as I always have for the past 2 decades before AI existed, and continue to make available to my patrons full video recordings of the paintings I’ve made and will make. Thank you.

#art
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I've been told that there are rumors about me using AI for my paintings. Please use some common sense, I've been posting on DeviantART since 2003 and sharing full video recordings on Patreon since 2018. If I'm a fake, wouldn't my Patrons have noticed by now? Since AI has been turning artists against each other, accusing each other of using AI, I have no choice but to share of some the Patreon rewards as proof. Here is the 10 full video recordings of me painting A Thousand Skies from scratch

I built the 3D model base for this painting in Sketchup, which you can see here

When AI was at it's infancy, I was very excited to have a new tool to help me make comics. Long time followers will know I struggled with repetitive strain injury that forced my comic making to a crawl. A decade before AI, I was experimenting with 3D backgrounds for comics.

I still remember the hate I got for using 3D models in my comic backgrounds, even though today nobody blinks at other artists doing the same. 3D is now accepted as a tool to help artists create. I even remember hate for being digital instead of traditional.

I tested out painting over AI generated backgrounds a few times in the very early stages of AI. There are a lot of screenshots taken out of context from my Discord where I share how I paint everything with complete transparency.

The only other time I've used AI in my art is for a gag scene in my comic, the full context is my character, Vance, who is a weeb and tech nerd, was objectifying women by seeing them as anime cat girls pasted over AI flower backgrounds.

If I had downloaded a flower stamp brush from ClipStudio and made a similar flower background, nobody would care. But somehow this is not okay even though it fits the theme and joke of the comic?

It's 2AM where I am now so I won't say much else other than I wish people would stop taking my posts out of context. With everything going on in the world, artists should support each other, not make up reasons to hurt each other.

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This one truly took so long to paint 😭The video recording of the process took 10 sessions instead of the usual 3.

But I'm really happy with how it turned out! I've always loved the impressionist art style above all other oil painting styles, so it's been a blast studying the works of Monet and modern impressionists, and adding my own touch to the skies as well.

The full res image, painting process, and pphotoshop files will be part of July's Patreon rewards!

#art#painting#impressionism#skies#sunset#starry night#stars
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Inner Child The older I get, the more I keep my inner child locked inside. I used to talk more about my past, about my dysfunctional family and how they've hurt me. But these days I feel pressured to be positive, to only paint happy things because the world is sad enough already.

Since being diagnosed with CPTSD, I've gotten therapy and it has helped a lot. But that doesn't stop the nightmares from happening and there are days when I can't do anything but cry. I used to draw myself strangling my younger self, but it never dies. There will always be a part of me that longs for a happy family, for parents that love me. Maybe one day I'll learn to co-exist with that part of myself.

#art#painting#inner child#cptsd
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Shaping You

More illustrations for my WIP novel~ I loved sculpting with clay but there's always that uncanny valley moment when the shape is just human enough but no eyes yet. Or worse, the eyes didn't turn out right and I had to smooth them away to redo them. Kind of nightmare fuel ahahaha

HD files and more on Patreon.com/yuumei

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#art#painting#sculpture
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