‘Don’t feel guilty about resting’: Why rest is so important and how you can do it better
How much do you rest? Do you prioritise it? Maybe you feel you don't have time to rest? Or maybe you feel guilty about taking time out?
Radio presenter and author of The Art of Rest, Claudia Hammond, joined Jessica Creighton for BBC Radio 4’s Woman’s Hour special all about rest, to explain why it’s so important and how we can all make time to feel more rested.
Claudia was involved in the world’s largest ever study on rest, The Rest Test, conducted in 2016. It was launched on All in the Mind on BBC Radio 4 in collaboration with the Wellcome Collection, Hubbub and Durham University. They developed a questionnaire asking people what rest meant to them, how they rested and whether they would like more of it. She shared what she learnt about how to make your life a bit more restful.
Keep reading for Claudia’s advice...
1. Rest doesn’t have to mean doing nothing
“My friends thought it was very funny when I said I was writing a book on rest, because they were saying: ‘But, you never rest. You're always working and you're always doing things.’ But people have very, very different views and different ways of seeing rest”, says Claudia.
“Rest is something that relaxes you. It's something that's intentional, that's restorative, that leaves you feeling refreshed afterwards. But the key thing is, it doesn't have to mean doing nothing at all. In fact, lots of people find it very hard to sit and do nothing. It’s really difficult.
“You might be able to get more rest than you think. If you find cooking restful then that can count, as well as exercise or a train journey, provided you find it restful.”
2. Give yourself permission to rest properly
“Don’t feel guilty about resting”, says Claudia. In The Rest Test, more women said that they felt guilty whenever they rested, because there is always something else to be doing. One way of giving yourself permission to rest is to recognise the benefits it has for your mental health. You probably wouldn't feel guilty going for a run because you know that's good for you physically and mentally, but people do feel guilty about resting.
The most restful activities tend to be those that distract you from your worries and give you a break from other people.
"What you need to say to yourself is: There are proven benefits of this to your mental health and your memory and your cognitive function. Even if you get through your to-do list one day, new tasks will arrive the next. If you feel guilty about resting, remind yourself that breaks are good for your mental health.”
3. Test different activities until you find some that work for you
“Choose the two or three activities which you find truly restful and try to find 15 minutes a day to do them”, Claudia advises. In The Rest Test the most popular restful activities were reading, being in nature, spending time alone, listening to music and also doing nothing in particular.
“It does mean very different things to different people. For some people, it’s something that isn't active, like watching TV, and for others it’s exercise. For some people, they can't stop those thoughts whirring round and round in their brain until their body is exhausted. So, choose whatever you find restful.”
4. Try to spend some time alone
“The top five activities in The Rest Test were all things people tend to do alone”, says Claudia. “We looked at personality as well and even if you just took the extroverts, the top activities were still things they did alone. So, in one way, what we all need, which isn't easy for everyone to get, is some time on your own.
“The most restful activities tend to be those that distract you from your worries, allow your mind to wander, don’t make you feel guilty and give you a break from other people.”
5. Reframe your ‘wasted’ time as rest
“If you are really busy, you can spot some of the wasted time and reframe that as rest as well”, says Claudia. So, if you've missed a parcel and you have to go and queue at the delivery office for 10 minutes, you may think: How annoying is that?
If you are so busy that resting feels impossible, remember than even two-minute micro breaks can make a difference.
“But if somebody would say to you, ‘you can just rest now for 10 minutes and watch the world go by’, you might look at it differently. So, reframing those ‘wasted’ moments is another way of building some rest in. Perhaps you can get a tiny bit more rest than you think.”
6. Add small restful moments to your life
“If you are so busy that resting feels impossible, remember than even two-minute micro breaks where you stare out of the window or doodle or close your eyes or leave your desk to make a cup of tea, can make a difference to levels of concentration and wellbeing”, says Claudia.
“There was a really interesting study from South Korea where they got people at work to take these micro breaks throughout the day. If they did this each hour, at the end of the day their levels of wellbeing were higher.
“Personally, I love gardening and gardening is the thing I find really restful and peaceful. One of the things I do if I'm working at home is I will go out for 10 or 15 minutes and deadhead a few things. I used to feel guilty about doing that. Now I think: ‘This is for my mental health and I'm not going to feel guilty.’ The moment I'm out in the garden doing something, I can feel those waves of relaxation coming over me.”
7. Stop fetishising being busy all the time
“I think there’s a ‘cult of busyness’, if you like. Being busy has almost become a status symbol”, says Claudia. "If I see someone I know and they say: ‘How are you? How's work?’ I'll say: ‘Oh, I’m really busy. A bit too busy really.’ How much is that a claim to say: ‘Look how busy I am at work, look how important I must be?’
Find time to prescribe yourself 15 minutes of rest each day. Then put rest breaks in your diary like appointments.
“If we’re honest, I think it's very difficult to answer and say: ‘Oh, I've not been doing very much, really. I've been getting a bit of rest.’ We should feel that we can say that. It's a good thing to rest.”
8. Create a box of rest
“Get a box and put things you associate with rest in it”, says Claudia. “I really like crochet, so I might have a crochet hook and some wool, or a book of short stories and some bubble bath, because those are all things that I find restful. Then you've got a box you can turn to if you feel in need of some rest.
“What I'm suggesting is to try to find time to prescribe yourself 15 minutes of rest each day. Work out what the two or three activities that truly make you feel rested are and put those in your box. Then put rest breaks in your diary like appointments.”
For more wisdom on how to rest better, you can read Claudia’s book The Art of Rest. Or you can read the results of the most restful activities from The Rest Test here.
Listen back to the full episode of BBC Radio 4’s Woman’s Hour with Jessica Creighton on BBC Sounds – it's the episode from 26 December. Join the conversation on Instagram and Twitter @bbcwomanshour.
